[BNLsMOM]

I am discovering, with the help of my therapist that I am delusional about so many things that feel so real to me.

Now what?

My whole way of life, all my ability to function, my reasons for doing everything I do are based on delusions and I have to change everything in order to be healthy.

How do I move forward knowing that everything I think and do is not based in reality?

I am so confused...

[BNLsMOM]

It is really blowing my mind and making me wish I was still in the dark about things.

[Moreta]

i was trying to think of something philosophical to say, about being in the dark isn't good....but yeah, I've been dealing with the same situation too. I was telling my husband about it last night, and he just looked at me like I was insane.

I'll let you know if I figure anything out.

[SpottedOwl]

(((BNLsMOM)))

My whole way of life, all my ability to function, my reasons for doing everything I do are based on delusions and I have to change everything in order to be healthy.

How do I move forward knowing that everything I think and do is not based in reality?

If a bone breaks, and heals without being taken care of, it can heal crooked. The bone still functions, but not as well as it could. This one imbalance can affect the whole body, as each muscle has to adapt to account for the crooked bone.

Yes, everything in your reality is affected by whatever delusions you hold. (And, I think we all hold delusions, it is a rather human condition.) But, that does not mean that ALL of you needs fixing. Maybe it is just one broken bone that needs to be re-set, and then your whole reality is able to feel more balanced.

You move forward by being kind to yourself. You've done good work with T, and now you deserve to relax and just let it soak in.

[Ascension]

I agree with SpottedOwl. Let yourself be glad of the awareness you and your therapist have made. I know my mind can try to trick me into thinking that this is all I know so let's stay here. I have a habit of watching televisions shows about wilderness survival. They get stranded in the middle of nowhere and they at first get scared, but then they decide I am making camp right here. It's a satisfactory camp, but certainly not a stay at the Hyatt. They stay for a couple days and food starts to get scarce and then the prospect really sets in. "Do I stay here and wait it out? Or do I go and try to find my way out of here?" It's a scary decision. Kind of like our daily lives. Are we happy here or do we find our way out? I think you should be happy with the prospect of taking the next step.

[lonegael]

BNLsMOM, even if there are delusional aspects about your life, your thoughts have some reference frame and some connection to what is going on in you. What is going on in you is also a reality, so don't get too wierded out on yourself.
A lot of very creative, very smart people reframe reality so that they can manage it. I may not share that view of the world, but it doesn't mean that the reframing is wrong or unreal. If it is giving you trouble now, then yes, it needs to be taken care of. However, I think that you will be able to identify fixed points that bridge other people's reality and yours, and this will help you reorganize your life.
I don't know if this makes sense to you dear, but when you talk this through with your T, I think you can find that your life is not as far out as you are afraid it might be. HUGGS and courage in big servings.