[Scolaiocht]

My birth mom has had and struggled with Bipolar Disorder all of her life. Although I'm adopted and she hasn't raised me, my sister and I still attempt to keep in contact with her.

Unfortunately, she frequently uses change of medication/not feeling well as an excuse not to see us, and we're well aware part of this is because of her battle with Bipolar.

For those who are Bipolar or have experience with this, how do you maintain a social connection with someone when they are battling Bipolar? My sister and I don't want to upset her, but we would still like to have some kind of relationship with her.

My sister and I only have basic knowledge of Bipolar, so I'm guessing knowing more about it would also help us.

[Eloise42]

Can you keep in touch through email? When i'm low the hardest people to be around are the people who are the most important, but I can usually write to them even when I'm down.

The simplest way I understand/think about bipolar is that it is a very rare chemical imbalance in our brains causing us to have such extreme moods that we are overwhelmed. Think about the worst you've ever felt and the best you've ever felt and multiply it until it's so extreme you can't get out of bed or fall sleep or go to work.

As far as I know we are pretty much born this way and it seems to be slightly genetic. My great-grandfather was bipolar, other people in my family have serious depression and anxiety problems but as far as I know I'm the only other one who is bipolar.

Even when we are on medication we can still have ups and downs. The tide goes in and out. There are times when your mother might have an easier time communicating. I would look for ways of less directly communicating. If something wonderful is happening in your life send her a little message news update about it and how happy you are. Even if she doesn't respond I can't imagine that wherever/however she is she wouldn't like to know that you are doing good.

[musikcrazy]

Kudos to you for trying to get more information. I definitely think knowing more about Bipolar Disorder will help with your relationship with her. Letting her know that you understand will be a big help. I think it is good advice to try emailing or writing when she is having a rough time. There are some great books out there to help you understand and maybe you can by some for your birth Mom as encouragement to her.
Socializing for some people with Bipolar Disorder is very difficult. When you feel bad you just want to shut the whole world out. Do you know anything about the meds she is on?