[unsureheart]

Hi I am new to this- I am here for a famiy member who was diagnosed with bipolar in December 2009 - since then he has been good and taking his meds and just recently I have noticed signs like before that are "not normal" and am sad and scared and dont know what to do. He is not getting dressed and saying lucid things and just seems far away at times. Any suggestions? It breaks my heart and I want to help him. Any advice or suggestions would be greatly appreciated.
Thanks.....

Welcome, unsureheart! It's not at all unusual for folks with BP to need meds adjustments. Even when we've been really good about taking them. Does he happen to have an appointment with his P-doc anytime soon? If not, it'd be a good idea to get one set up, as the effectiveness of the meds could be assessed and tweaked if needed. Good luck and it is good he has someone who cares to notice. Kudos to you.

[FeelingHopeful]

unsure heart i can really relate to your story myself.

[WendyAussie]

Firstly, congtats to you for caring about your loved one with mental illness. My family has totally bailed, except for the ones I had to bail from as they won't seek help for mental illness or addiction (I am fully engaged with my mental health team and am 11 years sober).

I agree with Innerzone that a meds change and overall psych asessment definitely needs to be done. If he won't do it, I would ring his psychiatrist and tell them what is happening. If he gets pissed of at that, don't worry - it's better him alive and well and pissed off at you than the alternative. I have been in the state he is in and truly, the events that unfolded mean that me being alive today is a highly unlikely thing. Then, even in the meantime, if he escalates into imminent self-harm, immediately call an ambulance. Again, better him pissed off than the alternative. Having said all that, you own welfare is in the mix here too and you can only do your best - there are many factors at play that aren't in your power to change and you need to try to have some emotional detachment, even while taking positive actions.

[sugahorse1]

Yeah, sometimes it may be necessary for you as an outsider to intervene. This is a whole lot easier if you are a close family member or friend. What are his thoughts on his changing behaviour? Have you spoken to him about it? I have a friend at work who I've confided in, and asked her to intervene if necessary, given her full right to take me aside if she thinks I'm behaving out of character or even push me to go to hospital if needed.
Especially if you are going through a manic episode, you cannot discern right from wrong, and you definitely don't realise you are doing anything wrong or terribly different.
Thanks for the support you have shown your friend!

[grizmom]

I agree with the others; it sounds like a med adjustment is needed, especially if it persists for more than a few days. Take care!!

[Skully]

I really admire your willingness to help him. What I would do is call his doctor and arrange for an emergency visit so the doctor can see the symptoms himself. Medication adjustments or even hospitalization may be needed.

[unsureheart]

Originally Posted by FeelingSad

unsure heart i can really relate to your story myself.

Feeling sad, do you have a family member who suffers from BP? It is so hard some days to feel so helpless and not knowing what to do help them...this site does seem to help a bit to talk to other who are going through this that are not your family...or related.... stay strong -

[unsureheart]

Thanks for all of your thoughts.... it is just so confusing.. saturday he was terrible- mean, seems like he is not with us, aggressive, etc and then tonight he was great! he was happy, loveable and smiling... thank you all for your kind words- AUSSIE - YOU GO! 11 YEARS SOBER - stay strong and keep up the power!

[FeelingHopeful]

Unsure Heart, I think my friend may be and also a family member so i have been coming on here to learn about it, educate myself so that i can help them and support them 100 percent , Is yours a family member too? Sometimes I get nervous im saying thewrong thing, thats why i love it here, the information is so good and really helps, How are you holding up unsure?

[FeelingHopeful]

Aussie , thats wonderful!!! Stay strong

[WendyAussie]

FeelingSad, you're like hen's teeth as well in really caring for, in the long haul, someone with mental illness and being proactive about educating yourself. I say this because of my own experience of being rejected snd isolated because of my illness and the many people I speak to with mental illness across the several sites I particpate in.

[sugahorse1]

I'm sure I must scare my boyfriend too some days. He's the only person I'm really close with, that knows about the BP, and also doesn't suffer from it.
The other person I'm close with suffers from BP too, so she can relate.

I hope your friend improves soon - try get him to see his Pdoc and get the medes adjusted; continuous ups and downs are probably as hard for him as they are for you