[Lea81]

So I have been going to my T for about 2 months now. I have been dx with PPD, OCD and Generalized Anxiety.

I'm fairly certain I am also bi-polar (obviously I am not a doctor, but I feel like I know myself) Every time I bring this up to my therapist I feel like she brushes it off and says you are not bipolar. Today I think she was sick of me bringing it up and gave me a mood tracker to track my moods for a month.

I have taken both the bipolar test as well as the sanity test scoring high for both in the bipolar range (again, I know this is not meant to be a diagnostic tool)

Here are some of the things I have going ton to lead me to believe I may have some bipolar tendencies.

* Lot's of highs and lows. (I am a SAHM some weeks/days I am super mom, everything is planned out, I don't yell, we are doing crafts and projects and I am very involved and playing with them. The house is spotless, all three meals and snacks are well thought out and perfect. then the other times I yell about EVERYTHING (god my poor kids, I don't want to yell at them, I want them to love their mom) I sit and watch TV or surf the Internet all day. They eat cereal for breakfast, sandwiches for lunch, chicken nuggets for dinner etc. The house is a mess and I have no motivation to do anything.

* I'm very impulsive with money. I don't take no for an answer from my husband (god, he is amazing for sticking with me) I will just spend spend spend and forgo paying bills. No matter how many times we hit rock bottom I bring us right back down again somehow.

* I think I am going to go back to school. I pick out 100 careers that I am going to go into. I am so excited and can't wait to start (which, I'll never be able to go back to school right now because I defaulted on my student loans) But then I remember I can't follow through with anything, ever. I set these goals, wishes, etc but just never follow through.

I am sure there are more, but these stand out. What do you think I should do? Bring it up again with my T? Do these not sound like bi-polar?

I appreciate if you read the entire thing. I didn't mean for it to get this long.

Thank You,
Lea

[Lea81]

No one has any advice?

[onlymedid]

Just got home from work and saw your post.
I definitely would bring it up to T. Lots of those could indicate Bipolar, but it really takes a specialized Pdoc to diag it.
I would print out this post and take it to T. Maybe you and T could expand on it further, see what other feelings are underlying.
Try to keep track of your moods on that mood chart. When you are in a space where you are agitated, ask yourself if something is making you feel that way.
The money part is huge because it could cause major financial strain. My husband has control over all of his money and I have mine. I have to take care of my bills and then whatever is left I can spend. He never gives me money, he puts it to a bill if needed. I try to keep out of the stores as much as possible because I could easily splurge on shoes and clothes!
Another thing, because I know you worry about yelling at the kids, maybe you can take a deep breath, go in the room and yell into a pillow, something like that. I have to do that ALL the time.
Do you have a psychiatrist? Are you on any meds right now? My T tells me the same thing sometimes, well...she says, " Are you sure it's Bipolar or are you just extra anxious/irritated/etc.?" I'm like...Ummm..yeah, it is the Bipolar because there is nothing causing this.
Anyways, I hope you can get some answers. Not having answers causes so much anxiety and frustration for me, I don't know how it would be for you, though.

[onomonapetia]

I know exactly how you feel! I could almost be you! I am bipolar and recently was also diagnosed adhd as well. Believe me, it's hard! You sound like you could fall into both of those categories, but I am no doctor. They are very hard to distinguish between each other and together, well, that spells disaster (which is the state I am currently in)! My t doesn't listen to me either. All we talk about is my dreadful mother in law. We NEVER address any of my mental disorders which I don't get and it is really starting to piss me off. All I can say is that if your t doesn't listen to you then you might have to see another. That's all I got. I am going to my pdoc tomorrow for the same issue. He could have saved me from a panic attack this past weekend if he had listened to me last week at my appt. I hate when they don't listen! I am right there with ya girl! It will get better. I had to tell myself today to just ride it out. What goes up, must come down, but it also goes the other way too! I'm here for you if you want to talk!

[Amandas256]

I think that I would probably try to go to another T. I haven't had therapy yet but, I'm about to start. If my T doesn't want to listen to me, I'm gonna find another. You deserve the right to be listened to no matter what. Hang in there! It will get better!

[BlackPup]

I have my doctor for my drugs, and my therapist for counselling. with my therapist it does not matter if I am bipolar or not, cos it's about how I think not about when my brain goes out of control.

Being diagnosed with BP (albiet 7 years late!) was great coz I got more effective drugs that help my brain work better.

I guess what I'm trying to say is that a doctor (preferably Psychiatrist) is the best person to talk to about BP coz they can work with you on your meds. As far as your therapy is concerned, try to deal with the things that you can change regardless of what labels you have been given or not given.

With the money thing, regardless of if you are diagnosed witih bipolar, you can do what many people with bipolar do and have their access to money (esp credit cards) restricted by their friends and familly, either all the time or just when they are at risk. Also onlyme's suggestion of keeping out of stores when you want to spend money is a really good idea. Developing stratagies like this or how to deal with your moods and your kids are what your therapist should be able to help you with - regardless or any stupid labels. If not then maybe its worth finding one that can help you.

Best of luck

[Anneinside]

I wouldn't give up on the therapist quite yet. She gave you the mood tracker so that she could see your mood states. As for being bipolar, if the spending is associated with a manic/hypomanic state which usually includes racing thoughts, great mood or irritability then it would be an indication of bipolar. If it happens all the time it would not be part of the bipolar. From WebMD - Mania symptoms may include excessive happiness, excitement, irritability, restlessness, increased energy, less need for sleep, racing thoughts, high sex drive, and a tendency to make grand and unattainable plans.