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#1
Dec 10, 2010, 01:14 AM
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Have you ever called a crisis hotline...but cannot answer their questions honesty because you KNOW they will send the cops to get you?
I am supposed to bring my lethal amount of drugs to this partial program tomorrow. I cannot. I cannot lose my hope, my plan. I called the crisis line because I am struggling with this decision. I don't know what my treatment team will do if I don't bring those drugs. I am an educated woman, a previous high school English teacher...but I act like a child when I am around these people. I don't talk, I don't follow their requests, etc. They gave me Sonata, Klonopin, Lamictal, and of course I have the 15,000 mg of Depakote. I immediately abused the Sonata and Klonopin. I just want peaceful sleep and to put my mind at rest. From your experience, what do you think they'll do to me if I don't bring the drugs? What if I lie, say I don't have them, but bring them in case they threaten the hospital? What if it comes down to it and they give me no choice. If I admit that I lied, I wonder what their reaction will be? Maybe I shouldn't even go... |
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#2
Dec 10, 2010, 02:16 AM
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You know deep down that handing those meds in is the right thing for you to do. Then you need to deal with understanding why you feel you need to have a back-up plan for suicide. Please hand them in.
Aren't suicide hotlines anonymous? i.e. they cannot send the cops to you, as you haven't disclosed your name or location?
__________________
"I'd rather attempt to do something great and fail than to attempt to do nothing and succeed. Robert H. Schuller" Current dx: Bipolar Disorder Unspecified Current Meds: Epitec (Lamotrigine) 300mg, Solian 50mg, Seroquel 25mg PRN, Metformin 500mg, Klonopin prn |
 Skully
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#3
Dec 10, 2010, 05:07 AM
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I have never called, but I have been on the other end of the phone. I worked as a mental health crisis delegate for 5 years. And yes, sugahorse is right, it can be totally anonymous. If it is a county system we ask for name and insurance so we can bill for the call but you do not have to give it to us. We will still talk to you regardless of whether or not you give your name and information. They cannot turn you away for that. If they do, file a complaint.
I would go. Take the meds, be brave. You life is worth living trust me.
__________________
Be who you are and say what you feel... Because those who matter.. Don’t mind... And those who mind.. Don’t matter." (Dr. Seuss) 
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#4
Dec 11, 2010, 12:14 AM
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It's a hard thing to give up your plan.. I didn't tell anyone for a long time coz I didn't want to give it up, but then I decided that I really did want to live and it was easier to not have the temptation around...
PM sugahorse about her new forum for suicide support...
__________________
 I can do all things through him who gives me strength
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This is an old thread. You probably should not post your reply to it, as the original poster is unlikely to see it.|
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