[hentaywee]

I apologize if this is long, or off topic, but I wasn't sure where else to vent and maybe get another's point of view.

I'm not on disability, the hearing is in a few months. I currently am self-employed as a tutor for students wanting to obtain their GED. But I also have group meetings 3 times a week. I try to work my schedule around the students times. But now one of my clients who's been taking too much time to complete the math, wants all of my free time to tutor and finish.This is because a job she's been offered gave her a short time to get it done or not get the job. But there is a long history of them calling to make it a later time, or not showing. I told them we could work more, but the full effort had to put in. Yet they were late twice in the last week, and called today to make it a later time. I've told all of my students that any job will want a ged these days. And its not something you can do overnight.

Well my supervisor called to ask if I could work another student into my schedule. So I called the one that I was talking about, just to ask if it would work for her if we either met 30-60min earlier to keep the full tutoring time, or if she would mind me leaving about 10min sooner to be able to get to the office to work with a new client. She went on a f**king rampage on the phone, saying I've changed her times around all the time. That she'd rather get a tutor that kept the times, etc. Yet I"m the one who has always been flexible and changed my times around, waited for her when she was late, or lost hours due to her not even showing.

So I ended up hanging up and calling her case worker, who agreed with how I felt. She called the dept mngr, who then called the student and me. THe student treated her the same way on the phone. But my supervisor wants her to finish and get out of the program, that I had to drop the new client for now, and continue to tutor the original one.

But it's totally putting my emotions in a tornadic spin. I was happy this morning. Then after meeting with her, frustrated because she had said she'd do the few simple exercises over the weekend, and hadn't. And more than half of our time was spent on her late, and having to get other things done first. I believe I'm not the only one who has the responsibilty of being on time and prepared. So I was in a mixed mood during group, having fun, yet feeling like I wasn't doing my job right. Then all this s**t this afternoon with trying to add another client, the one getting p.o'd. And trying to explain it all to my multiple supervisors.

For the last 2 hours I've been so mad, depressed, and frustrated that I havn't had the courage to even leave my bed. All my meds are right out in the hallway. I've even joked? asking my cat if I should just go walk in front of a car now so I don't have to think about tomm or any of this stuff.

Anyways, sorry this rant was so long. I had to get some of it off my mind. But I have figured out I'm not going back to school for a degree in education

[Tsunamisurfer]

Originally Posted by hentaywee

For the last 2 hours I've been so mad, depressed, and frustrated that I havn't had the courage to even leave my bed. All my meds are right out in the hallway. I've even joked? asking my cat if I should just go walk in front of a car now so I don't have to think about tomm or any of this stuff.

(((hentaywee)))
It really is a tough one when people behave selfishly and then blame it on you. Do what you can to be reasonable, but don't allow emotional blackmail to rule you. Finish on time. If she is late, that is her choice.

Cats give wonderful advice sometimes, but I often get the impression they stray from the topic and have breakfast on their minds . My neighbour's cat would advise you that it is fine to walk in front of the car if it is parked, and if it has just got back from a drive, you should step in a mud puddle, walk up the back of the car, over the roof, slide down the windscreen, then curl up on the wonderfully warm bonnet.

[eskielover]

Ugh,.....if she can't be on time & can't do the work just to get her GED, she will never hold down a job by being on time or doing the necessary work......sounds like quite a looser you are trying to deal with.....no wonder you are feeling horrible. It's hard to feel like putting forth your 100% effort on someone who just doesn't care & isn't really working on successfully doing the work necessary to succeed.

I give you a lot of credit for the patience that you have had so far with her.....hope you can keep up enough patience to get her through & OUT of the system.

Like I said, with her lack of handling responsibility.....doubt that she will succeed in the job that's being offered to her.....but who knows....at least you won't have to be dealing with her anymore.

Keep up the faith & your good work......this too shall pass.

[hentaywee]

Originally Posted by eskielover

Ugh,.....if she can't be on time & can't do the work just to get her GED, she will never hold down a job by being on time or doing the necessary work......sounds like quite a looser you are trying to deal with.....no wonder you are feeling horrible. It's hard to feel like putting forth your 100% effort on someone who just doesn't care & isn't really working on successfully doing the work necessary to succeed.

I give you a lot of credit for the patience that you have had so far with her.....hope you can keep up enough patience to get her through & OUT of the system.

Like I said, with her lack of handling responsibility.....doubt that she will succeed in the job that's being offered to her.....but who knows....at least you won't have to be dealing with her anymore.

Keep up the faith & your good work......this too shall pass.

Thanks everyone. You both seemed to put my thoughts into words. I agree with her not being able to make it. But its my habit of not giving up or perfectionism that gets me this way I'm still working on assertiveness and knowing when to say no. Just feels like I'm working with 5yr olds instead of adults

I decided to use my sleeping meds tonite, or i'd be awake til morn. I'll let everyone know how the day goes tomm. God help me get though it without going crazy

[eskielover]

I understand that perfectionism.....it's something that has always driven me & also driven me crazy at times.

Think in most cases (not all) many who are getting their GED are there because they couldn't make it through the regular schooling & aren't as mature as others. Most are there because they want to be or they would have just dropped out & left it at that, but some still have the personality issues that caused them not to get through highschool in the first place......unfortunately, some probably aren't any more mature than 5 yr olds........really does take patience.......

Just think.....I will do the best I can with what I have to work with.....you will make it through this....& hopefully on to others who care a lot more about what they are doing.

[hentaywee]

Originally Posted by eskielover

I understand that perfectionism.....it's something that has always driven me & also driven me crazy at times.

Think in most cases (not all) many who are getting their GED are there because they couldn't make it through the regular schooling & aren't as mature as others. Most are there because they want to be or they would have just dropped out & left it at that, but some still have the personality issues that caused them not to get through highschool in the first place......unfortunately, some probably aren't any more mature than 5 yr olds........really does take patience.......

Just think.....I will do the best I can with what I have to work with.....you will make it through this....& hopefully on to others who care a lot more about what they are doing.

I kept starting to dial my work's number today. Just plan didn't want to go, and was almost set on quitting. The session today was pretty tense, but we both managed to not say anything about the probs and made it through the time. Was still ticked when we had to keep stopping because of her mother talking on the phone or the baby getting fussy

About time to head out again for my evening tutoring session. This student has more determination at least. When I get home, I'm having ice cream for supper

You guys have been a great support