Worth a laugh if nothing else. When I am manic the voices hear can be either more of the commentary type, or the can also be commentary cheerleaders, cheering me on. Not all the time tho, because sometimes the can just be talking amongst them selves.

When depressed tho they become the demeaning, mean, and loud monsters. As I slip to deppresion they are right there by my side, continuously telling me over and over that I don't want to be here. It's so noisy, when I say no I do want to be here, they reply, no, no you don't!

I know I am not stable and I know the voices are really coming from me, but why can they not b stable haha, Why must they too have Bipolar. Or at least give me a few days to settle into the depression before showing up. Is this me fighting the sui? I couldn't follow through with that, I had made attempts when I was younger, but I have children now and it isn't an opinion for me, I am their only parent. Feels like the voices are always testing me, pushing to see if they can get my unwavering stance on sui to change. Of course I do "feel" suicidal when I am depressed, but i won't allow myself to give it thought o power. I wish I could find a way to get the voices back off. I am already taking meds for this it's not that helpful.

It is annoying listening to this "you don't want to be here" 24-7. I wish it would stop.

[Starvin4Perfection]

Hmm... has your Dr put you on any medication to help the voices go away?

Yes, and the antipsychotics never help that much as far as this goes.

[Starvin4Perfection]

What have you tried so far?

Zyprexa currently with lithium, seroquel, Riperdal, and Thorazine.

[kaliope]

my pdoc has me on haldol. the voices went right away. it is so nice and quiet in there now. its funny, well not really, but i never acknowledged, noticed, whatever, the voices all those years i was dealing with my illness. then one day i finally sat down and wrote out "what goes on in my head" so i could try to make sense how maddening things were in there for me. thats when i finally realized i was being held captive so to speak by these voices and that they were making the cycles worse for me. they were always there to put me down, trash me. tell me how much i deserved to suffer and die. "die b*%$h die". i showed it to my T and he said it was co-consciousness, my pdoc questioned DID. neither explored it any further as it wasnt there when i was stable and went away with haldol.

[Starvin4Perfection]

Originally Posted by kaliope

my pdoc has me on haldol. the voices went right away. it is so nice and quiet in there now. its funny, well not really, but i never acknowledged, noticed, whatever, the voices all those years i was dealing with my illness. then one day i finally sat down and wrote out "what goes on in my head" so i could try to make sense how maddening things were in there for me. thats when i finally realized i was being held captive so to speak by these voices and that they were making the cycles worse for me. i showed it to my T and he said it was coconsciousness, my pdoc questioned DID. neither explored it any further as it wasnt there when i was stable and went away with haldol.

I was actually going to mention the same medication. My dad says God speaks to him... I'm happy the medication helped.

[aeylania]

Thanks for this post, its always nice to know I'm not alone. The voices get bad for me too, but they're much better with the Abilify. Get off the Abilify and the entire symphony comes back. Some bad days they still creep in and I have to literally shout in my own head "Shut up and go away! I will not listen to you!" Sometimes I visualize a car slamming on the breaks and pulling over, or I count back from ten slowly, picturing the numbers in my mind.

I hope your doctor can get you on something that helps you!

[SunAngel]

I am on Abilify for my paranoia when manic. Now, when I am manic, I just get a little bit of paranoia. Abilify has been a Godsend to me in that aspect.

I know others who have gone on Haldol too and it worked wonders for them.

Hope you find something that will calm those voices down for yourself.

I keep hearing good things about haldol and abilify. I think I'll ask about these two. Do they work for any of you for visual hallucinations, or tactile too?

Sometimes I will tell the voices I do want to be here but they argue back , I try my best to tune it out, but it is always so loud, first thing when I wake, last thing when I go to sleep, making it hard to sleep.

thanks for the input, and yes its nice not to be alone in this, tho it sucks others have to endure the same.

[mgran]

Blummin eck, sounds like the doctor has you on a right cocktail of drugs! What you say about the voices following mood makes sense to me. Particularly the positive voice of mania suddenly become the jeering mob of depression.