[BuggsBunny]

My non BP, unmedicated sister just had the gall to tell me I was on too much medication and should stop all of it to clean out my system! And she knew I didn't want to hear this, but I needed to. That I was too groggy during the day, and using too much caffeine to be alert in the morning (about one cup of coffee!) I told her this amount of meds kept me stable, able to homeschool, and still get a good night's sleep. She didn't listen. Just kept nagging.

Granted, I'm on a lot of medication for various disorders, but it takes this much to keep me going. And I'm not on an over abundance for any one disorder, it's just that there are so many problems with my body, the meds add up.

What do I do to get her off my case? I live with her, so I can't afford a rift between us. But still, I don't need her condescending attitude, like I'm some child taken to task for being bad.

Help, please, this one is new to me!

Thanks!

[Trippin2.0]

I went thru the same thing, and I was only on 3 meds at minimum dosage each.

Turns out my family was just worried about wether each drug was neccessary and what the long term physical effects would be. So it came from a good place.

When the pdoc added a 4th to counter side effects I chucked them all out tho

Maybe your sister's genuinly worried about you, but not communicating effectively... Atleast I hope that's the case

[grandmaof3]

My son told me the same thing about all my meds, I've got several other meds besides my bipolar meds and I need them all. It is very aggravating. I just tell him that I know he is just concerned, but well respected doctors have prescribed these medications for a reason. I remind him what I was like before I was medicated and he has got to admit I seem better off. He is just concerned that all that medication might do me harm. I explained the purpose of each drug to him and told him how much better I felt and he hasn't said anything else about it. Good luck with your sister. I'm sure she just worries because she loves you.

[argv]

I get this all the time from friends and family. "do you really need all those?" "Are you just a guinea pig for drug companies?" "Are you sure you even have problems?" and yadda yadda.

You might explain to her that, you understand she cares about you and your well being, but rest assured, although she cannot physically SEE the crazy amount of thoughts and things going on in your head, they are there, constantly, making everything else hard to concentrate on, and the meds do many things to help control those thoughts.

Just my 2 cents, but you get it for free.

[BuggsBunny]

I know she loves me, but it's the condescending nagging about my weight (medication induced) and my grogginess in the morning (medication induced) that frustrate me. If she would come to me as a peer and say hey, show what all this stuff is for, I'd be fine. My 11 year old niece knows more about why I take what I take than my sister does! (Altho she doesn't understand bipolar, she can grasp depression.) She came downstairs one morning when I was taking my pills and asked what they were, and why I took them. So I told her. Not in vivid detail, just in general terms. (Rest assured, the meds are out of reach and out of sight except when I am taking them.) So why can't my 40 something sister just ASK and not judge???

@argv, our posts crossed while I was typing. You have a good point there.

[venusss]

well, I can see why she would be concerned about the weight and grogginess... are you sure it's condescending? Maybe she just thinks it's worrisome.

I think you just need to sit with her and explain her you are aware of these side effects, but that for you it is a reasonable trade off. Tell her it is not helping you when she is "nagging" like this.

[Mikita6630]

the other posters are right maybe if you sat her down and told her what the meds are for she would understand, heck give her a printout of what they are for( just not the side effecs) then maybe she would understand and get off your back sisters are always going to nag I have come to this conclusion

[BuggsBunny]

Well, to add fuel to the fire, before I had a chance to sit her down and talk, she just told me I shouldn't get on the forum anymore because it's not good for me to be with all these depressed people . I tried to explain that I get support, that my moods right now are the dose change from the lamictal - not the forum - and that sometimes I can actually help someone, which makes me feel good. She backed off about the forum, but went on to tell me I've been out of whack since Disney World in November. Yes, it's called Post DW letdown, followed by a winter depression. In her eyes, I just talked myself into a winter depression, it's not really that bad (OMG!!!) I tried, I swear I tried, to explain chemical depression vs situational, but she's going on about staying up late and sleeping too late, Despite the fact that I get up at 8 every morning, regardless of how many times I was up and in pain during the night.

She just doesn't get it. I want her to walk in my shoes for a couple of weeks and see if she gets it then!!!!!!

Thanks for letting me blow off steam.

[Mikita6630]

blow off as much as you want we are here to listen trust me I have one of those sisters of my own and she is my younger sister so trust me I know where you are coming from

[mgran]

I get the same thing from my father, and I'm only on seroquel and lamotrigine. He is also concerned about my weight and lack of energy.

It's because they love us... but it's still annoying as all hell.

Hmm being on a support forum, for support, harmful?? Well. I dunno. She can talk to me.... I can be p-p-p-pukingly positive sometimes , just kidding.

With the meds, really it is usually a choice of lesser of two evils. At least for me. Still not to late to sit down an have a talk with her. Explain to her that you would like her to have some faith in you and trust your judgement. Maybe take some time to write down some "evidence" of how you are benifiting. She likely is worried, but if she keeps bugging you about it, it only adds to your stress. When you are talking to her just try to keep your cool and stick to all those "I" statements, just try to keep assertive and hopefully she will hear and understand what you are trying to say.

As far as the forum goes, for a lot of us it isn't just the support, but the understanding, connecting with people who have been there. I hope she will be able to be more at ease and trust your judgement.

[BuggsBunny]

Thanks everyone for the support and ability to rant and rave today. I will try and find time this weekend to sit her down and explain my meds to her. I'll have to make myself a note to remember those I statements!!

[RapidFlyer]

BuggsBunny,

There are always two sides to a story. I believe everyone here has stated the important fact that your sister cares and loves you. She wants whats best. She may even be scared for you and not know how to cope with that feeling.

There is also the other side. How you present to her and the family. I know I have major blind sides about how I act, think, talk, and behave when I am loaded up on all of my meds, suffering the after effects of a sleepless night, and simply in pain. A suggestion might be to ask what her perception of what you are like might be.

Be ready to hear the worst and be loving and open if you go this route. Communictions needs to be a two way street.

If you need someone to work this out with I'm Available.

PM me or whatever.

[BuggsBunny]

I may very well take you up on this when I get her to sit down and talk with me. Right now we are in the middle of a massive remodel, with a potential buyer coming in a bout a week. I believe this has ramped up her stress level great deal, something I didn't take into consideration before.

I know she loves me a great deal, otherwise I would not be living with her and schooling her daughter. I just have to remember that, too. Thanks for the reminder about two sides to each story.