[xraydiva09]

Hello all....

Like alot of you, I think I am in a medication slump. My bi-polar meds seem to half way work, but half way dont...(diagnosed finally with BPII about a year ago). Looking for some insight/advice as to how to handle this....tired of riding the med-go-round, even though it seems to be a normal thing with this disorder until you get it right....Currently I am on:

Topamax: 25mg in the morning and 25mg at night (for mood stabilizer)
Celexa: 30mg at night (for depression-recently upped from 20 because the 20mg was pooping out.)
Cytomel: 25mg in the morning for energy (trying to combat the sleepyness that one of these meds is causing)

Ok-good thing is the Topamax is doing the job as far as the crazy thoughts and what nots going on inside my head. It has really stabilized those, so I dont know if I need a dose increase. I also like it because I havent had side effects from it (I used to take Lamictal, but had to stop because of the rash).

Bad thing....I am thinking the Celexa is not doing the job. I have been on it for a long time at 20mg, recently just upped to 30mg because it seemed like it was losing its effectiveness. While it has helped take the edge off the depression, it doesnt seem totally gone. I still find myself having to fake it and put on my big girl panties to make it through the day, and just am not feeling 100% as far as clear headed and happy. I just dont feel good and feel weighted down by something but cant put a finger on it. I am also freaking tired ALL OF THE TIME!!!!!! I could sleep all day and all night if I was able to...the only good thing with the Celexa is that I actually do get out of bed and function, not as depressed, no suicidal thoughts, not as much crying....but as I said before, something just doesnt feel right.

So I'm in a pickle.....do I just ask my PDoc to ditch the whole SSRI thing, and maybe try an SNRI (like Cymbalta)? Or do I stay on my coctail and maybe up the Topamax (I have heard that when you up mood stabilizers that they actually have a reverse effect and you get energy? Is there something out there to actually give me energy, because the stupid Cytomel isnt doing anything....we are experimenting with that. If it doesnt start doing something, we had talked about me going on Provigil. I dont know what to do. I hate messing around with meds too much because my last PDoc about killed me with the concoction she tried to put me on. I dont want to medication jump too much, as I hate all the side effects out there and I am really sensitive to alot of the meds. Any advice is greatly appreciated!!!

[BipolaRNurse]

I wouldn't do anything without checking with your current pdoc. These meds are nothing to fool around with on your own---even I won't mess with 'em, and I've been a nurse for 15 years. Too many ways for things to go wrong!

Of course, I'm newly diagnosed and just coming off my first-ever mixed episode, which freaked me out totally and really made me thankful for what little sanity I have left. So I'm toeing the line and being scrupulous about following my pdoc's instructions to the letter........we'll see how I am in a year or two when I'm more confident about everything, LOL.

[xraydiva09]

Thanks for your reply BP Nurse!! No no no, I would never do anything without checking with doc/following doc orders....not a self medicator....my luck, I would take some pill and sprout a third eye in the middle of my forehead....its just so frustrating...and then in the back of my mind, I wonder sometimes if I am even being treated for the right thing? I suppose all Bi-Polar patients wonder that, but I also took a look at ADHD in adults (guilty of being an internet diagnoser lol) and alot of those descriptions fit to a t.....the depression, the channel changing in my head, the inattentiveness....but I supposed we can all be a little ADHD at times....
Anyway....sorry to hear about your episode....sounds scary, but thankfully you are getting help and hopefully will find the right meds for you to get you through all of this. It is very scary...the disorder alone is scary enough, and then throw some strange medications into the mix can be a recipe for disaster....