med compliance ... ideas

I don't see a difference. Ultimately, if you're not compliant, you're not choosing to be "properly medicated". For me, I'm not so compliant. Why? I struggle with the medication question.

Interesting because Welburtin was the one I was thinking I was willing to go back on. It didn't touch my mood swings but it kept me from getting those lows that lasted. I still had some depression here and there, but it was never months on end of hating myself.

What I've also learned now, looking back, is that I had an interesting med combo. I was only on anti depressants because I was seeing a GP who figured that's all I had. It just ended up being a combo that killed my main manic feature, hyper sexuality. I was on Welbutrin and Lexapro. The combo kept me from getting depressed, ever. I started WB and was on that only for 2 years. My hyper sexuality was still present, I was pushing the boundaries or what I wanted to do when I was manic and then I would feel horrible shame when i came down from those states. My ex wife also made sure I never forgot the things I did that made me feel shame. I'll say I NEVER wanted to cheat or involve other people in our sex life, I just wanted to do things with my wife that, when I was normal or down I would never want to do.

So after requesting and doing things that she felt to be horrible I got on another med. Lexapro. It stopped the desire to push sexual boundaries because, well... it stopped the desire to have sex at all.

So on that combo I sill had mood swings, still had racing thoughts, still terrible impulse control. But it was enough to keep me from getting depressed and it just so happened to kill my sex drive so my 'worst' manic episodes were at bay as well.

I am not really sure why I went on that tangent other than I am kind of realizing this all within the last few days. My GP was dumb enough to luck into a combo that kept me from my worst highs (which I rather enjoyed when I was in them) and depression.

To me this is true of antidepressive agents. Prozac makes me FEEL better but does not change who I am. Of antimanic agents, the opposite is true: they make me a better person while not necessarily making me FEEL better.

Does it make any sense?

I don't think bad behaviour due to manic actions make you a bad person. I think anti-mania meds make your actions more appropriate tho.

Medications do not control you, medications are YOUR tools. With medications, your realm of control over your you increases. You have more, not less, control over yourself with medications, which expand your toolkit. Your particular medications do not seem to make a difference, but that is another story.

Meds are like make-up - and this comes from someone who would love to use make-up but does not have the dexterity for it. Make-up has the potential of enhancing the looks of many people, though not all. If you are skillful with it and have taste, you can do wonders. If you overuse etc. you will spoil the look.

Robert: When I went to the pdoc I told him "No meds. I'm not compliant with meds, the only one I was ever compliant with was welbutrin. So if you do think I need meds then I'm willing to take welbutrin." After he laughed a little he told me that he will never give me welbutrin because of my history of anorexia . Most pdocs are NOT okay with eating disorder patients on any meds that contain a lack of appetite side effect. I know that is why I can't have it but doesn't mean it's not an option for you.

hamster-bamster: Thanks that is exactly what I mean stated better. Some anti-manics make me feel like I'm just holding my tongue, so I refuse those. Only 2 anti depressants have helped me so far neither I can take

Trippin2.0: It does when your a protectionist and /or you have no idea between your manic and normal.

I beg to differ. I don't for a minute believe that your actions due to an illness MAKE you a bad person. You either are or you're not. BUT... If you are inclined to believe so badly about yourself, that's you're prerogative.

Is anyone here non-compliant in favour of meds?

My pdoc recently increased my AD - he had brought it down to see if I could manage on a lower dose and I wasn't doing well. He said he would leave it there for a bit to clear the depression but then bring it down mid-way again between the too-low and the current dose.

But the thing is I am feeling good now - NOT hypo but good. Normal (for me). And I don't really want to go down a notch. I felt a bit flat on the mid-way dose.

I can see myself staying on this dose even if he says to go down. I have enough pills.

Did anyone ever 'disobey' their pdoc in favour of taking more meds? Again, I'm not talking about inducing a hypo or drug-shopping here. Just not following instructions - not dramatically, but a bit.

Sorry, I realise I may have de-railed the thread with that post.

To the OP, if it is a case of forgetting (which it doesn't seem to be) I second what others have said. I have sometimes forgotten, but very rarely. I use a pillbox which I refill weekly and it is in the kitchen for morning and evening. It's part of my routine now.

If it's a case of resisting being medicated then I can't really identify, I'm afraid. I've never had any issue with taking the tablets and am completely neutral on the issue of being medicated. It doesn't really make any difference to me, in the sense that I don't find them intrusive and I don't feel controlled. I take them because they help me and I don't really think about it any further than that (in a larger sense - I realise my other post might suggest otherwise).

I'm not sure if you have always been non-compliant...? Could it be that you've never experienced any benefit, because you've not taken them for any length of time and therefore you're not persuaded that there's any point? Of course, if you don't agree with the concept at all, then this doesn't apply.

Good luck with figuring it out!

Thought about it... almost cried when I was taken off celexa

always been non-compliant...? Except when I was on welbutrin or celexa/lamictal combo.

you've not taken them for any length of time and therefore you're not persuaded that there's any point?

I think it's partly because this is the first time i have had any positive effects, that I have felt, family has said there were results on other ones. All other ones I felt like I was forced to take.

It makes me hungry,which is not cool!! I was complying great until pdoc switched my AD. Plus any meds make me nauseous because I took so many diet pills when I was younger and Od'd once

Seems like you have many reasons to associate meds with bad experiences. Maybe if this one is having some positive effects and you stick with it long enough you will be able to 're-write' the script in your head? Assuming you are fine with the idea of meds in the first place, of course.

I was non compliant because I was afraid of meds. Then they gave me an anxiety med and it helped so then I got my pill box and set it up. Now that I'm organized and not afraid I do awesome.

It also helps that if I want any kind of life with having epilepsy I *have* to comply.

-Mandy

I know this might be offensive I'll erase it if it is.. but with meds I try to treat it like epilepsy because my mood swings seem to scare the **** out of anyone (my son) around as much as a grand mal seizure would. I've seen the same look of concern towards me as my friend after a seizure. that's why I'm trying to comply.

Actions, yes, but also thoughts. I to like though the position that bad behavior due to manic actions do not make me a bad person.

I am non-compliant sometimes. I have an alarm set on my phone to remind me when to take my meds. It goes off and I think, time to take my meds! So I turn off the alarm. If I don't take my meds right right there, then I forget. My husband also helps remind me to take them. When I don't take them, it becomes really obvious.

A form of the type I'm illustrating below will get you in compliance within a week if
you have it handy before you brush your teeth in the morning and the last thing you do at night before going to bed. It becomes routine, keeps you stable with
dosages, and lets the med do its work without interruption. You need only to accept that they are essential for some in treating bipolar illness.

Try typing a form with date in one column, A.M. P.M. in the next two columns, and
a blank space for you to check the medication you took. Hang it inside a bathroom
cabinet with rubber cement (so it's easy to remove for the next month's form).

Make your form for one month; keep a blank form in your computer so that you may print a new copy for the next month.

I do this and it looks something like this:

____________________________________________________________________
Month: July
Date__________A.M.meds P.M. meds ______________________________________________________

1______________ Yes ______ Yes________________________________ 2.______________Yes_______Yes____________ ___________________
3_______________Yes_________________________________________
4.___________________________________________________________
5.___________________________________________________________

Etc., through the end of the month
__________________________________________________________
By checking it each morning and each evening when you take your meds, you are totally responsible for your medication.

Isn't it great to be so independent? (Just kidding, of course) but I also keep
a list in the cabinet just above the chart of the meds I should be taking
in the morning and at night. I also keep the meds in a little plastic container
for the A.M. meds and in another container for the P.M. meds.

It gets so organized that you never forget to take them after about one week
of following your schedule on the inside of a bathroom cabinet.

Hope this helps.

Genetic

P.S. I use a software program called "Formtool 7" which makes creating a form a snap. (Available on the internet; I'm sure there are others just as good, but Formtool is so easy to install and use for me.)

I am non-complaint with my meds because I forget. I think what you people are saying about only treating one side of the bipolar is really stupid. Treating only the depression can cause more mania and only treating the mania can cause more depression. You may not see it but in some way you are causing problems for yourself when you are in mania.Whether it be your talking to fast or you are spending money without realizing it or you are having sex with lots of partners. I agree with the person who said you need to find a reason to take them. My reason for getting back on mine tonight is because I want to be back with my ex but he will not take me back til I am back on the meds and on them reguarlly. You talk about possibly losing your son if you are not on your meds maybe that needs to be your reason for taking them. I am not trying to be a ***** here but if you love your son you will do what is best for him and you being happy and healthy is best for him. Not having a mother who is not happy and healthy.

TY all. I talked to T about non-compliance yesterday. She REALLY thinks my medication needs to be adjusted but understands the anxiety that comes with that for me. I do write down when I don't take my meds so I may put the why next to it.

I know I'm being sensitive today but " If you love your son you will do what is best for him." can be taken very negatively but maybe it is time to seriously look at hand parenting over to a friend.