[yinyangmama]

I have been a bit hypomanic at work lately and have been overproductive, and doing things I thought I could never do, like organizing large meetings and public speaking. I was just handed a huge promotion/raise and a newly created trainer position about a week ago because of all this. The announcement went out and most of my department (especially the women) are being very cold to me. They all know I was out for "medical issues" a few months back. My coworkers see things that my boss doesn't, like me crying at my desk one day and skipping around the next. I have always been an overachiever, have been with the company for 13 years, have consistently gotten the highest ratings. But I am pretty sure everyone thinks right now that I am just getting special treatment. I know I shouldn't care what they think, I'm just frustrated because I feel like I'm hiding, like what if everyone knew about my bipolar disorder and that I was hospitalized?? I feel kind of guilty for being promoted like it was due to my hypomania, and am also terrified that I will crash and become depressed and/or incapable. I have just gotten straight on my meds so I really hope that doesn't happen. Anyway I feel like a sham and I still feel so sensitive since I am recovering from major depression. Has anyone faced problems like this at work? A couple of ladies have been downright horrible to me because they are jealous. I can't believe the way people treat each other. The whole thing is so aggravating. But of course I am not willing to tell ANYONE what is really wrong with me.

[unaluna]

Remember all the HIPAA paperwork you signed in the hospital? Your health is nobody's business but your own. Manage your moods and enjoy your success. I wish I could have done the same when I was working, instead of acting out all over the place, resulting in all my hard work earning me virtually nothing (a decent disability check, I can't complain, still, a big underachievement). But I am truly happy for you, that meds and the changing times make your success possible.

[BipolaRNurse]

I turned down a huge promotion at work back in December that would have put my salary range in the six figures, for this very reason. I hated to say No because I really would've enjoyed the extra money and the prestige of the job, but I had a horrible feeling that I would have grown very quickly to hate all the travel and the constant change. I was dx'd with BP only a few months later.

((((Ying)))) I echo the other members in their support!

You earned the promotion and owe nobody an explanation. You have worked super hard and are being recognized for your achievements. You may have worked HARDER in fact because you worked soo hard in both your personal AND professional life -and are continuing to do so. That is certainly not an easy thing to do!

I hear your fears and doubts. I dont think that is unusual for ANYONE to get nervous when receiving promotions. It is scary! Afterall, you've been working super hard and now...more pressure! More responsibility! It should be a happy time but for many it is terrifying!

(One time I received a fabulous, but totally unwanted / unexpected promotion and I bawled my eyes out! I didn't want it at all! I wanted to tell the committee "no way!" but I couldn't which made it worse. I ended up sabotaging myself )

If you honor yourself and acknowlege all of your hard work, but dont feel up to the task honor that too! You are the most important thing in this equation xx Definitely a great talking point for your T so you can address all of your feelings concerns and also to focus on the joy of it!

As for the jealous, petty, small minded women in the office...your boss sees that too! They didnt get the accolades for that very reason. Sups arent blind. And look at you holding your head high!

Best wishes and all the best to you
Hugs,
Rose

[cocoabeans]

I suffered a promotion recently. Plenty of jealousy went around and I thought it odd, why be jealous opf me? Though, I realized, superficially, I'd be jealous of me too!

My job offers, promotions, completed education, travel experience, many things occured because of "hypomania" it isn't something to be guilty about. It isn't wrong to be "hypomanic" and if you get the good kind, euphoric, confident, creative, motivated so what??? That part is a gift. The depression is hell but, that doesn't mean we can't take the good with the bad, it doesn't mean we can't take advantage and be "hypomanic" even if it is supposed to be part of an illness.

If we can't use our experiences, what are we to do? Crawl in a hole and live off social assistance while waiting to die?

Even if it is "hypomania" you stil are you. "Bipolar" gave you a boost but, if you weren't intelligent, capable, talented whatever it is that qualifies you, all the "hypomania" in the world wouldn't get you where you are.

Be proud that you're accomplishing something and take the fall back to normalcy as a challenge to move forth and grow as a person both personally and professionally.

As for worrying about people knowing if you have bipolar or not, tell them if you like. I tell people if it comes up and does it upset some more? Do some think I'm even making it up? Yes! But one thing I know is that other people's feelings and opinions, ways of coping what have you, are not my responsibility.

If such and such chooses to be jealous, petty, ignorant or unhappy with something I'm doing right, that's up to them to fix it or suffer the consequences. Take care of yourself.

Enjoy your promotion!

[faerie_moon_x]

I say it is better to be in your position than mine. I foolishly outed myself at work thinking, rather naively, that I have a disability and that if people knew that and I had accomidations, then I could do a better job. All it's earned me is constant extremely poor reviews. (For example, my bosses and HR gave me a 2 out of 5 for customer service skills, but 98% of surveyed patients gave me a 4 or 5....) I've been told I can never receive a promotion, or be moved into a position which may be more beneficial for my health. I am the constant watch list. One mistake when someone is in a bad mood, and I'll be fired.

So let your co-workers be jealous. You've been at the same job for 13 years! That's amazing! Just because you have a health issue doesn't mean you didn't earn your promotion.

[Victoria'smom]

If you have to deal with the negatives of BP, why can't you reap the rewards of your hypomania? It sucks that the stigma is so bad that we tend to try and hide. Try to enjoy this.

[BlueInanna]

((Yinyangmama)) I am so proud of you, congratulations! You are totally capable of doing this, so what if you get depressed & cry sometimes, then skip around exhuberantly the next. Let them talk. And you just keep being strong in knowing who you are, a smart and capable lady! You sound like you're creative and have innovative ideas. And if mood starts to take over, you've got a full toolbox including meds, pdoc, and us

[yinyangmama]

I am so touched by the support on this website that I have tears in my eyes! It's so nice to come hear and have this reinforcement from others who truly understand. Thank you everyone, this boosts my confidence so much (in a healthy way...haha). Huge virtual hugs to all of you!!!

[SevenRabbit]

I agree with Cocoabeans. What you have accomplished, no matter what your mood at the time, was still accomplished by you. Be proud of yourself. Sadly, there will always be people at work who are jealous of you/your position. I'm sure there are many co-workers who are happy for you and glad you received the promotion. Good luck and enjoy the rewards of your hard work!

[fergus]

I've been lucky to have people throughout my work journey that I felt comfortable to confide in. Some were boses, some were just friends. It helps as they can also let you know when they notice changes.