[Hoping4aCure]

I have been treated for bi polar and PTSD since I was a teenager. For years I was able to work and support myself financially; though I always had trouble with personal relationships. This past year my condition worsened and I became disabled. The loss of my independence has been terrible for me and I am still working part time with hopes of being able to work full time again.

The last couple months I have been under tremendous stress- more than ever before.

The problem is a few weeks ago I started hearing voices and began a relationship with a voice I believed to be my teenage child- though I have no children. I have since realized it was just a voice but am grieving the loss of "my child" and being able to talk with him and watch him grow.

My question is does this happen to people with bi polar? Is this typical? Is this a normal progression of the disease and am I likely to continue to get worse as I have the last year?

[A Red Panda]

Hearing voices is a sign of psychosis, which can be present during a full manic episode. I would definitely talk to your pdoc about it!

I can understand how you feel the loss though - I've had a lot of dreams over the years with the same little girl in it... who's always my daughter. I know her name and I know how she looks at acts at various stages in her life (up to about age 8). I haven't dreamed about her for a few years and I miss her, even though I know that she is totally fictional.

[Hoping4aCure]

Thanks, I feel so embarrassed by it all. They changed my meds and gave me latuda and it made the paranoia of being "found out" about him go away. I was sure any minute the police were coming to arrest me for living in some fantasy and I would be committed to a hospital and never get out.

I just wonder if I am getting worse over this last year because now I can't work enough to support myself and I'm hearing voices. I seem to be slipping away into a world out of my control. I'm so worried about it.

[A Red Panda]

Don't be embarrassed! You're being honest with what you are experiencing and that is an excellent way to be, and it's something to admire! A lot of people would keep it to themselves, so I think it's very brave of you to address it.

If you're worried and feel like you're struggling this year... please, contact your pdoc and/or your T and talk to them about it, ok? They'll be able to help you!

[Trippin2.0]

Some people believe it gets worse with time, me? not so much, but I can only speak from my own experience.

What is a definite issue though, stress does exacerbate bipolar symptoms. So the voices and delusions may not neccessarily be about getting worse, but a response to stress.

I've had my worst episodes during natural life stressors. For example, after my brother died, I went nuts. Saw things, had random b1tchfits, public meltdowns, the works. Then just as I got back to "normal" my dad died too... then I unravelled seemingly completely, argued outloud with a myriad of voices, got into trouble at work, pdoc wanted to hospitalize me. Thought I was possessed, scared the shyt out of my child. Just overall crazy acting....

Then I got better and haven't been that bad off since, its been 3 yrs.

So what I'm trying to say is, don't automatically assume the worst. It really could be stress making your bp go haywire.

Reserve judgement for later.

I think the voices are part of auditory hallucinations which are symptoms of psychosis. That could be for a number of reasons, not necessarily because of the progression of bipolar itself, but possibly the progression of a manic or depressive episode or as part of something else, but it is something only you and your dr can figure out. I think it is very important that you speak with your dr very soon about this so that you and he can figure out what to do.

[primetimetush1]

Originally Posted by Hoping4aCure

I have been treated for bi polar and PTSD since I was a teenager. For years I was able to work and support myself financially; though I always had trouble with personal relationships. This past year my condition worsened and I became disabled. The loss of my independence has been terrible for me and I am still working part time with hopes of being able to work full time again.

The last couple months I have been under tremendous stress- more than ever before.

The problem is a few weeks ago I started hearing voices and began a relationship with a voice I believed to be my teenage child- though I have no children. I have since realized it was just a voice but am grieving the loss of "my child" and being able to talk with him and watch him grow.

My question is does this happen to people with bi polar? Is this typical? Is this a normal progression of the disease and am I likely to continue to get worse as I have the last year?

Some get worse over time, others improve, and some don't have as much change in symptom severity. It really varies, depending on a) you/coping strategies, physiology, etc. b) your environmental stressors, and c) your response to medication/other Tx; more treatment resistant (meds don't work) people are obviously less likely to improve. The question of whether bipolar is generally a progressive condition is less well understood. Stress can obviously make symptoms worse, but it's less clear if stress can make people more vulnerable to future episodes (called kindling effect/stress-sensitization). Even less is known about progressive biological changes (e.g., changes in brain function). In the next few decades, scientists will get a clearer understanding of whether bipolar is progressive with longitudinal studies, especially of the brain and physiology - how they change over time.

-No, you're not alone. If you get treated well you'll likely do better. Good luck