now that christmas is over.. how do you all feel?

what happened, laura?

wanna talk about it?

thanks shattered, not really just wanna sleep forever. tried to hurt myself last night. dont wanna take the meds either as whats the point just really low now

Relieved!
I did pretty good, kept a smile, stayed chipper,and said the family prayer for dinner.dang they always get me to do that..Ive had lots of practice,but not here in a while.They say I do the best ones..uuugggg, but it turned out great considering this being our first christmas without Daddy..

Christmas went o.k. We didn't have lots of money to get kids alot of expensive stuff but the inlaws got them cool presents. I had to go to mother inlaws and she drives me nuts so I only stayed for about an hour and came home. The rest of the afternoon spent it sleeping and alone.

All in all not bad but glad its over.

"what does everyone in this family think I'm an effing hippy or something!" ... Whatever!
Blue, I can relate, just because my hair is down to my A__ Ive had people call me a hippi..I just laugh cauze people trying to judge me have no insight and theyr idiots!! I would have to respect that person first in order for thier opinion to matter to me!!

"Told my husband how far we've come. First Christmas together we weren't together, only online talking. Second Christmas together thrown out of house by evil step-biatch and driving to live 900 miles away. Third Christmas together in apartment of no furniture and no presents, just us and new baby (now 6 years old,) and used last money to buy dollar menu from Jack in Box for dinner. Fourth Christmas had money and first time had "Christmas" and then every year until this year, now thrown out of house again by same step-biatch but this time have a job and money and able to do our own Christmas and was best one ever..... Eight years later we have come so far."

My estranged Daughter put it as "Be True To Thine Own Self" there's alot of wisdom in those words..



__________________

I was quite tired from lots of driving to get to family for Christmas. Stayed with In-laws which was ok but a bit stressful. The actual day was good but tiring - to much small talk with relatives. Glad to be back home and have my house tidied up after all the presents cluttering up everywhere.

The good old holiday hangover, hooray! I tried to analogize my christmas misadventures to scenes from Home Alone, especially the scene where Kevin tries to be responsible and goes grocery shopping, but the bags break on the way home. When my bags broke, instead of a Macaulay Culkin smirk, my bipolar mind kicked in.

It stuttered: "Is this finally it? Can I stop worrying about losing it, and just lose it? I could just punt that smug eggnog carton clear across the street, leave this crap in the gutter, replace dinner with cigarettes, and spend all night predicting the real-world effectiveness of Home Alone boobytraps by crossing a physics analysis with predictive psychology. Whoa, what? No, breathe and slowly pick up that carton, slowly… slowly."

You know. I put the rest on my blog, as I can't embed movie screen shots in here! (in signature)