[well]

I have a husband who doesn't talk and have become afraid of letting people into my life, so I keep the TV on to have the illusion of a verbal life. I worry when I start talking to the TV, which I usually refrain from doing. The only person I share my reality with is my therapist and it ticks me off that I have to pay for conversation that is related to the most intrusive part of my life. How do I get out?

[faerie_moon_x]

I also don't really like silence and keep the t.v. on. Even if I don't watch it, the background noise... it's just something that calms me, I guess. I don't talk to the t.v. but I talk to Other Me.... which is like some other part of me, I guess, that I talk to and talks back.

Hi Well

I have never been able to take siting in silence. The static in my head is there and I hear every little noise around me, which keeps me from getting anything done. I work best with music on, not because I really listen closely to what is playing, but I know it blocks all of the chaotic random noises from distracting my mind. If I'm reading on my iPad, the TV is usually on for the very same reasons.

If I sit in a silent room with my wife, the anxiety builds because I'm supposed to come up with some magical meaningful topic to discuss. The static in my own mind makes this almost impossible. If I say something just to break the ice, it usually will not go well.

It is so difficult to converse with a thousand possible topics and no parameters in place to guide you with all of the static in a quiet room.

[faerie_moon_x]

Another thing, is when it's quiet too long, it triggers my pressured speach. So I start talking and I don't want to be talking.... it's annoying.

my pressured speech

Finally a way to describe what I feel. This Pressured Speech NEVER goes well for me, so it ends badly if I don't speak and ends badly when I do speak. Yuck...

Thank you, Dark Heart X

[faerie_moon_x]

Sure.

Pressured speach is one of my primary mania symptoms, actually. That with the racing thoughts.

Originally Posted by dark_heart_x

Sure.

Pressured speach is one of my primary mania symptoms, actually. That with the racing thoughts.

Racing thoughts is something I know all too well... What good are they when you have 746 thoughts spinning through your mind and you choose the wrong one?

Most people don't understand and let you re-phase. I usually just get a comment like "That's what You said!"

My Adderall has sure helped in this regard, but the situation still triggers my anxiety.

[rossiv46]

Im sorry your going thru that with your husband. I too hate silence and whenn alone i have to have t.v. on to keep me company. I also get pressured speech with mania.
Hope things get better.

[faerie_moon_x]

Oh yeah, I can say things and not remember what I said, and then people get mad at me because I said the wrong thing... that makes sense to me! That's why I like typing... can go back and delete before you show anyone.

As for the t.v., though.... that's a hard one. Have youd discussed with your therapist that you actually talk to the t.v. I think the big question is if you think they are actually talking to you? I think that is the red flag you're looking for, and if that's not the case, it's more a symptom of loneliness. Like... yelling at the coach when your sports team is doing bad is pretty normal, I think. Or like saying "Don't go in that house! He's waiting for you!" during a suspensful part of a show or whatever, that's totally normal. But thinking your favorite sitcom characters are actually talking to you is more something to talk about with the therapist.

i hate silence too.

like dark heart, i usually have the tv on too... even if it's something i really hate.

i need the noise

[Miss Laura]

How about a befriending service? Volunteering? A hobby that would get you interacting with other people?