[spoiltmom]

Or close to it? Right now I have so many highs and lows. One week I'm friendly and outgoing, the next I can't even leave my house.

Right now I stay home with my kids but is there ever hope of me going back to work and being able to function normally?

[bpinOk]

What I "normal" to you?

[spoiltmom]

I don't know. I guess not bouncing between two extremes constantly

[bpinOk]

I wish for the same thing as well... My T seems to think its possible but will take hard work

Yes, if that's your meaning of "normal", you should be able to avoid the extremes of
bipolar illness even in a worst case scenario. If you take control of your illness (by correcting a faulty diet, if there is one, maintaining good levels of high quality vitamin and mineral supplements, you may even be unaware that you have an illness.)

It takes your pro-active effort to help the illness go into remission.

We've questioned your meaning of "normal" because there really is no such thing. It's just a term used to describe a different form of behavior or feeling tone.

I would venture to say that a good psychiatrist can find something really wrong in almost everyone if he looks hard enough and closely enough. Did you know that only 7% of bipolar patients ever seek help for their illness? That leaves 93% of bipolar patients untreated for a lifetime. How unnecessary, when a teaspoon of medication can stabilize a chemical imbalance!

Take heart, you'll be better very soon.

[spoiltmom]

Also I have heard people say that I am strange. They think I'm strange because I act so different at times. If I'm up I act one way, if I'm down I act another, if I'm agitated I act evenly differently. Will that get better also?

[Clinte89]

It is possible I'm currently stable and had been for two months now. It took med changes and ect and lots of therapy to get here but it's worth it. So yes you can be normal at some point.

[hamster-bamster]

Yes. But I am lucky - the oldest psychiatric med takes care of most of it for me. Plus a host of other non-pharmacological things, of course. I am actually able to function in the most boring job possible, so I view it as a big achievement in stability. If you can return to a job that is engaging, challenging, and a little bit creative, but not too stressful and with reasonable hours, that alone would help move you towards stability.

[hamster-bamster]

Originally Posted by spoiltmom

Also I have heard people say that I am strange. They think I'm strange because I act so different at times. If I'm up I act one way, if I'm down I act another, if I'm agitated I act evenly differently. Will that get better also?

Yes, with a mood stabilizer. You want the right medicine and the right amount of it so it would smooth out the highest and lowest edges while leaving you as you, as a human being.

[charo224488]

You may never feel 'normal', because once you have a diagnosis you know that you are different. Don't think of it as different in a bad way, think of it as special. You have thoughts and ideas that no one else has. You are capable of anything. Normal is over-rated! Good luck!

[bluemountains]

If you are seeing your pdoc regularly, eventually, after adjustments, you should feel stable, or in other words, your definition of normal. As for the worry that people say you are strange, this may be a case a paranoia. During a period of my treatments with pdoc I had to ask a coworker to monitor my behaviors and let me know if I was being too extreme in any area.
Don't give up. Drug combinations take a while to determine what works best.
Bliuemountains

[hamster-bamster]

Originally Posted by bluemountains

If you are seeing your pdoc regularly, eventually, after adjustments, you should feel stable, or in other words, your definition of normal. As for the worry that people say you are strange, this may be a case a paranoia. During a period of my treatments with pdoc I had to ask a coworker to monitor my behaviors and let me know if I was being too extreme in any area.
Don't give up. Drug combinations take a while to determine what works best.
Bliuemountains

What an excellent insight. OP, you might be overreacting to people's comments. Sort of Making a mountain out of a molehill (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Make_a_..._of_a_molehill) - a typical mistake of people when they are ill.

And in general people trust the validity of negative comments and distrust that of positive comments, without questioning. This is true of many well people and especially true of mentally ill people.

[BipolaRNurse]

Originally Posted by charo224488

You may never feel 'normal', because once you have a diagnosis you know that you are different. Don't think of it as different in a bad way, think of it as special. You have thoughts and ideas that no one else has. You are capable of anything. Normal is over-rated! Good luck!

You nailed it! "Normality" is subjective anyway.....what your kind of normal is may not be mine, and vice-versa. And that's OK.

You're also spot on about what happens when one is confirmed to have a mental illness......there is no way to unring the bell, no way to go back to life before the diagnosis. That was the part I struggled with for the better part of a year after my own dx, and even when I go for awhile without thinking about it, the disappointment is always ready to rush back in when I remember that I have bipolar, and it's NOT going away.

[cocoabeans]

Im surprised no one has brought up feeling abnormal on medications. One reason I am not on any now and refuse to be on any long term is that this "stability" thing doesn't feel normal. It gets to a point where something in my brain is being dragged down the stable road kicking and screaming, ripped apart at 100 km/hr on a leash of the medication vehicle. Like I need to be depressed or "manic" not just a little down or up, I need to have a full on crazy spell or I won't feel normal. I won't feel right so, my approach now is come crawling back in crisis if I need to but face that bipolar ***** head on.

Or in simple terms as a clinical psychologist once explained to me, people with bipolar disorder often feel restless and unsure of what to do with themselves once stable. He was going to help me with that but, I didn't like his attitude. He called me bipolar but no buddy, I'm a person with a bipolar diagnosis!

[Victoria'smom]

I've been told I will have to learn to cope with my "new" limitations even with medication.

[venusss]

Originally Posted by cocoabeans

Im surprised no one has brought up feeling abnormal on medications. One reason I am not on any now and refuse to be on any long term is that this "stability" thing doesn't feel normal. It gets to a point where something in my brain is being dragged down the stable road kicking and screaming, ripped apart at 100 km/hr on a leash of the medication vehicle. Like I need to be depressed or "manic" not just a little down or up, I need to have a full on crazy spell or I won't feel normal. I won't feel right so, my approach now is come crawling back in crisis if I need to but face that bipolar ***** head on.

Or in simple terms as a clinical psychologist once explained to me, people with bipolar disorder often feel restless and unsure of what to do with themselves once stable. He was going to help me with that but, I didn't like his attitude. He called me bipolar but no buddy, I'm a person with a bipolar diagnosis!

tom wooton (Bipolar Advantage blog here in Psychcentral) talks for this.

I think unless meds erase your memories of feeling... no, they cannot reset you to "normal". But screw, "normal", if you feel comfortable in your skin and can turn down your crazy for the world... you will not long for "normal" anymore. I think longing for "normal" and hoping it comes in a pill is symptom of not liking yourself. Once you learn to accept who you are... highs and lows get easier, I think