[BlueInanna]

This is me being silly to mask my utter madness chaos in my mind. Plus I want to try to make a poll, I've never done it, and this may not even work.

I vote for the last option. Always a better choice!!

[BlueInanna]

LOL Butterfly!

It's just too tempting - I have son's court in a little over an hour, he's not even awake yet. Calgon!!!! Take me away!!!!! How will I make it through this day? The minutes don't slow down for anybody.

I'll have to wait till after court for the joint.

[Clinte89]

Yeah showing up high is probably not the best idea. But smoke em if you got em.

You can make it! No need to waste on paranoia in the court.

[BlueInanna]

Do you think if I went in SUPER HIGH (on pot of course), I could get them to take me instead of him??

[faerie_moon_x]

I don't think they will take you instead. They might just take both of you. That's not good.

Just remember you're not alone in that court room. We're all there with you in spirit, okay. All us aliens and fairies and unicorns and monkies and whatever else we happen to be today.

[Clinte89]

Dark heart said it well we are all pulling for you. Hang in there blue it'll work itself out.

Dong Dong Dong. . .
Don't smoke a nasty cigarette! Please don't! Instead, smoke a joint or take some Benadryl and go to bed. Or Xanax. Or muscle relaxers. Anything but vicodin!

[Anika.]

I dont know Blue. Sometimes smokes make it feel like they are releaving the anxiety, in actuallity smoking usually increases anxiety. I always get lost on that and yeah I still smoke.

We are all there with you. Could you do some breathing or something, creating breath rather than taking it away might work better. Maybe talk to your daughters ganesha or the green lady. Maybe take ganesha along in your pocket or purse as well as all of us. Remember what he represents.

It will be, it is something that has to happen, I know it must feel extremly scary. Maybe it will be a turning point. We can only hope that some good comes out of the bad. But we are present with you in spirit.

Do what you need to do to get through this day. ((((BLUE))))) I voted smoke as much as you
want because a joint before court probably is not good all things considered. And because I have faith that you woukd make reasonable choices and not really go back to full fledge smoking.

I understand the masking right now. You will get through this.

It's only my opinion, but I think that if a cigarette is what you need, then you should have it.

[manicminer]

Upon discharge from the p-ER, I asked my p-doc, for my mother's sake (mainly bc she was standing there) if I should try to give up tobacco use. To my astonishment and to my mother's disgust, he said, "I never recommend my patients try to quit smoking, at least right away. Its just too good of a mood stabilizer."

I smoke, use smokeless tobacco (chew, dip, snuff, whatever you may call it), and even dabble in dry tobacco (inhaled through the nose or rubbed on the gums). All to get that fix of either alertness and focus, or relaxation and calmness, depending on the dose and/or delivery method.

[BlueInanna]

Well... I went with smoke as much as I want lol. At least it made my son laugh when he was out having his and saw me "Mom wtf are you doing?!?! You look so silly smoking."

I will quit asap, maybe I'll just have my relapse for a few days though. And I think I'll have a joint later as well if I can find some papers.

I made the poll so you could choose more than 1 option btw So my opinion would be All of the above.

[~Christina]

I'll toss my 2cents in ...

I have/had asthma really bad and still smoked, yeah almost 4 years ago I saw a new Pulmonary doc. We sat down and talked about my problems and what meds I had tried or were taking. Of course he finally asked me if I wanted to quit.... Of course I wanted to,, but hell its hard. He told me something I will never forget and have used the same thinking process with other parts of my life.

" smokers have a cig and it relaxes them ( of course ) part is the flood of nicotine but the bigger part is the slow deep breathing you do as you smoke"
He said every time you smoke a cig you are already setting yourself for yet another frantic need/ anxiety for another cig to relieve the stress that builds from the last cig you had, So your in part causing yourself/body to stress out 20 + times a day"

I have never forgotten what he said, I did quit a couple months later, no it wasnt always easy and I would often hold an unlite cig ... I was able to get off all my asthma meds, I dont cough every morning, I am not always getting a cold or bronchititis etc.

Anyway... Just thought I would share this info.

Oh yeah ! I saved an insane amount of money !!! I am pretty certain it would be cheaper to smoke pot occassionally.

Blue

[BlueInanna]

I have no business smoking, my dad died of lung cancer...

Guy's almost here to take me out to dinner, and I'm trying to figure out if I have time to go sneak a smoke, then wash my hands, brush my teeth, spray something on my hair so I don't smell of it. That's f'ed up! Addicting things make me act in a way I don't like and wouldn't normally do.

Yet here I go, I think I can do it in time. So lame. Oh well. I'm aware it's lame.

[manicminer]

Originally Posted by BlueInanna

I have no business smoking, my dad died of lung cancer...

Guy's almost here to take me out to dinner, and I'm trying to figure out if I have time to go sneak a smoke, then wash my hands, brush my teeth, spray something on my hair so I don't smell of it. That's f'ed up! Addicting things make me act in a way I don't like and wouldn't normally do.

Yet here I go, I think I can do it in time. So lame. Oh well. I'm aware it's lame.

At least you're aware, as am I. Gross, disgusting, filthy habit comes to mind too. And my mother's favorite comments when around me: "You smell like smoke!" and "Get that S@#T outta your mouth!"

[BlueInanna]

It is gross disgusting! But here I go to sneak it again... I thought he was asleep and hence to converse with myself as usual when by myself he says "I'm starting to think u might really be crazy". ..... Well no duh u stupid fricken simpleton with IQ of 50. .. But hey sushi was delicious. I like dinner.... Ok just going for it now, sneak a smoke under the full ish moon. I think he's asleep whatever I'm an aware loserosasita.

[BlueInanna]

I want a hot tub

Originally Posted by BlueInanna

This is me being silly to mask my utter madness chaos in my mind. Plus I want to try to make a poll, I've never done it, and this may not even work.

C...your poll is somewhat hilarious I'm sorry I know you are in pain but you have this sneaky comedic gift all awesome!

let your happy little lungs stay all happy ok....

they love you too

you light us up instead!....

[venusss]

do not attempt to quit in stressful situation... it will do you no good.

[BlueInanna]

So hey I didn't end up having that midnight smoke, nor the joint, and haven't smoked yet today. I'm kind of proud of myself.

[Clinte89]

The joints ok stay away from those nasty cigarettes though

[Anika.]

I think the less vices maybe the better including pot and the thick smoke from it as well. Yes that is just my opinion. You did good Blue, proud of you too!!! I need to keep trying. But you give me hope that I can do it too! I haven't given up hope that I can, didn't find it either yet.. suppose I should actually look for it or the strength, it must be here somewhere.

[BlueInanna]

Quitting takes practice, relapse is part of recovery (so they say), take it easy

[Dragonfly33]

It takes an average of 7 tries to quit smoking. I think this is my 5th try. I haven't had a cigarette since early December. I quit counting how many days since I haven't smoked, I quit thinking about it. Thinking about quitting made me think about smoking (if that makes sense). My Dad has COPD now and I learned it's a slow, painful, death. I don't want COPD. Keep trying! You can do it!