[Melmo]

I'm dating a guy that I've known for 4 years. We dated in the winter if 08/09 and stopped talking. I met my daughters dad after that and we split January 2011. I started dating the first guy in may of 2012 and I broke it off that July due to mood swings and isolating myself, which I tend to do a lot. In October he messages me on Facebook saying he missed me and wanted to try again. I agreed and we've been dating since.
Hensent me a message about 45 minutes ago wantin to know if I thought we were working out, because we only see each other twice a week.(due to our work schedules, plus we don't live all that close to each other and neither of us has a car)
I texted back saying I thought we were but that I was happy with 2 days a week because I need my space (I feel smothered if we spend too much time together, I have anxiety when we spend time together and even those 2 days per week I sometimes wish he wouldn't come over.) but I know he would much rather spend more time that that. I said its up to him.
I haven't gotten a response back. On one hand I hope this is the end because its an excuse to keep isolating myself and to be alone, but on the other hand it makes me wonder..."did I do something wrong?" Or "is he not attracted to me anymore?" "Doesnit have to do eith my almost non existant desire for sex?" And "did he meet someone else?" I just feel really insecure.
I'm supposed to go to bed right now (making myself go to bed at 9 so I'm not sleep deprived, I normally go to bed anytime between 11 pm and 1am and I'm hoping more sleep will help my mood) but there's no way I can go to bed until I know what's going on!

[manicminer]

As a guy, my best theory is that he is weighing his options right now. You'll hear from him when he has made his decision.

I'm a firm believer in "once an ex, always an ex." There was a problem the first time around that caused the relationship to fail, and its bound to happen again.

I'm a needy guy. The lack of time together and lack of sex would be turnoffs for me, but each guy has different preferences.

Best wishes and good luck.

[Clinte89]

Best wishes but Im with miner on this one. But Im also a needy guy which is why me and my girl split she didnt want me around often and I wanted to be around often. I am basically saying it seems like he is thinking about it. But Im not expert so dont take my word.

[BlueInanna]

Ask him ?

[Melmo]

I just want it to be over at this point, it's almost a relief so I can just be alone. Maybe Minot meant to be in a relationship,I'm too used to being alone. I texted him again today and I didn't get a response back and it's been about 8 hours...ugh I hate this. Remind me next time I cen think about being in a rlelationship....don't even think about it.

[manicminer]

Originally Posted by JustWantToBeNormal

I just want it to be over at this point, it's almost a relief so I can just be alone. Maybe Minot meant to be in a relationship,I'm too used to being alone. I texted him again today and I didn't get a response back and it's been about 8 hours...ugh I hate this. Remind me next time I cen think about being in a rlelationship....don't even think about it.

Now, now; don't give up hope just yet. Believe me, I know its hard finding someone who is willing to tolerate you and love you for who you are and all that you are.

Many have tried, so far all have failed with me. I just eventually become too much for them to handle. But I havent given up. This latest one is the strongest by far, and Im hoping for the best for it to work out. Fingers crossed...

[beadlady29]

beads just want to say we sorry things is so hard rite now.........other then that we really dont have a good anser....beads not real good in teh relatoinship dept. neither................but our heart does go out to u and if u need someone to talk to we hear far u we will lissen anytiem...............
hug far u,
mary sue & all of us beadiies

[treehugger727]

I think that miner has the right idea. Sometimes you just never know and it would be an awful shame to miss that opportunity because your mind was already made up.

In the mean time... That does suck. I hate waiting. Grrr. Especially for a response in this type of situation. I'm sure that the guys are right and he's just sleeping on it... Maybe you should too.

Good luck. Hugs.

"Anger is the ultimate destroyer of your own peace of mind." Dalai Lama

[BlueInanna]

I often think it's better to isolate and be alone, but also I would like someone to spend time with... Relationships are so confusing and loving a bp partner is probably not easy. But he sounds to really care for you from different times you've talked about him. Might be worth the discussion with him at least before deciding?

[newtus]

2x a week is A LOT in my opinion but i also like to extremely isolate.

but i learned most people like to be basically bound to the hip. i cant stand that crap.

[Melmo]

Originally Posted by newtus

2x a week is A LOT in my opinion but i also like to extremely isolate.

but i learned most people like to be basically bound to the hip. i cant stand that crap.

That's how I feel. I know he wants to settle down and have a family and he's even talked about us moving in together, not now but in the future if we were to work out. He is a nice guy but I am nowhere near ready for that and I don't want to waste his time and hold him back from meeting someone who can really give him what he wants. He doesn't need to deal with someone like me.