[gammachris]

I've slept poorly for the past 2 weeks, and I've been rapid cycling for the past two days. I know the drill, and we're working on it.

Four years out from a nasty divorce after a pretty terrible 20-year marriage, I've met a lovely man. I had no plans to date again EVER, and was fine with that. Then I meet this fantastic guy, in the dairy section of my local grocery store. He's kind, patient and calm. He treats me beautifully, and makes me want to make him as happy as he's making me. My extremely protective family and friends are getting very fond of him, and see the same things in him that I do.

So I like this man enough that I'm having second thoughts about saddling him with me. He knows that I'm bipolar, and I've talked to him some about what that means in the context of who I am. However, that's a whole different thing than actually living with it firsthand. I'm doing incredibly well since my divorce. I haven't been hospitalized since, and I'm down to only Lithium right now. I've lost 50 pounds, and my life has improved beyond belief. However, bipolar is a forever thing. And I'm afraid of making things hard on him. And I'm afraid of falling on love, and then having him walk away because he can't take it anymore (not that I'd blame him.) I feel like damaged goods.

[dragonfly2]

How has he been during your rapid cycling? If he seems to be handling it well and has been supportive, I think you've got a good one on your hands and it may be worth taking the risk and letting him in. You sound like you're trying to manage the bipolar responsibly and that can make all the difference in people's eyes.

[newtus]

how do people meet in grocery stores??? secret?

[avlady]

Sounds like positive thing, if he can get to know you as time goes by he may be a keeper!!!!!!!

[roads]

This is a man of fairly normal intelligence? If so, then he knew or has since learned a bunch about bipolarity. We never know how anything's going to work out, whenever we get out of bed or walk out the door. gammachris, I'm 66 and a bipolar alcoholic. The HR dept at work has cause me more problems that either mental illness.
You're down to lithium on your meds? You've lost 50 lbs? You're family's supportive of you & this relationship? And now you've got us?!
Go for it, kiddo. Take a deep breath, post here a lot, love your wonderful family even more, and get to know this man.

Dairy always has been my favorite Food Group !

roadie

[bos314489]

I am in the same situation as you although I have not told the guy I am seeing I am bipolar as it is too early on in the relationship but how did you tell him and what was his reaction? How long were you dating before you told him? He sounds like a great guy. I would go for it.

[faerie_moon_x]

I say that you're approving of him, your family is approving of him, he's a good guy, and that's hard to find. And, you're both full grown adults with a lot of experience to work with in a relationship.

I say don't run away from this. Take it slow and steady, perhaps, but don't run away.

[Clinte89]

Being a guy, a good one btw. I say go for it if he really cares about you bipolar will be the last thing on his mind, if he sees the real you and likes it. Go ahead and jump in.

[hamster-bamster]

I knew loving dairy would eventually pay off!

Congratulations - keep relating but maybe wait a little bit between merging households.

[BipolaRNurse]

Originally Posted by gammachris

So I like this man enough that I'm having second thoughts about saddling him with me. He knows that I'm bipolar, and I've talked to him some about what that means in the context of who I am. However, that's a whole different thing than actually living with it firsthand. I'm doing incredibly well since my divorce. I haven't been hospitalized since, and I'm down to only Lithium right now. I've lost 50 pounds, and my life has improved beyond belief. However, bipolar is a forever thing. And I'm afraid of making things hard on him. And I'm afraid of falling on love, and then having him walk away because he can't take it anymore (not that I'd blame him.) I feel like damaged goods.

I don't know if this will be helpful, but here goes.

GO FOR IT.

It can work. There are some incredibly decent men out there, and if one of them loves you, he'll stick with you through thick and thin, sunshine and sorrow........manic and depressed. I know. I'm living proof.

Many years ago, I found a guy just like this fellow you're talking about. Neither of us knew I was bipolar then, but he did know that I was both mercurial and wildly creative; that I could be a passionate hot mamma and a she-demon on wheels; that I would turn out to be both a comfort and a torment.

And he's still with me, loving me after 33 years.

Don't let this chance for happiness get away. He wants you, bipolar and all, and you'd kick yourself for the rest of your life if you didn't allow his love in.

I know, pretty sappy, but it IS Valentine's Day and I adore a good love story. I hope yours has a happy ending!

[hamster-bamster]

That was the best Valentine's Day read.

[Bipolar mom]

Some men are very compassionate and understanding. Take my father for example... My mothers moodswings can make her very difficult to be around sometimes, but he is so kind and patient with her, they've been married 27 years. He has always did his best by me too.

Don't worry about bringing him down, he may be much stronger than you think. Do what will make you happy, and if he makes you happy then you should be together

[~Christina]

Finding love is a beautiful thing. No guarantees in this life . Go for it