if your reading this now
I want to say goodbye
I won't question your decision
and I won't be asking you why

I just wanted to drop a line
hoping these words find you
cuz you never said goodbye
and that's something I need to do

So goodbye my friend James
I hope that life treats you well
and that it brings you good things
I guess only time will tell

and I won't forget you
and the genius words that you found
I hope you find that peace
and that you are safe and sound

I just wish you were here
to tell you face to face
goodbye......
and please don't forget this place....

cuz I will be here
waiting for you
landskaperdan@gmail.com is the address
if that's something you choose to do...

you can text me too
480-718-5646
whatsapp works too
I hope it's something that you do

cuz I don't want you to stay out of touch
I don't want you to be gone
all of this feels kind of empty
It all feels really wrong

you never even said goodbye
that would have meant a lot
but that is ok and I understand
these demons you must have fought

I almost left too
I get it, I do

just know that you are a friend
and my friend I am here for you
just use the numbers or the email
I get them all day... so please do

it would mean a lot to me
to not lose touch with you...

I've written a hundred goodbyes
and not many have made it through
cuz how can I say what I want to say
when I know they won't find you...

goodbye is such a common phrase
it means that two have parted ways
I want to say much more than this
I want to say it's you I will miss

I guess it's implied
by saying goodbye

I guess this is it
and I should stop throwing this fit

but I am angry
at the whole situation
that led you to leave
such agitation

I know it's not healthy
to go on like this

but damnit man
you just can't leave us, not like this!

Dude! Really!!?? That's just it then? Yeah, I'm angry. I'm angry that this place is triggering for you. I'm angry that I feel I just lost a good friend. I'm angry cuz I'm hurt.

I'm 34 years old. I guess this is a lesson to deal with those issues that I have with abandonment. In a lot of ways I am still childish.

I guess I should thank you for bringing these issues to light so I can work on them.

and in other ways I should be thankful for what I learned from you.

but damnit! I didn't even get to say goodbye! that really, really sux for me.

you might not even know it, but you do a great, great thing for this place. You touched a lot of people! a lot of us look up to you.