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#1
Apr 04, 2013, 06:22 PM
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So my Drug and Alcohol 1 on 1 counselor has perty much become my therapist (she is already). We made a bit of a breakthrough today.
The explained different family dynamics and a different way we think. The framework of thinking includes: -Adult: Logic and Reason -Nurturing Parent : Emotion, Love, Care, Kindness -Critical Parent: Strictness, Overbearance, Discipline -Happy Child: Fun, play, laughter, goofy -Hurt Child: Fear, anxiety, dispair, low self esteem, low self worth, introverted The experiences of my childhood, according to her, have me constantly thinking from the hurt child prospective. This causes me to beat myself up about stuff, dwell on past errors and mistakes, and bottle up everything. She said you need to clear out all that anger, hurt, resentment, and everything you've been bottling up for the past 15 years. She gave me a gift. Simple written on a piece of construction paper: STOP IT! This is to remind myself to stop thinking like the hurt child and saying: -I'm stupid -Look what you've done/ How could you have? -You're rediculous And replace those thoughts with those of the adult (The Truth) -I'm not stupid. I graduated highschool with a 4.11 GPA -I made a mistake. Everyone makes them. -I am redicoulous, but only sometimes. Everyone is rediculous sometimes. She also said I need to give myself permission to stand up for myself and let others know how they way they are treating me makes me feel. More or less, its time to man up. TO stop thinking like that chubby little 4th grader with glasses that gets picked on every day, and let the world know that I'm now a successful, strong, intelligent adult that can't just be walked over or beaten down. I about cried. She also asked if I had a picture of myself as the kid I so often think like. I immediately thought of the pic with me and my Scout buddies. I've got a massive smile on my face and its not manufactured, but a smile of true childhood happiness. She said to get it and keep it with me to remind myself of how happy I once was and can be again, if I try. Just really felt like sharing. Thanks for reading. If anyone else has some helpful hints on how I can start thinking like the man I have become, please feel free to share. 
__________________
BIG changes on the horizon  Hopin' it all goes well... Oxcarbazepine: 300mg 2x/day Fish Oil, Vitamin D3, Magnesium, Lipitor, BEta-Blocker |
 anonymous8113, BlueInanna, bluemountains, kindachaotic, thebelljar12, unaluna, Victoria'smom, ~Christina
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 bluemountains, faerie_moon_x, kindachaotic, thebelljar12, unaluna, Yoda
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#2
Apr 04, 2013, 06:26 PM
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Sounds like a wonderful therapist you've got there, manicminer! I had a therapist who led me down a similar path & it really helped. It's amazing how we can subconsciously carry crap around from our childhoods. I hope you're able to learn more about yourself in this process. I know I did.
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| manicminer
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| manicminer, thebelljar12
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#3
Apr 04, 2013, 06:26 PM
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My story too except I still think I suck. :/
Quote:
__________________
Qui Cantat Bis Orat - He who sings prays twice Ingrezza 80 mg Propranolol 40 mg Benztropine 1 mg Vraylar 6 mg  Gabapentin 600 mg Klonopin 1 mg 2x daily |
| manicminer
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| manicminer
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#4
Apr 04, 2013, 06:28 PM
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Quote:
As do I. If you ask me, I'm a worthless piece of ****. But we gotta get out of the habit of thinking that way. You, for example, are a mother of 3, published writer, awesome photographer, and a genuinely nice person. You don't suck at all. 
__________________
BIG changes on the horizon Hopin' it all goes well... Oxcarbazepine: 300mg 2x/day Fish Oil, Vitamin D3, Magnesium, Lipitor, BEta-Blocker |
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#5
Apr 04, 2013, 06:43 PM
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Quote:
Sounds like you had a great breakthrough. You are so lucky to have found this counselor!!  When I want to stop being hard on myself, I try to help someone in need. It brings a smile to my face when I can do something like donate some of my books to the library, help someone carry something, no matter how big or small, it can be humbling. 
__________________
 Diagnosed w/ Bipolar II, adult ADD, GAD Current regimen: 25 mg Topamax 10 mg Celexa 10 mg Inderal (3x daily) 80 mg Strattera |
| manicminer
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| manicminer
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#6
Apr 04, 2013, 07:11 PM
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Good stuff miner, I almost cried too reading that. There's a saying "change your thinking, change your life". I'm working on changing those default critical voices.
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| manicminer
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| manicminer
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#7
Apr 04, 2013, 11:29 PM
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I do this, too and it's something I struggle with. (I've been working on correcting this thought process for a few years.)
Global statements are generally an indicator of depression and by using specific examples you can show yourself that those global statements don't apply to you. Refreshing post to read!
__________________
"You got to fight those gnomes...tell them to get out of your head!" |
| manicminer
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| manicminer
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#8
Apr 05, 2013, 02:09 AM
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I knew this man was inside you all along.
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| manicminer
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| manicminer
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#9
Apr 05, 2013, 08:30 AM
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 Warm fuzzy feelings inside from reading your post! Thanks for sharing and congratz on your breakthrough, I have no doubt that you will put this info to good use
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| manicminer
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| manicminer
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#10
Apr 05, 2013, 10:13 AM
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Bruises heal. Words hang on. That whole "sticks and stones" poem is actually quiet oposite. "Sticks and stone may break my bones but words will scar me for life." Fighting back against those words is hard.
Just know you're not alone. I have tons of scars that I carry around in my head, too. It's hard to learn to stand up for yourself. Plus it's hard to learn to stand up and not become the oposite and become beligerant. It's a long road. A worthy road, but a long one.
__________________
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| manicminer
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| manicminer
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#11
Apr 05, 2013, 09:29 PM
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I am so very very happy for you
__________________
Helping others gets me out of my own head ~ |
| manicminer
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| manicminer
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#12
Apr 05, 2013, 10:51 PM
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I just want to send you hugs
for all that you share that helps us to feel better about ourselves!Bluemountains |
| manicminer
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| manicminer
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