Do I have some form of Bipolar, or no? Need your collective help.

To begin with, I know this post is long and I apologize for that. Also, I recognize that probably none of you are psychiatrists for psychologists but many of you are extremely educated in the area of Bipolar Disorders. I would like to get your input/opinion. I met with my Pdoc a few weeks ago about all of the below. When I asked him what's going on (what direction is he leaning as far as a diagnosis) all he can tell me is my situation is "complex". He prescribed Risperdal and asked me to come back in a month to talk again. What do you think? Thank you in advance for your help.

--- Formally diagnosed by Pdoc with Generalized Anxiety Disorder in 2002-- taking antidepressants. Since 2002 I have been on about 7 different AD's -- they poop-out after a few years (or less) but they do work for me -- the excessive, baseless worry is gone.

--- About five years ago I was prescribed Lamictal to stabilize hyperactive thoughts and feelings by a general practitioner (GP) doc.

--- A year ago I was unofficially diagnosed with ADHD by a (GP) doc. -- taking ADHD meds which cause extreme anxiety and incredibly high (too high) libido daily.

State of things prior to taking antidepressants (2002 and before):

- Very severe baseless, excessive worry.

- Very irritable. High on temper and low on patience with wife and children.

- A week or so periods of mild feelings of melancholy/sadness about 3-4 times per year. Uninterested in doing things. No energy, just Blah.

- Prior to taking AD's I had multiple bouts of moderate to low-severe depression as a result of severe fear and worry due to multiple crises at work -- real and unreal (almost fired and fear of being fired).

- Difficulty in getting to sleep because of racing thoughts and worry. Wake-up in middle of night with racing thoughts and worry.

- Chronic moderate to high feelings of tiredness/mental fatigue, but not drowsy-tired -- especially toward end of week.

- Chronic, very-high libido.

- Mild to moderate irrational fear and paranoia of people at work talking negatively about me behind my back. Caused by constant fear and worry of losing my job.

Behavioral characteristics after starting antidepressants but before starting on Lamictal:

- Tremendous relief from all the worrying as a result of GAD. Weight taken off shoulders.

- Much happier. Feeling free of suffering.

- Feelings of invisibility.

- AD's seem to be very activating for me -- I am more "hyper" than before.

- Mild, periodic feelings of want to engage in disagreements.

- Moderate to excessive talkativeness than before.

- Moderate racing thoughts, but not worry or fear based. Just "fast" thinking at times. Maybe that's normal?

- Overly charismatic with others than before -- at times saying “off the wall” silly-stupid kinds of things.

--- Lamictal seems to have evened-out/leveled the "high" points brought on by taking AD's.

Other "unique" behavioral characteristics I have regardless of taking Antidepressants or Lamictal:

- Failure to listen during conversations, interrupt others, jump around in thoughts/topics when speaking.

- Easily distracted.

- Easily bored.

- Off and on low-grade depression -- just underneath the surface. Hardly noticeable but recognize it's there at times. At times when this occurs I don't want to do anything active. Just want to stay home and watch TV -- just "Veg-out". No recognizable feelings of being depressed/sad.

- Extreme lack of motivation at work.

- Mild to moderate restlessness while sitting. Bounce my legs a lot while sitting at a desk, move myself around in desk chair, fiddle with desk objects in my hand.

- Can be very hyper-focused (such as writing this post) without being distracted.

- Moderate, inconsistent impulsive spending.

- Moderate memory loss.

- Moderate poor concentration.

- Can be very indecisive at times.

- Mild to moderate thoughts/feelings of invincibility.

--- What do you think is going on? Some of these things I'm sure are completely normal, but which are not? Thank you!

I think its time to take this list of symptoms to a psychiatrist and see what the doc thinks. With all the symptoms and factors you bring to the table, it would be a far stretch for anyone but a lisenced professional to give you a solid answer.

best wishes and good luck

Honestly you'll get many post w/ opinions. however, none will be from a licensed therapist or psychiatrist. It's best to see a professional to receive a clinical diagnoses.

Hang in there

Please try to get in with a psychotherapist and keep a mood chart. Thety can observe you far longer then a pdoc and give you ideas to cope while meds are adjusting and dx are forming. Please give your t and pdoc permission to talk and share notes.

Since you seem to be new to this - pdoc is psychiatrist; tdoc is therapist/psychologist

Edit: oops misread some of your post and I was rambling about something that doesn't apply.

I'm sorry you've had to struggle so long.

EJ