[bluemountains]

I had visit #2 with the therapist yesterday. I like her, although I am still judging if she is too nice for me. She makes me think of someone who would have worn flowers in her hair and carried a peace sign in the seventies. She has a very gentle, caring manner.

A question that I have received both weeks is if I consider myself to have bipolar. Oddly enough, I really used to mentally fight this diagnosis all of the time, but I don't anymore. She says that people are misdiagnosed all of the time. I agree, having been dxed with clinical depression for years. I described to her my behaviors that have led to this diagnosis, and talked about my moods.

Then I guess I got a bit more vocal about my thoughts because I wanted her to understand that I can live with the day-to-day stuff, but I get so tired of the cycle:
Low, low, low feelings with desperate thoughts--->Several visits with the pdoc trying to get a working med combination, causing bouts of hypomania, depression--->Drugs finally are right, months or even over a year of kind of normal --->Start sliding so slowly that I don't realize it, bad hypomania, the kind that makes me a cussing, short-tempered maniac--->if no adjustments are made, it's back to desperation

Through all of this, my pdoc a fam. doc always ask me if I am still in therapy. What is it about me that presents the need for constant therapy? I know in the end I have a choice, but I try to play by the rules because I have children who depend on me.

Has anyone on this board ever graduated from therapy?

Bluemountains

[~Christina]

I have been in Therapy weekly for 3 years.. Im 46 but diagnosed BP little over 3 years ago. My Bipolar began when I was about 6 years old. So I have loads of bad decisions and unhealthy thought processes to wade through I have self hatred and loathing of myself to the extreme and that isn't going to change anytime soon.

Will I need Therapy forever? I don't know. I respect my Therapist and love him ( not in a creepy way ) He is the reason I am still alive.

[kaliope]

I honestly think I could graduate from therapy. I don't know why I am going. im afraid not to go. its been a constant the last three years of my life but I don't really do anything in therapy any more, it just feels safe to keep going. im afraid I will lose my spot or something if I quit going, but I don't really need it. we talk about superficial things. we don't work anymore. it is just for comfort. if it weren't free, I wouldn't be going.

[Victoria'smom]

I will be in therapy forever. because each mania and each depression brings out different issues. I want to stay on as little medication as possible but I need someone to look over weather I need hospitalization or not. a professional to ride out storm with me and help myself and my husband understand what is going on.

[Cocosurviving]

My onset w/ BP1 was at age 35. I was first misdiagnosed w/ depression when in fact I was going through a BP depression episode. After being put on a AD and flipping to mania, my diagnoses was corrected (age 36). I've been attending therapy since my diagnoses (July 2012). Although I just got started. I plan on participating in therapy as long as a have episodes. I have went from weekly appts to every two weeks. If I'm dealing with something stressful or something big is going to take place. I start going back to therapy weekly. I would even opt to seeing my therapist one a month "if" I have been stable a long period of time w/ no episodes. While medicated, I've only had 1-1/2 month break from having a episode. I'm going through one now, it started Oct 2012. I'm dealing w/ my pdoc trying to find the right med combo.
I hope this info helps answer ur question.

Take care

[bluemountains]

Originally Posted by Cocosurviving

My onset w/ BP1 was at age 35. I was first misdiagnosed w/ depression when in fact I was going through a BP depression episode. After being put on a AD and flipping to mania, my diagnoses was corrected (age 36). I've been attending therapy since my diagnoses (July 2012). Although I just got started. I plan on participating in therapy as long as a have episodes. I have went from weekly appts to every two weeks. If I'm dealing with something stressful or something big is going to take place. I start going back to therapy weekly. I would even opt to seeing my therapist one a month "if" I have been stable a long period of time w/ no episodes. While medicated, I've only had 1-1/2 month break from having a episode. I'm going through one now, it started Oct 2012. I'm dealing w/ my pdoc trying to find the right med combo.
I hope this info helps answer ur question.

Take care

Hi Cocoa,
I am sorry you are on such a long stretch of getting your meds straight. During my last episode it took me 8 months to work out the meds and I thought that nothing was ever going to work! I still think I might need some fine tuning, but I am having other physical problems right now, hormonal, so the pdoc doesn't want to do anything yet.

I didn't really expect to find anyone here who has graduated from t-maybe breaks when feeling healthy, but for me bp never really lets go.
Bluemountains

[Cocosurviving]

Originally Posted by bluemountains

Hi Cocoa,
I am sorry you are on such a long stretch of getting your meds straight. During my last episode it took me 8 months to work out the meds and I thought that nothing was ever going to work! I still think I might need some fine tuning, but I am having other physical problems right now, hormonal, so the pdoc doesn't want to do anything yet.

I didn't really expect to find anyone here who has graduated from t-maybe breaks when feeling healthy, but for me bp never really lets go.
Bluemountains

Thanks for understanding. I completely agree, BP never let's go.