[JoyDivision7680]

I'm having a lot of bipolar symptoms, but what got me thinking is the fact that I can't seem to be able to focus on just one word when reading because my eyes sort of move, like they're gently trembling/rotating, in addition to not being able to focus on slow moving people. Another issue is that my arms are shaking almost daily. For a few seconds I have a "semi-seizure" during which one -or, rarely, both- of my hands' biceps hardens and the rest of the arm shakes. Sometimes the whole arm does that.

I know bipolar and schizophrenic prodrome look an awful lot. I'm sort of afraid to ask my therapist because he then might tell me I'm either a dumb kid who thinks a psychiatric diagnosis is cool, or someone who wants to get those disability money to buy drugs or something like that. I know it's silly, but knowing this doesn't convince me to ask.

Two Saturdays ago I encountered an old man who told me he used to be a painter, he painted even churches, but he had the same destiny as Picasso so now he's a hobo. He then asked me if I had some money to give him to buy something to eat. I told him I had nothing, because many hobos here don't buy food with the money they get, but cigarettes and alcohol. He looked disapointed but he didn't make a scene there. I apologised and left. Then I turned around to make sure he wasn't following me but he was gone, even though when we split up he looked like he was going in the same direction as me. In addition to that, during our small conversation I could see a man with his kids looking at me talking to that hobo, but when turned my head and look at the man, he'd turn his head in the oposite direction. That made me wonder if the hobo was real. Also, the man's hair had the same length my hair had before I cut it at the end of February. He was wearing glasses, just like me, and was almost as tall as I am. I'd also love to paint and draw. That's weird.

[Axiom]

Hi! I have quite a few symptoms of schizophrenia and a whole lot of symptoms of bipolar (I certainly qualify for a bipolar diagnosis). My psychologists and psychiatrist say I might be developing schizophrenia, and I'm currently in hospital for evaluation. Are you sure these were hallucinations? Have you ever had delusions? You should maybe consider asking your doctor about this, but if you don't want to you can try just being honest about your symptoms and possible hallucinations, etc, and see what your doctor says. If you are at risk for developing schizophrenia, you might need antipsychotics. I'm not sure if hallucinations alone are enough to say that you could be developing schizophrenia.

[JoyDivision7680]

I'm not sure it was a hallucination, but I'm not sure it was real either. I'm very confused! It seems like a hallucination, yet it could be real...
I have had some delusions, not "big" ones though, during hypomania. I know hallucinations aren't the determinant factors, but I also have those problems focusing on slow moving objects and hand shaking. I'd rather be developing schizophrenia than epilepsy or Parkinson, to be honest!
I'll probably tell my psychiatrist, she seems nicer than the therapist.
Also, do you have Internet in psych wards?

[Axiom]

Yeah, I have internet in the psych ward here. But I'm not in the US, so I don't know how they do it there. Schizophrenia definitely sounds better than Parkinson's. If you're worried I would definitely bring this up with your doctor. And keep an eye out for other hallucinations (and other symptoms to tell your doctor about). I tend to forget about them if I don't make an effort to remember them.

[JoyDivision7680]

I'm not in the US either.
I'm gonna write every unusual, different, exacerbated etc. thing I notice. If the hallucinations and delusions kick in it could pass a long time before I seek any assistance.

[Confusedinomicon]

You may be experiencing Tardive dyskinesia from medications. This is serious and your doctor should be informed of these sensations.

[JoyDivision7680]

Not on meds