I have been so confused with my situation. I have been in treatment since Oct. 2013. Currently on 1000 mg Depacote daily. I still have some mood swings/irritability. I will go weeks zoombied out in my own world blocking out everything. Then I see how little money I still have left (been unemployed for 3 years since being fired) and then anxiety kicks in with depression.

I have been hoping to get disability, but do I deserve it. I see people who seem like they have it worse off and they cannot get it.

I've been treated for depression in the past as well as ocd. I cannot stand to be around people unless it's in a non serious kind of way. I have gotten to a point where I am scared as hell to be around people. I'm afraid if they make fun of me, cuss me, holler at me, pick at me, or call me names that I might come unglued.

If I am denied benefits, I have no clue as to how I will generate any income for myself from here on out. I have degenerative arthur and been told by a S.S. doctor that I need back surgery. Another doctor told me to tell employers that I could not lift anything but I'm not disabled. My blood pressure has been consistently at 180/110. I'm 44 years old. My last job was retail auto parts sales. I was into retail sales for 14 years with 2 firings for verbal outbursts to save on my back, but now hate dealing with people. It is so nerve wracking.

With all my problems, there is no way that I even want to consider trying to find me a girlfriend and burden them. So, I am destined to a life of nothing.

My 76 year old father who is almost completely blind is how I'm surviving. What happens if he checks out tonight?

I feel like a total utter loser, however I was a very bright kid in school. I grew up pretty poor though.

Why is it that if you grow up living in a trailer, riding in old cars, and still live in a trailer and drive 15 year old cars, society looks at you like a waste?

Some people are not born rich, have to work low paying jobs, and then when health issues arise, suddenly they are called lazy, don't want to work, and are worthless. I have a friend who has more or less said that to me. That's why I hate people. People can be so judgemental.

So in closing, anyone have any suggestions as my patience wears short waiting for a disability hearing within next couple of months and I hope I don't look like a fool or lose my tongue while before a judge.

Do I deserve to get ssdi? I myself don't think so because society says an unmarried and childless man deserves nothing.

[Dix888]

You deserve ssdi/ssi. Bipolar/OCD etc. are conditions of the brain which is an organ. It's an illness, not laziness. There is nothing wrong with living in a trailer. My family lived in a trailer for years. I have good friends who lived in trailers--brilliant, actor friends. Many people with these brain disorders are amazingly smart & creative but it's hard to "deal" with people who don't have these problems. There's a lot of stigma & judgment. Don't give up on trying to get soc. sec. disability!

[Curiosity77]

You sound deserving of disability to me, but I'm in Canada, so I really don't know what the criteria are to qualify in the US. I hope it goes well for you.

[BioAdoptMom3]

You have a physical illness which manifests itself mostly in behavioral symptoms. You DO deserve assistance! You are NOT lazy by any means and I agree, there is nothing wrong with living in a trailer/mobile home!

Nancy

[i8u3z]

Originally Posted by Lmciyah

I have been so confused with my situation. I have been in treatment since Oct. 2013. Currently on 1000 mg Depacote daily. I still have some mood swings/irritability. I will go weeks zoombied out in my own world blocking out everything. Then I see how little money I still have left (been unemployed for 3 years since being fired) and then anxiety kicks in with depression.

I have been hoping to get disability, but do I deserve it. I see people who seem like they have it worse off and they cannot get it.

I've been treated for depression in the past as well as ocd. I cannot stand to be around people unless it's in a non serious kind of way. I have gotten to a point where I am scared as hell to be around people. I'm afraid if they make fun of me, cuss me, holler at me, pick at me, or call me names that I might come unglued.

If I am denied benefits, I have no clue as to how I will generate any income for myself from here on out. I have degenerative arthur and been told by a S.S. doctor that I need back surgery. Another doctor told me to tell employers that I could not lift anything but I'm not disabled. My blood pressure has been consistently at 180/110. I'm 44 years old. My last job was retail auto parts sales. I was into retail sales for 14 years with 2 firings for verbal outbursts to save on my back, but now hate dealing with people. It is so nerve wracking.

With all my problems, there is no way that I even want to consider trying to find me a girlfriend and burden them. So, I am destined to a life of nothing.

My 76 year old father who is almost completely blind is how I'm surviving. What happens if he checks out tonight?

I feel like a total utter loser, however I was a very bright kid in school. I grew up pretty poor though.

Why is it that if you grow up living in a trailer, riding in old cars, and still live in a trailer and drive 15 year old cars, society looks at you like a waste?

Some people are not born rich, have to work low paying jobs, and then when health issues arise, suddenly they are called lazy, don't want to work, and are worthless. I have a friend who has more or less said that to me. That's why I hate people. People can be so judgemental.

So in closing, anyone have any suggestions as my patience wears short waiting for a disability hearing within next couple of months and I hope I don't look like a fool or lose my tongue while before a judge.

Do I deserve to get ssdi? I myself don't think so because society says an unmarried and childless man deserves nothing.

You deserve SSDI. You aren't a loser. I understand hating people and fearing them. I don't have any suggestions because I feel like I am in the same situation as you. I just wanted you to know, you aren't alone.

Yes I am a loser. No job = no life. Why do I have to continue to be alive? And if I do get ssdi, what do I say if I find a female friend to ask out when she asks where do I work?

[BipolaRNurse]

Be honest and tell her you're disabled if the topic comes up. If she's worthy of you, she won't mind the truth.

[Victoria'smom]

If I do get ssdi, what do I say if I find a female friend to ask out when she asks where do I work? tell her what you do. How you fill your day.

[Talanic]

It took me a little over a year to get benefits. They denied me at first, but appealed as fast as possible. Don't give up. Stand your ground. Being Bipolar is a very good reason to get benefits and you're defiantly NOT lazy. If I can get it, and others who are bipolar can get it (I've been told about tons of other people who are bipolar getting it) then I see no reason that you can't.

I'm sorry things are so hard. Just keep trying and again don't give up! I hope things get better.

Originally Posted by BipolaRNurse

Be honest and tell her you're disabled if the topic comes up. If she's worthy of you, she won't mind the truth.

Now that sounds like something my deceased mother would have told me.