New to bipolar

I was just diagnosed with bipolar 2 last week. Up until then I was diagnosed with and being treated for generalized anxiety disorder. I'm on 20 mg of Lexapro along with Klonopin as needed for panic attacks. After about 6 months of symptoms progressively getting worse I was referred to a psychiatrist that diagnosed me with bipolar disorder. I guess I never thought to research anything other than anxiety but after discussing it, I fit the symptoms almost exactly. I was started on Lamictal.

I'm seeing a therapist but unable to get in until Aug 27th. In the mean time my head is just swirling with questions. The biggest one being, how do I tell if I'm hypomanic or just having a good day? I was in depression for about 2 weeks, felt semi-normal for about a day (or at least not as unmotivated and uncaring as the day before) and then the next day I was go-go-go - very productive and getting everything done but at the same time I had the racing thoughts and changing tasks randomly. I knew it was probably a manic state but at the same time I was enjoying it...to an extent. For once I wasn't zoned out on the couch with no motivation and not able to find a single thing that would be enjoyable to do. So I didn't know if I should just keep riding the high or take a klonopin to help me slow down a bit and concentrate. That stage lasted about 3 days, and for about 2-3 days I've felt more stable. My mind isn't racing anymore but I am starting to slowly lose my motivation. My worst fear is waking up in a depression again. That is miserable.

How do I even begin to manage all of this, especially when my doctor said it can take a long time for the Lamictal to begin to work, so "be patient."

It does take time for the meds to work. Frustrating but true. There are some great books recommended at the beginning of the forum, that will help you understand and relate.

Ugh - tell me about the hurry up and wait to get in to a therapist or doc! My son has BP as well as myself. He can't be seen until September 16th and desperately needs scripts filled he had been taking for 9 months. Never simple.

I too was put on Lexapro which put me into severe mania, leading to my Diagnosis. Took months to come down from those awful manic side effects but at least we're on the right track now. I got the Lamictal rash, so now on Trileptal. Works ok.

But know you are not alone, and lots of great people and advice on here. In time you will recognize triggers. Sleep for me is a big one. Not enough I know I'm headed for mania. Depression can be hard too. Seems to go in troughs and waves.

Journaling can help recognize triggers, and I think is good to get it out too. You can look back and even see how far you've progressed.

Hopefully the Lamictal will stabilize you soon and the symptoms not so intense.

My very best wishes for you. hit me up anytime if you need to vent or talk. I have three children with me, and I want to be my stable for them.

Today has been a downward slope. I work part time but have been asked to change my schedule around and add more hours to help train new people. I have willingly offered to help out but the requests just keep coming. Today it's like I hit a breaking point and I don't feel like giving in anymore. That seemed to trigger all these overwhelming thoughts - I have too much stuff to do and no motivation to do any of it. I had a crying fit which brought out all the sad realization that I have nothing to offer my family except burden. I'm useless when I feel like this. I can't accomplish anything around the house much less be the mom I want to be to my 2 young children. I hate myself and this ever-raging battle inside my mind that I can't control. I felt so good last week (if not too good) and then I stabled out for a bit, and now I feel like I'm crashing today. I wish I knew how to break the cycle and not hate myself so much, even though my husband is so supportive and tries to tell me I'm not useless. If it weren't for my kids and husband, I'd be afraid for my safety. Already I have thoughts of taking more than prescribed klonopin just to numb my mind and go to sleep so I can stop beating myself up constantly. But I know that is dangerous and I don't want to be selfish so I don't do it. Nobody in my life has BP nor do they understand it. I feel so alone. I feel like people just think I'm being a drama queen and doing this for attention. I don't know what to do while waiting for my medication to start working and not being able to get into therapy for another 3 weeks. I don't know how to handle this.

Give medicines time to work, and take them as instructed. No alcohol, drugs, or risk loosing what the right medications are intending for. Don't stop taken medications and never hide that fact from your doctor.

I'm age 64 and only diagnosed a couple of years ago I was BPII. I have a psychiatrist I really like. She seems to know how to treat me with medications. I see her every 3 months, without failure. I never knew the other me, the not the real me, until I saw the right psychiatrist. I did have another psychiatrist before her, but he just did not get it right, and my wife knew it all along where I was fooling myself. Spent years, three or four, with the wrong psychiatrist. BPII was messing my life up, purchased things I should not have, and I never knew it.

lexapro put me in the psych hospital but lead to a dx of bp.....my meds took a very long time to work and then changed to lamictal which has been a godsend for me.....i wish you the best..

Mama hang in there, things go up and down, the worst will pass. You are not a horrible person for getting down and lacking motivation. If you broke your leg and were on the couch you would forgive yourself. How have you coped with your ups and downs until now? Remind yourself that this will pass. Hang in there and keep posting here. Let your dh know how you are feeling and ask for the hugs you need.

I was put on Lexapro for GAD by my primary doctor. My psych said he did not want to stop it yet until my Lamictal starts working and is at a good dosage, at which point we will begin to wean off the Lexapro (I believe). When starting the Lexapro and also after doubling the dose, I felt a lot better for about a month, but during the 2nd month I would have the racing thoughts, unable to concentrate, and unable to focus on one thing at a time. Then I started noticing the thoughts overwhelming me which would turn into a depression because I hate myself that I have this problem. This is what lead to a referral to a psychiatrist and the diagnoses of Bipolar II.

I've always strived to be the best mom and wife I can be. My husband works hard to allow me to only work part time, the deal being that I would be able to manage the workload of kids and the house more effectively. That worked for a while, still stressful, but I thought that was just normal. Only recently has it become more of a problem to where I break down. Looking back I've always struggled with at least anxiety but I just pushed onward and tried to put on a fake persona of being able to do it all. I think it's all caught up with me now and I can't cope. I try to read a book or watch a show, but the thoughs never go away completely.

If your husband is supportive get him involved. Mine goes to every pdoc appt and has a good relationship with him. My husband is my advocate when things go bad. Have him read books dealing with bipolar. Give books to others you tell such as best friends, or relatives etc. Get out there and speak up for what you need! You owe it to your kids to get the help you need so you can take good care of them. This is a family disease.

I've asked my husband if he would be willing to go to a therapy or psych appt and he said he would but I wonder if they would let him. He mentioned that he doesn't want to give off the impression that I might hold back because of him being there. I'm comfortable talking to him but at the same time I feel guilty for pulling him into my hell and asking him to take on my burdens.

The thought of reading a book about BP right now just makes me want to cry. I wish I could just forget about it and not deal with it, which I know is now impossible, but I can't face it right now.

I've been on lamictal and lexapro for ten years...they are really helpful. I'm also dx with bp2. I also take geodon which Is an anti psychotic and neurontin for anxiety. The lamictal and geodon are the ones I can't live without. It sounds like you've been having a rough time...I'm sorry for that. Read as much as you can on bp so you can learn the signs and symptoms. Welcome to the group! There are so many helpful people on here. I wish you luck with yr New meds. Take care

Ships in the night man.... ships in the night...... I wish you the best... u do need to get rid of any bad habits... not being able to have a drink from time to time does stink I'll admit.... u gotta stay strict on your meds or things can become a real mess in a hurry

About the drinking, my doctor did mention to stop all together because I could be more at risk at becoming dependent on it along with my klonopin. Does that truly mean I can NEVER have a glass of wine here and there? I don't drink at the same time I take my meds - it's hours apart.

mom2boys hang in there, I'm on Lamictal and have been for almost 10 years. I was in rough shape as I titrated up but once I got there it changed my life. You can do it. You are not alone.

Its very common when first diagnosed to kinda freak out and every mood or bump is so scarey not knowing where it will lead or what to do if this happens or that ... You were Bipolar most likely long before you were diagnosed . It can be scarey not knowing what to do or how to do it and "does this change me" You have hundreds of questions rolling around in your head ( thats normal)

Medications do in fact take a long time to find just the right ones and right doses if you choose to go the medication route. Must have patience for that.

Charting your moods can be very helpful to show your Pdoc and just for yourself to see any patterns ..You can do it by paper or there are apps for your phone.

Best advice is learn all you can about Bipolar and start building coping skills they are just as important as the medications and Therapy.

Also as a side note ... If you havent had a complete physical lately have one done and check your thyroid too .. If your thyroid is off it can really effect your moods

Welcome to Pc