[Dandelion18]

New here... Things came to a head today and I really was suffering. The only relief I felt was knowing I could end it all if I wanted to. I laid in a some what catatonic state for about 2 hours feeling out of body, numb, giddy at the thought of death. Like a cool wave it washed over me, knowing I don't always have to be in this much pain. I've been to IP three times but that was for AN . This is different , my food isn't suffering but I am unable to work or do basic duties. I am more manic and low then I ever have been. I don't want to do something during a low that I could regret or seriously harm/kill myself. I am on some meds but I don't think they are helping. There is very little treatment options around me, and being a year out of IP I don't want to go back again. Any auggestions? I'm going to try and see my pdoc next week if possible. I need to get through the weekend of work,
Some how. I am moving soon and can't loose my job .

[kaliope]

well not being able to care for yourself would suggest IP, but if you are going to harm yourself and your certain of this, then as long as you are going to see pdoc next week then I personally would stay home but I would take time off work until meds took effect. when I was messed up pdoc let me stay home but I saw me every day until the new meds took effect because he knew I didn't want to go IP. I work with too many people to not be able to function and try to work at the same time. take care of yourself.

[newtothis31]

Keep in mind that moving can be a very common trigger. What are the time off policies at your job? How long have you been there?

[Victoria'smom]

AN can flare when in episode so be careful. Do you have a therapist to increase your frequently of appointments?