[ozzy1313]

I was trying to describe this to my therapist yesterday. It is so hard for me to work on things when I am not feeling them at that moment.

A few weeks ago I was curled on the bathroom floor hysterically crying, but right now I am completely unable to even remotely be able to feel whatever I was feeling. Same thing when I am feeling a little hypo. With the bathroom episode when I explained it to her I explained it like I was on the outside watching myself. I could describe the situation bc I could see it, but I couldn't feel it- it was like I was telling her about a movie I had watched.

Anyone else talk about their life like it is a movie they are watching? This is really only during extreme times. Day to day stuff like going to work, cleaning, etc I can think back and am in my body.

[Angelique67]

Yes, especially when I was in withdrawal. I often forget how things felt though. But I had a strong sense of being outside looking in at the hospital.

[LastQuestion]

I think what you've been experiencing is depersonalization/derealization disorder. When I was trying to understand what I was going through I learned it has something to do with certain regions of the brain not being able to efficiently commumicate with each other. It sometimes happens to 'normal' people, but it usually isn't a recurrant or persistent phenomenon for them.

I noticed the more psychological stress I was under the more intense my sense of unreality would become. There's no psychiatric treatment for it (it is another poorly researched mental health disorder, although it seems to be more a neurological dysfunction as opposed to psychiatric disorder). Ironically, it is also a side effect one can have in response to treatment with and withdrawal from psychotropics often prescribed in the practice of psychiatry.

It could be due to medication, extreme stress, trauma (neurological or psychological), or...sigh. My pdoc didn't recognize it, multiple therapists didn't recognize it, but people on the internet did. They also had advise in ways to cope with it, which is more than I can say for the trained professionals I've encountered. It's still a good idea to talk it over with them, even ask them to investigate it so they can provide some input (give them honework for a change!).

The best advice I found was to do my best to ignore it, which is basically trying to avoid the psychological stress it can provide. I have found that, in general, mitigating stress is the most helpful thing I can do at this point. I can deal with sorting through what it is to feel or not feel when I'm less destabilized by stressors.

[ChaoticSymphony]

Wow you put into words what I experience so often. I always feel like a fool when I was sitting in the T's office trying to explain. Completely void of any emotion and incapable of putting myself back to that time and explaining emotions involved. This incapability has led to me not even returning to my T since spring.

[Curious651]

Yup. Been there and definitely know what your saying.

[Crazy Hitch]

Originally Posted by ozzy1313

I was trying to describe this to my therapist yesterday. It is so hard for me to work on things when I am not feeling them at that moment.

A few weeks ago I was curled on the bathroom floor hysterically crying, but right now I am completely unable to even remotely be able to feel whatever I was feeling. Same thing when I am feeling a little hypo. With the bathroom episode when I explained it to her I explained it like I was on the outside watching myself. I could describe the situation bc I could see it, but I couldn't feel it- it was like I was telling her about a movie I had watched.

Anyone else talk about their life like it is a movie they are watching? This is really only during extreme times. Day to day stuff like going to work, cleaning, etc I can think back and am in my body.

Totally understand what you're saying. I get this during severe depressive episodes and for me it's exactly as you described - watching my life from the outside as if it's a movie.