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Old Nov 22, 2014, 10:27 PM
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So, I'm single, and I've really wanted a serious relationship. Is that possible with having bipolar? Or am I deluding myself? Where would I go to find guys who aren't afraid of such a thing?
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  #2  
Old Nov 22, 2014, 10:41 PM
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I have no idea where you would go to find them but I know that there are guys around that would not be scared off because of your illness. My son is married to someone who is Bipolar and it takes work and learning and understanding but he loves her and that's enough.
  #3  
Old Nov 22, 2014, 11:14 PM
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You can definitely have a serious relationship despite being bipolar. I am bipolar type 1 and I have been with my boyfriend for over a year. He is very caring and understanding about my bipolar. I have taught him a lot about bipolar disorder, as well, so he can better understand me. We make it work
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  #4  
Old Nov 23, 2014, 01:20 AM
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I have bp and bpd .... And I'm married.

Not sure how it works but it just does.

Certainly doesn't mean to say we don't have our fair share of ups and downs. Because I do.

But all relationships take hard work. It's not easy. But it's not impossible.
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Old Nov 23, 2014, 07:36 AM
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I agree with the above posts. Having a relationship as a bipolar person is indeed very possible. Having a good relationship is very possible too if you find the right person, and you deserve that. A month after I started seeing my current boyfriend I fell into a deep depression, was hospitalised for a month and required ECT. He stood by me, to my amazement, and our relationship has only deepened from the experience. I really hope you can find the right person for you. There is hope.
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  #6  
Old Nov 23, 2014, 08:57 AM
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Of course its possible, it's actually probable, I mean just think about it rationally and not emotionally for a moment...

How likely is it that every bipolar person on earth is single, and will remain single for the rest of their days?.....

Not very hey

I'm in a relationship too, I have a BP, BPD, OCD dx, and have been with my BF for 5 years. Known him since HS though, he's the one who suggested I seek help, my acronyms haven't chased him off.

In time I'm sure you will find the person that is right for you, one who will see past the acronyms, sometimes it takes time to weed through the a$$holes though.
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Old Nov 23, 2014, 09:09 AM
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[QUOTE=Artchic528;4118219]So, I'm single, and I've really wanted a serious relationship. Is that possible with having bipolar? Or am I deluding myself? Where would I go to find guys who aren't afraid of such a thing?[/QUO
First see yourself as a "being' existing now. quit judging, as your perfect other is as confusing to you as you are to yourself.
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Old Nov 23, 2014, 10:29 AM
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Throughout my undiagnosed states of 24 years, I went through 3 marriages. Each with more domestic violent than the last. I was ready to give up as the attraction to angry men had become my typical mates.
When I crashed to finding myself in a shelter for battered women, I finally woke up the increasing patterns and that I must be doing something terribly wrong. Or later to learn, there must be something terribly wrong with me. That's when I started seeking help for treatment but, was wrongly diagnosed with depression. Every visit thereafter, I would There is a very stable ending to this but, that's for another time.
  #9  
Old Nov 23, 2014, 10:43 AM
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I feel you can. Everyone, bipolar or not, (I believe) is hoping their love will come along. I am trying my best to be patient myself. I feel as long ad you don't use the disorder for a justification to treat people badly then the right relationship will come along one day. (:
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  #10  
Old Nov 23, 2014, 10:51 AM
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I just tell the potential dates up-front I am bp1... and see if they run away. You will find someone
  #11  
Old Nov 23, 2014, 04:18 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by SqrqhJean View Post
I feel you can. Everyone, bipolar or not, (I believe) is hoping their love will come along. I am trying my best to be patient myself. I feel as long ad you don't use the disorder for a justification to treat people badly then the right relationship will come along one day. (:
Well, I lost my optimism somewhere along the way. I'm tired of people flaking on me for some reason or another (usually due to my bipolar).
  #12  
Old Nov 23, 2014, 04:40 PM
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Originally Posted by Artchic528 View Post
Well, I lost my optimism somewhere along the way. I'm tired of people flaking on me for some reason or another (usually due to my bipolar).


If you don't mind my asking, what exactly is it about your bipolar that has them running for the hills every single time?


Are they just ignorant and affected by the stigma of BP? or do you display undesirable behaviors during mood episodes that they are unwilling to (for a lack of a better term) "put up with".


Ps. For the record, I don't want anyone to feel they have to "put up" with me, you're either in my life because you want to be and you accept me, or you ***** off... Simple
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Old Nov 23, 2014, 04:52 PM
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I don't think having a relationship when your Bipolar is that much harder than having one with out a "label(s) attached" .

And keep in mind telling X person on date one that you have Bipolar is stupid and useless, You might hit date # 4 and decide he is an asshat , Don't box yourself into a corner until you just might just in fact meet a person that is worthy of your disclosure.

I am married I have Bipolar , My husband is very supportive, because I dont use Biploar as an excuse to act stupid, if I am in a bad place up or down , he offers support he doesn't try to fix. I am the only one that can pull my shyt together.

Relationship take a lot of work, regardless it a MI is involved or not.
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  #14  
Old Nov 23, 2014, 05:39 PM
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Married 22 years, I'm 64 now. I am BP, wife is not. Before I got medications from my psychiatrist 3 years ago, wife found our marriage was very difficulty, and it took being diagnosed, medications, and professional help before I even understood what she, and I, was dealing with. I have some sour moments now and then, but not a total jerk to be with. Had I not gotten help, the help my wife set for me to see the psychiatrist together, very possible we would have divorced. The wife probably would not last much longer, because our daughter was turning into an adult, and being on her own not long from now.
  #15  
Old Nov 23, 2014, 08:38 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Trippin2.0 View Post
If you don't mind my asking, what exactly is it about your bipolar that has them running for the hills every single time?


Are they just ignorant and affected by the stigma of BP? or do you display undesirable behaviors during mood episodes that they are unwilling to (for a lack of a better term) "put up with".


Ps. For the record, I don't want anyone to feel they have to "put up" with me, you're either in my life because you want to be and you accept me, or you ***** off... Simple
It's the undesirable behaviors I display. For example, when I got really depressed after a guy broke my heart, but wanted to just be friends, I was suicidal, and he just up and blocked me on facebook.
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Old Nov 24, 2014, 12:38 AM
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Originally Posted by Artchic528 View Post
It's the undesirable behaviors I display. For example, when I got really depressed after a guy broke my heart, but wanted to just be friends, I was suicidal, and he just up and blocked me on facebook.
Sometimes people just don't know how to deal with intense feelings, or how to deal with someone when they are suicidal. They lack the skills or experience. You need to find good supports for when you are having your dark times. Someone (friend, therapist) who can be there when you need them.

I've been married for 14 years. Dh knew me since I was 13 and we married when I was 24. He always said he liked me fiery (he himself was very calm). Dh has a history of depression and anxiety, he has the "O" from OCD. He is well functioning though, and provides me with a lot of understanding and support. Having felt suicidal himself in the distant past, he is understanding when the darkness has taken me there.

I think there are reasons to love a bipolar person. I have always felt that certain aspects of my personality were compelling and productive.
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Old Nov 24, 2014, 10:05 AM
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Yes I agree, some topics are best kept between ourselves and a confidant, be it a T or trusted friend.


My bf has never shied away from my demons, but I choose to keep certain things from him, suicidal periods being one of them as he once had a gf who committed suicide... I wouldn't want him fearing that I'm destined to the same fate as her.


It's very important to not give our loved ones the responsibility of being our life lines, or our reasons for breathing. That's just too much weight for any one person to shoulder.


If we have the option, we should try and spread out the functions of our support system, that way we don't run the risk of burning out anybody, or expecting a type of support they are unable to provide.


I'm really sorry he bailed on you at such a crucial time, and the sad thing is, I can't say its the most rarest thing to ever occur
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Old Nov 24, 2014, 07:36 PM
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Yeah. Now I know this guy was using me for his own personal gain, and when things got too serious, he freaked.

So yeah....where is my Mr. Right? Does a Mr. Right even exist? For that matter, I don't think romantic love exists because I've never really experienced it.
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Old Nov 24, 2014, 10:32 PM
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It's hard to know where to meet people. Singles I know have tried the websites and also getting hooked up through friends. Do either of those seem like an option for you? Or doing something through your school alumni, a community meet up walk...
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  #20  
Old Nov 25, 2014, 03:22 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Wander View Post
I agree with the above posts. Having a relationship as a bipolar person is indeed very possible. Having a good relationship is very possible too if you find the right person, and you deserve that. A month after I started seeing my current boyfriend I fell into a deep depression, was hospitalised for a month and required ECT. He stood by me, to my amazement, and our relationship has only deepened from the experience. I really hope you can find the right person for you. There is hope.
Bipolar and relationships
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Old Nov 25, 2014, 04:03 AM
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Well, maybe things will change. I don't have much hope though, as I've been let down quite a bit in the past.
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Old Nov 25, 2014, 05:36 PM
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I've been married 10 years and I have 3 kids. It is not impossible just because you have bipolar. But the best thing is to be at a good place for yourself. You never know in life what will come along.
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  #23  
Old Nov 25, 2014, 05:55 PM
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Originally Posted by Artchic528 View Post
So, I'm single, and I've really wanted a serious relationship. Is that possible with having bipolar? Or am I deluding myself? Where would I go to find guys who aren't afraid of such a thing?

Possible but not easy. Depends on your mate but don't rush it. Need time for them to see the ins and outs and get to know you as well as your struggles. Course you should do the same as well.. I wouldn't make a relationship a high priority though. Take care of yourself
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Old Nov 27, 2014, 07:57 PM
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I agree basically with everyone else but I'm in your shoes single and wanting a serious relationship (for once). Well I find it almost overwhelming when it comes to dating guys and where to find them. The magic of fb works ALOT. But I always worry they'll run scared when an episode hits. And do I tell them right away? I just don't know. It's a real process to date and be bipolar or km probably like always making things more complicated than things should be. I don't know. So if you figure away out share with me.
  #25  
Old Nov 27, 2014, 09:53 PM
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I am sure there is someone out there that will love you for you, and will accept your bipolar diagnosis. It is possible to be in a relationship with bipolar. I found a relationship with a man who also has mental health issues. We been together for almost 6 years. We have challenges but the love is there. I know it's hard to meet new people and offer full disclosure. I'm not sure where to find the right person but I hope that you find a loving and compassionate person to love.
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