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  #26  
Old Dec 25, 2014, 07:56 PM
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true i do have plans tomorrow and am taking my daughter to her friend's tomorrow too. im looking forward to bedtime tonight.
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Qui Cantat Bis Orat - He who sings prays twice
Ingrezza 80 mg
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  #27  
Old Dec 25, 2014, 07:57 PM
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still a few more presents to give out.
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Qui Cantat Bis Orat - He who sings prays twice
Ingrezza 80 mg
Propranolol 40 mg
Benztropine 1 mg
Vraylar 4.5 mg

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  #28  
Old Dec 25, 2014, 08:51 PM
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i need my bed but everyone is still here
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Qui Cantat Bis Orat - He who sings prays twice
Ingrezza 80 mg
Propranolol 40 mg
Benztropine 1 mg
Vraylar 4.5 mg

Gabapentin 600 mg
Klonopin 1 mg 2x daily
  #29  
Old Dec 26, 2014, 10:44 PM
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xxxxxxxxxxxx
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Qui Cantat Bis Orat - He who sings prays twice
Ingrezza 80 mg
Propranolol 40 mg
Benztropine 1 mg
Vraylar 4.5 mg

Gabapentin 600 mg
Klonopin 1 mg 2x daily
  #30  
Old Dec 27, 2014, 04:28 PM
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at a family gathering. nobody listening to me.
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Qui Cantat Bis Orat - He who sings prays twice
Ingrezza 80 mg
Propranolol 40 mg
Benztropine 1 mg
Vraylar 4.5 mg

Gabapentin 600 mg
Klonopin 1 mg 2x daily
  #31  
Old Dec 27, 2014, 04:57 PM
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thats not true. the dog gave me kisses on the lips lol
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Qui Cantat Bis Orat - He who sings prays twice
Ingrezza 80 mg
Propranolol 40 mg
Benztropine 1 mg
Vraylar 4.5 mg

Gabapentin 600 mg
Klonopin 1 mg 2x daily
  #32  
Old Dec 27, 2014, 07:49 PM
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im in the dark sitting with my friend. kids with their dad. negative thoughts. whats new
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Qui Cantat Bis Orat - He who sings prays twice
Ingrezza 80 mg
Propranolol 40 mg
Benztropine 1 mg
Vraylar 4.5 mg

Gabapentin 600 mg
Klonopin 1 mg 2x daily
  #33  
Old Dec 27, 2014, 07:59 PM
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maybe i should just go to sleep.
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Qui Cantat Bis Orat - He who sings prays twice
Ingrezza 80 mg
Propranolol 40 mg
Benztropine 1 mg
Vraylar 4.5 mg

Gabapentin 600 mg
Klonopin 1 mg 2x daily
  #34  
Old Dec 27, 2014, 08:09 PM
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Can you take a walk/get some fresh air? Have you eaten?
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  #35  
Old Dec 27, 2014, 10:21 PM
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my friend cheered me up a bit.
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Qui Cantat Bis Orat - He who sings prays twice
Ingrezza 80 mg
Propranolol 40 mg
Benztropine 1 mg
Vraylar 4.5 mg

Gabapentin 600 mg
Klonopin 1 mg 2x daily
  #36  
Old Dec 27, 2014, 10:22 PM
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i should eat yes
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Qui Cantat Bis Orat - He who sings prays twice
Ingrezza 80 mg
Propranolol 40 mg
Benztropine 1 mg
Vraylar 4.5 mg

Gabapentin 600 mg
Klonopin 1 mg 2x daily
  #37  
Old Dec 27, 2014, 10:30 PM
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done eating. feel better but still bad thoughts
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Qui Cantat Bis Orat - He who sings prays twice
Ingrezza 80 mg
Propranolol 40 mg
Benztropine 1 mg
Vraylar 4.5 mg

Gabapentin 600 mg
Klonopin 1 mg 2x daily
  #38  
Old Dec 27, 2014, 11:02 PM
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Can you be an observer of your thoughts? Watch them go by as leaves down a river. You are not your thoughts. Deep within you have calm. Deep within the waters of the stormy ocean the water is calm. Hope some of these visualizations help.
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  #39  
Old Dec 28, 2014, 11:33 AM
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with a friend ive never met before
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Qui Cantat Bis Orat - He who sings prays twice
Ingrezza 80 mg
Propranolol 40 mg
Benztropine 1 mg
Vraylar 4.5 mg

Gabapentin 600 mg
Klonopin 1 mg 2x daily
  #40  
Old Dec 29, 2014, 02:34 PM
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with another friend and my youngest
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Qui Cantat Bis Orat - He who sings prays twice
Ingrezza 80 mg
Propranolol 40 mg
Benztropine 1 mg
Vraylar 4.5 mg

Gabapentin 600 mg
Klonopin 1 mg 2x daily
  #41  
Old Dec 29, 2014, 04:44 PM
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I'm glad you have such an active social life and are out and about all the time. Focus on reminding yourself that, when the intrustive thoughts begin...

" I feel terrible I hate my life " ~~~> No wait I had lunch with X friend and had a great time.

See?
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  #42  
Old Dec 30, 2014, 09:20 PM
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i saw my friend again today. we went to a miseum. i got up at six . tired now! no plans tomorrow.
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Qui Cantat Bis Orat - He who sings prays twice
Ingrezza 80 mg
Propranolol 40 mg
Benztropine 1 mg
Vraylar 4.5 mg

Gabapentin 600 mg
Klonopin 1 mg 2x daily
  #43  
Old Dec 31, 2014, 02:16 PM
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with ken today. sitting at starbucks. tired. clean though!
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Qui Cantat Bis Orat - He who sings prays twice
Ingrezza 80 mg
Propranolol 40 mg
Benztropine 1 mg
Vraylar 4.5 mg

Gabapentin 600 mg
Klonopin 1 mg 2x daily
Hugs from:
Imah
Thanks for this!
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  #44  
Old Dec 31, 2014, 02:27 PM
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Moose, I am just entering my depressed state. What I decipher from the low feeling I describe this way. Its not like sadness, its like my instinctive ability to fight has such a low chemical response that if my heart beat and breathing didn't happen automatically, I would just stop. My brain senses this, and interprets this as sadness so I think of sad things.

For me, trying to see depression this way helps me to not get caught up in sad thoughts and ride the storm out better.

I am glad that you are doing okay. Happy New Year.
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  #45  
Old Dec 31, 2014, 04:23 PM
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Planning to pay my phone bill. exciting no?
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Qui Cantat Bis Orat - He who sings prays twice
Ingrezza 80 mg
Propranolol 40 mg
Benztropine 1 mg
Vraylar 4.5 mg

Gabapentin 600 mg
Klonopin 1 mg 2x daily
Hugs from:
Imah
Thanks for this!
Imah
  #46  
Old Dec 31, 2014, 07:36 PM
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watching malificent with family. champagne and cheese and crackers. yum.
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Qui Cantat Bis Orat - He who sings prays twice
Ingrezza 80 mg
Propranolol 40 mg
Benztropine 1 mg
Vraylar 4.5 mg

Gabapentin 600 mg
Klonopin 1 mg 2x daily
  #47  
Old Jan 01, 2015, 08:27 PM
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Gotta call pdic for. refill im out of. hate when she wont write refills.
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Qui Cantat Bis Orat - He who sings prays twice
Ingrezza 80 mg
Propranolol 40 mg
Benztropine 1 mg
Vraylar 4.5 mg

Gabapentin 600 mg
Klonopin 1 mg 2x daily
  #48  
Old Jan 02, 2015, 02:28 PM
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getting refill. shopping with daughter.
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Qui Cantat Bis Orat - He who sings prays twice
Ingrezza 80 mg
Propranolol 40 mg
Benztropine 1 mg
Vraylar 4.5 mg

Gabapentin 600 mg
Klonopin 1 mg 2x daily
Hugs from:
Imah
Thanks for this!
Imah
  #49  
Old Jan 02, 2015, 03:03 PM
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i still feel my life is waiting to collapse
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Qui Cantat Bis Orat - He who sings prays twice
Ingrezza 80 mg
Propranolol 40 mg
Benztropine 1 mg
Vraylar 4.5 mg

Gabapentin 600 mg
Klonopin 1 mg 2x daily
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  #50  
Old Jan 02, 2015, 03:10 PM
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Imah Imah is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Moose72 View Post
i still feel my life is waiting to collapse
Moose, I find the word 'waiting' intriguing. I often feel the feeling of impending doom. Something dark waiting in the shadows to pounce and boom - my life as I know it will change and some upheaval will send it spinning out of control.

I wonder if that is what you mean? I have control issues. Not with others, but in my own life, I like knowing what to expect, and what may or may not happen and when things happen (like in November my oil furnace stopped working) I have to get on it immediately to make sure it is taken care of. I get very one minded and direct, not focusing on anything else til it gets resolved. (I can become belligerent toward any obstacle that stands in the way of what I perceive as my solution, not hearing others if they present a different idea)

If your 'waiting' is similar - I would wonder if you had recently had some big life change that you are still adjusting to, and if it were shocking to your system, and if you are just carrying fear of the unknown around like I sometimes do.

Thoughts?
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BEST OF LUCK TO US ALL!

600 mg Trileptal (oxcarbazepine) 30 mg Atarax (hydroxyzine) 8 mg Trilafon (perphenazine)

Bipolar 1 - Borderline Personality Disorder - Generalized Anxiety Disorder - Eating Disorder



Last edited by Imah; Jan 02, 2015 at 05:45 PM.
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