[Blitter2014]

So I'm a red head. We have a long standing reputation as people who have short tempers and anger. I have never considered myself an angry person. I have alwasy worked really really hard to never be angry, or to never show it. When I get angry I internalize, and take it out on myself. I stew about things, ruminate and then feel angry at the sub sequential thoughts. But have only ever acted physically a couple of times in my life. But I digress.

For months I have been telling my Psych team that I am cycling. That something else is going on that I am having real trouble controlling. That in between the massive depressive cycles are smaller cycles where I am silly happy though not manic, then within days super angry to the point of not caring if I die or not and actually wishing it would happen. When I last saw my team I told them I was concerned about going too high. Today I was as angry as I have ever been and yet can only think of one thing that was to blame, and it was something that I should have been able to dismiss quickly. I don't see my team for another three weeks.

My Question. How Do I get my Psych Team to take me seriously? Is this all in my head? And is my anger me or part of my Bipolar? Cause as I tried to explain to my wife, either it is part of my Bipolar or I have anger management issues and am the angry person everyone associates with redheads. I am hoping its Bipolar, cause the last thing I want to have to deal with is having another personality flaw thrown in my face,I think having Bipolar is enough of a curse.

[gayleggg]

It could be a hypomanic state. I know I get really irritable when I'm hypomanic, to the point of being angry all the time. It's like I can stay angry for days with very little provocation. There are other indicators such as sleeping less, and more energy. Much like a manic phase but not as severe. I used to internalize all my anger, too and now it seems to seep out.

I'm not sure how you could get your team to pay more attention to the problem, but I think it is important that they do. I do think it is probably the bipolar. Of course, I'm not a doctor.

[SeekerOfLife]

[coloradogal]

I don't know you, so can only share my experience. When I am hypomanic (as I am currently) my anger is nasty and vicious. I will lash out at my fiance for absolutely no reason at all, start fights, drop F bombs, bring up the past, say things I definitely shouldn't say, and get so angry and irritable that I boil inside and shake.
I wish I had that elated, happy mania, but oh no! It's definitely not that! I'm sorry you don't feel like your team is listening to you, but at least you have a place here to talk things out.

[Justugh]

it is simple to explain it to them

u walk in u sit down and go look if u do not do something to control this anger in me i am going to end up blowing and taken out every asshole i see until someone takes me out

i been telling u for weeks it has been grown if u do not do something soon to help me with it u will listed in the lawsuit since it has been documented that i have asked for help and nothing is coming from u guys so legally your on the hook

so help me with my trouble or get ready to lose everything in the court system once u been ided and listed in the suit (i kept records of the times i asked for help what was said and the names of all my doctors)

that got them to listen to me and get me on something to keep calm ..........or they will lock u in a mental ward but they will take the anger as something they need to confront and control

if they do not listen head to the nearest hospital and check yourself into mental ward and never go back to that set of doctors again have the hospital assign u a new set ....if u check yourself in u can check yourself out

[GALAXYGAL]

We are going to have break-through episodes even when our meds are working for us. It's frustrating to lose our balance. That said, we don't have to eat humble pie just because it appears we are dependent on meds and the health care system to keep us on keel.

If you're not already, try to keep a daily record of how you feel during the day - angry, happy, silly, and what you were doing at the time of your anger, what set you off. Then take this into your team and read it to them/express yourself standing up. That might get their attention. Sometimes we forget the details or down play our feelings while we sink into the chair.

Good Luck!

[Wander]

I am guessing the anger issue is to do with your BP. DO you notice it getting worse during any particular episode? My irritability and anger sky rockets during manic and mixed episodes but when I am stable I am a very calm and cheerful person. To help with the anger and irritability I take zyprexa and Clonazepam when it gets really bad. These meds help a lot, especially on days like today when I am in a mixed episode and need to make it through a full day at work without snapping at my customers.