[Curiosity77]

I'm a nurse and i work in community mental health, and also have bipolar disorder. I've been doing this work 10 years. I have hidden my mental health issues professionally, mainly because of stigma, but also shame and denial. It's a long story, and the details don't really matter. Anyways, in the past year i've been a little more open about it, but only if it is somehow relevant. And i don't tell patients, except vague things like that i've been to some dark places too.

Anyways, i've been under sone scrutiny because of a hospitalization 3 years ago, but that period of monitoring is ending in just a few months. I want to do something anti-stigma, to talk about what i've experienced, and to demonstrate that even so i am a really good nurse.

It would be a political, mad-pride kind of thing to do. And i could never take it back. But at some point i want to, maybe soon.

I became a nurse because i was treated badly every time i ended up in the ER at 19 and 20, and i knew i could do a better job, show people more compassion. And i get to do that all the time, and i love it.

Something to take a stance that there is no difference between the patients and professionals, we are all people, and no one is immune to mental illness. I want to make what i've been through meaningful.

So how to do it is the question, and when.

[~Christina]

Maybe talk to people who lead "local support groups" not just Bipolar , I mean any support group would probably love to know that a person like you " caring for MI people "while you take care of yourself would be an amazing gift to offer. People just need hope, Your life and struggle and ability to push and push and not let anything stop you.. well hell , if that doesn't inspire hope and help others really think about "stigma"

I would advise you to start small , make sure your mental health is staying in good working order and help whomever you can.

I do think you need to be mindful that you may infact run into a current patient and decide ahead of time how you might deal with what could be awkward .. and either your patient will love you even more or have them second guessing your ability to effectively care for them while you deal with the same illness.

I think your an amazing person with a huge heart

[Imah]

In the figurative march forward some people will be the leaders and others followers.

If you want to make a change, make a difference, raise awareness, then know that doing so at the work place isn't the only venue. You don't have to hide or lie, but you could participate in community events, groups etc. so that the wall you are pressing against isn't the one that butters your bread.

Perhaps you could explore with your pdoc why your motivation is to make your stand at your place of work. Unresolved feelings against the scrutiny? Because of what happened in your late teens early twenties? Ask the question - who are you trying to prove your worth to?

I personally am not ever wanting to knock down walls of ignorance, but prefer to stay in the shadows and watch others make things happen except when I take on small changes where I see a need.

I have known strong souls like yourself who are game changers and admire that. I wish you the best of luck in whatever you decide to do.

[avlady]

I like what Imah said take on small changes where you're needed. having been in the mental health system for over 30 years as a patient, it has changed so much for the good because of people like you. I remember being totally abused by the other patients and especially workers which left me speechless. The pshyc wards were filled with punishment and pain, at the hand of the staff too. i have stories that you wouldn't believe. At my last stay about 2 years ago, i couldn't believe there were actually compassionate people since i never experienced compassion from other hospitals before. I think the government made some changes and expectations for workers in the hospitals. Well, all i can say is i hope it keeps getting better, i, myself am less afraid to go and get myself too.

[Curiosity77]

Originally Posted by avlady

I like what Imah said take on small changes where you're needed. having been in the mental health system for over 30 years as a patient, it has changed so much for the good because of people like you. I remember being totally abused by the other patients and especially workers which left me speechless. The pshyc wards were filled with punishment and pain, at the hand of the staff too. i have stories that you wouldn't believe. At my last stay about 2 years ago, i couldn't believe there were actually compassionate people since i never experienced compassion from other hospitals before. I think the government made some changes and expectations for workers in the hospitals. Well, all i can say is i hope it keeps getting better, i, myself am less afraid to go and get myself too.

I'm afraid too, but i want to do it. I don't know if i can actually go through with it though. I think a lot of the reason is because i've been mistreated by the nursing college (where nurses are registered), and by my employers - but it's been behind closed doors, thankfully. And that's for 40 months once it is finally over. Thankfully the people that i actually work with directly don't know because i deal with employee health and with a contracted outside agency. So i'm wanting to take a stand against that. I feel like if people knew they wouldn't support this kind of thing, so maybe the system could change. But i could be totally wrong and the general population may think all of this is reasonable. Hard to say. But some people would definitely agree with me. I'm not doing anything until at least a few months from now when this is over, and i should probably talk it over with my pdoc to get her opinion about it. It just really bothers me that things still are the way things are, and the system pretends to be about recovery when that's not what happens. I'm just frustrated because it's so wrong, and i don't want other people to go through the same thing.

[Love&Toil]

I admire you.