[irritable4life]

Tried all the meds..all they do is make me tired and give me lasting side effects..I am tired of dealing with my head..it is like I will be stuck n my bed and can't shut my brain off..like I don't want to do anything or go or see anyone..I just b stuck n my room..sick with thoughts..worry..and thoughts of how I can just mix some pills and die in my sleep peacefully..I am loosing hope..there is no end to this emotional ride!!

[Crazy Hitch]

Hi irritable4life,

Thank you for sharing this with us.

There are a lot of emotions and anxiety going on here, this is my personal reflection after having read what you have written.

I feel these things sometimes too.

The worry ......

Feeling like meds aren't working .....

Unable to shut this thinking off ......

Sick with thoughts .....

Grappling with the idea you can end it all by "I can can just mix some pills and die in my sleep peacefully" .....

Losing hope .....

These are quite intrusive thoughts you have going on here.

Yes, I have had these thoughts when I have been in an episode.

My personal reflection on this is, it would be a good idea for you to speak to your medical practitioner about these thoughts, if you have not done so already, as they seem congruent with your current mood episode.

Hang in there and let us know how you go.

[wiretwister]

Originally Posted by irritable4life

Tried all the meds..all they do is make me tired and give me lasting side effects..I am tired of dealing with my head..it is like I will be stuck n my bed and can't shut my brain off..like I don't want to do anything or go or see anyone..I just b stuck n my room..sick with thoughts..worry..and thoughts of how I can just mix some pills and die in my sleep peacefully..I am loosing hope..there is no end to this emotional ride!!

I could have written this myself,, please don't give up,, there is always hope, human life (your life) is the most important thing there is,, this I know is true....God Bless...please keep us informed and keep posting .

Randy.........

[vjdragonfly]

It is hard to keep on hanging to hopes that seem useless, but it is not. Bp is a sickness that deludes sensible thinking. A good start is to be aware of your illness and try to keep it in your mind when you are going through an episode. I try and talk myself through things now. Hope things get better for you. Never give up.