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  #1  
Old Mar 10, 2015, 03:34 PM
ParanoidPizza ParanoidPizza is offline
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If I feel my friend is lying to me but assures me I'm just assuming, even though a few facts have popped up indicating they are lying; Should I just trust them and get over it, or is it time to walk away from this person.

We have always been close until recent.

He always tells me he loves me and when we are together he seems like that is the truth. But certain online interactions there have been some lies, or at least seems that way.
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  #2  
Old Mar 10, 2015, 04:22 PM
Anonymous200155
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I think that its dependent on the lies in question. Are they large lies? Or omissions? How badly do these lies affect you? Are you 100% sure they are lies?

Basically you have 3 options. The first one would be to let it go. If its mundane then it may be best to leave it alone. Is it worth killing the friendship over something small?

The other option is to walk away, depending on how severe the lies are. If these are things that can deeply affect you, then you are better off without that kind of distrust.

The third option, and maybe (imho) the best one, confront him. Lay all the cards on the table. Explain to him that you cherish him as a friend and you just want to get everything in the open. His reaction to you being honest as a friend is going to determine the best course of action to take next. Hope this helps.
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  #3  
Old Mar 10, 2015, 04:24 PM
Anonymous48690
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Hi paranoid pizza, what's your gut telling you hun?
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  #4  
Old Mar 10, 2015, 04:48 PM
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~Christina ~Christina is offline
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I would flat out ask. Have a discussion, once you have facts or as many as possible then you can make an decision.
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  #5  
Old Mar 10, 2015, 05:55 PM
ParanoidPizza ParanoidPizza is offline
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my gut tells me, if I need to ask then thy are lies. That the person doesn't want to hurt me but is avoiding me because they are upset and done with whatever it is. When I confront them with proof of the lie then they become anger. I notice they become anger at me for me jus saying, I miss them and it makes me sad I can't see them more.

I get the feeling they want me in their life, but just in case they need me.
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  #6  
Old Mar 10, 2015, 06:33 PM
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Crazy Hitch Crazy Hitch is offline
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Yes I second Christina - Ask. Investigate. Seek Clarity. Know Truth.
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  #7  
Old Mar 10, 2015, 07:43 PM
Anonymous48690
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ParanoidPizza View Post
my gut tells me, if I need to ask then thy are lies. That the person doesn't want to hurt me but is avoiding me because they are upset and done with whatever it is. When I confront them with proof of the lie then they become anger. I notice they become anger at me for me jus saying, I miss them and it makes me sad I can't see them more.

I get the feeling they want me in their life, but just in case they need me.
I'm sorry, to get angry over being busted in a lie sounds so lacking of respect. Just by their behavior I wouldn't put up with it. It's good enough to the admission of guilt. Someone trying to shove their crazy on me claiming its me is so wrong.
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  #8  
Old Mar 10, 2015, 08:53 PM
Daisy girl Daisy girl is offline
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You need to decide what you think is best for you. What makes you happy.

Daisy girl
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  #9  
Old Mar 10, 2015, 09:06 PM
ParanoidPizza ParanoidPizza is offline
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Thanks for all the responses. I found out today that I was mistaken on one of the lies. It seems after one deception, I starting seeing more deceptions when there were not. We talked and we seem to have worked things out. Only time will tell.
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  #10  
Old Mar 10, 2015, 09:08 PM
Daisy girl Daisy girl is offline
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Good luck. Hope all goes well!

Daisy girl
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  #11  
Old Mar 11, 2015, 01:18 AM
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RisuNeko RisuNeko is offline
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I hope you can work it out. But be careful not to let it become an unhealthy codependent relationship. I had a codependent relationship with my boyfriend after I broke up with him and we were just friends and last week it finally sunk in for me how unhealthy our relationship is and how we're not building each other up, we're just at each other's throats and taking joy in the other person doing poorly in a sadistic sort of way. So I ended it. Again. Haven't heard from him since. Now I have no friends except my two best friends that are realllllly hard to get in contact with, so that kind of sucks. I'll figure something out. It's just going to take time.
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  #12  
Old Mar 11, 2015, 03:59 AM
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Crazy Hitch Crazy Hitch is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ParanoidPizza View Post
Thanks for all the responses. I found out today that I was mistaken on one of the lies. It seems after one deception, I starting seeing more deceptions when there were not. We talked and we seem to have worked things out. Only time will tell.
This has happened to me too.

Well, I am glad that you got to the bottom of this.

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