[Becoming]

Want to throw up and have your stomach turned upside down when you see someone who brings up terrible memories? (some awful ex-friends of mine are visiting my college campus to see mutual friends).

These instances can throw a whole day off by making me angry and sad. I even start plotting fights with the people in my head. The anger builds and I could see myself lighting into them if there were an opportunity. That may be something I want to work on.

I cannot complain too much, I'm MUCH better than I once was without a doubt. I'm just not perfect and there are things I need to work on. This might be one of them. Any tips/thoughts?

For now...I'm just hoping I don't see their faces again. If they get in my way or end up sitting at the table I am at, it will not go well. I am 1000% sure that I will flip out at first opportunity or not even let them sit down if a mutual friend tried to bring them over.

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There's nothing wrong with walking away hun. Or if they sit at the table, just pick yourself up and walk off without saying a word. That says everything right there. You don't have to sit there and put up with it. You see them walking in a group just turn away go else where. They are not welcomed in your world, so easiest thing to do is to turn away. To do anything more than that like yell or fight puts them right back in your world actively like and trigger the bipolar worse. Your friends will understand why you got up and walked off eventually. Nobody will hold that against you. Good luck Hun and please hold your lunch!

[Becoming]

It went okay. I only saw them once. I think they're gone now. I sure hope so. I just don't think it will be the last I see of them.

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Your probably so right honey. Glad to hear it. I've been wondering, hoping that you didn't get triggered in a frenzied mess. Good girl