[ParanoidPizza]

I've been thinking about that quote a lot. And I just stare into the mirror reminded of how I'm not pretty but I wish I was dying so people would care.

When I was younger, I never thought I was pretty, but looking back I think I could have been. IDK

But now I see how tired I look, my crooked nose which is too big or maybe not big enough. Remember how my ex said I was just average, nothing special. And how I'm reminded of that since everyone I've loved has left.

I'm suppose to love myself, but I don't. I want too. But I just go back and forth. Never happy as long as the one staring back from the mirror is not pretty and never will be.

I don't know what I want. Do I want people to read this and tells me what I want to hear or tell me the truth but in the end, I don't know if I will ever see myself as more than just an unpretty face which no one will care about unless I'm dying. I have yet have anyone scared of losing me. I have yet to feel truly loved that I'm worth fight for.... I always seem to be the last resort, someone who is just for the time being.

I'm just tired...

[lunaticfringe]

I hear you...

And your ex sounds like a complete jerk in my opinion.

All I can say is that I have dealt with the same feelings are fears. Am I beautiful? Even if I am, will anyone care about me when I'm not?

The fact is that the only thing that matters is that we love ourselves. As difficult as it is, it's true. Not only is it healthy for us, but the number one thing others find attractive in another is self-confidence and self-assurance. If we love ourselves other people can see that right away.

It's a daily battle and it's so much harder having a mental illness.

Just hang in there. It WILL get better. The seasons change.

[ParanoidPizza]

Originally Posted by lunaticfringe

I hear you...

And your ex sounds like a complete jerk in my opinion.

All I can say is that I have dealt with the same feelings are fears. Am I beautiful? Even if I am, will anyone care about me when I'm not?

The fact is that the only thing that matters is that we love ourselves. As difficult as it is, it's true. Not only is it healthy for us, but the number one thing others find attractive in another is self-confidence and self-assurance. If we love ourselves other people can see that right away.

It's a daily battle and it's so much harder having a mental illness.

Just hang in there. It WILL get better. The seasons change.

Thanks, My worse fear at the moment is every year that passes seems to get worse. Like I feel worse, my outlook is harder to deal with and I see less and less future. It almost feels like it's becoming harder to fight the bipolar.

[~Christina]

I have huge issues with my looks , I do not see " me " as others see me .. I have anorexia and when I look in the mirror I see a very obese person , I don't like my face nor hair , but I do know "MY ' opinion of myself is not reality. I finally realize that for once in my life I do need to go by what close people in my life tell me. Will I ever get over my visual thoughts of myself? No probably not at this point , but I don't focus on what I think any more about my "looks"

But I do love my feet and finger nails. I keep them polished and very pretty .. But it is something that I do believe is attractive about me.

Find something , anything.

[Fuzzybear]

[BastetsMuse]

Beauty fades. Character lasts forever. Bipolars are full of character... we are interesting people to know, and those who take the time to really know us (and hang in there) are blessed.

[raspberrytorte]

Try doing some positive affirmations, like write down I AM BEAUTIFUL twenty times on a piece of paper, followed by I LOVE MYSELF. Positive affirmations make me feel good.

[ParanoidPizza]

thanks everyone. Im on a downward slope today. I will try the positive affirmations.

I agree with the character thing. Sometimes though, I'd trade having personality just to be loved.

I also struggle with being unpretty. When i was young i was pretty. It hurts when men don't open the door for me anymore. I just tell myself there's more to life than being pretty and more to life than romance. I also liked the previous poster's comment that beauty fades -- character doesn't.

this quote stings for me. i can only speak for myself and say that i care about many people who aren't pretty (bluntly put) or dying.