[Becoming]

Hey all,

So, when I can tell I'm not 100% stable (which I'd say is somewhat often), I will often scold myself about using electronics. By this I mean texting or social media mainly. I'm fine with video games since there's no real harm to be done there.

Anyways...my interest has peaked in a girl for the first time since my ex (hooray for finally getting over my ex after 8 months). I barely know her, but I keep getting a persistent need to text her. This always happens when I am interested in someone and it's a feeling I'd like to break. It continues within the relationship and I guess that makes me clingy. And then if I don't get a response right away I start wondering why and if I did something wrong or if I am bugging the person. This doesn't happen with friends...if it does then it's even less than once in a blue moon. I seem to know my friends want me around and I cannot bug them, but the second it's a girl I like, I feel like she wants me to go away even without evidence.

So I start thinking I ought to leave my phone in another room. I do sometimes, but then my Mom gets annoyed when she cannot reach me by text or a phone call. I just don't have the discipline not to often text girls that I have taken interest in. And if I decide to "wait" for them to text me I just get disappointed usually. So the phone in another room...a break from the phone is the best idea for me.

Can anyone relate to this or have any tips about being able to control myself and not have a strong urge to consistently text certain people?

On another somewhat unrelated note, I do have trouble with Facebook and Tumblr sometimes. I'm glad to say that I was feeling VERY strong emotions last night and I wanted to pour my heart out on Facebook, but I stopped myself. That's a first for me and I'm proud I was able to calm myself and make a better decision (to text friends about what was bothering me). Tumblr, however, is a place I often poor out my feelings and personal life. I guess partially because it's more anonymous. My use of this media has increased over the past month or so as well. I'm aiming not to get re-addicted, but I see myself heading in that direction. I'm not looking for a relaspe. Any advice on how to avoid these things?

Thank you for taking the time to read this. =)

[~Christina]

Best advice I have.... Make yourself write out things by hand and set an alarm for an hour or so later. Once that alarm goes off.. re-read what you wrote and see if it's something you really want to send or post.

Usually once you have time to reconsider you won't feel the urge to do something you might later regret.

Hope this helps

[Woolly Bugger]

How is the lamictal working for you? Are you hypomanic at all? I find that when I am, I become compulsive about texting and emailing. I can't stop myself. Then I become obsessed with receiving an immediate reply. At work, I write ill-advised emails and send them, even when I know I should not and that I may be jeopardizing my position. I've received some strange and puzzled responses, but, fortunately, I've managed to hold onto my job. When I become mixed, I get very angry and indignant, and my emails reflect this. It's so dangerous. I have no solution to your problem, except to remain as stable as possible so that you can think clearly about what you are doing.