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  #1  
Old Jun 30, 2015, 09:34 PM
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raspberrytorte raspberrytorte is offline
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I'm in our bedroom. I was writing, thinking about how good I've been lately, regarding attacks of paranoia, and then I heard keys jingling, and thought, oh, how nice! My husband is home early.

But then I heard the keys again.

And then I realized THERE ARE NO KEYS IN OUR APARTMENT RIGHT NOW. And there was no way my husband could be home because we have a really creaky front door. So then I thought oh my god, there's someone in our apartment, but how can there be anyone in our apartment because I didn't hear the door.

So I went to investigate, and that just freaked me out more because the lights are off and I kept on seeing shadows moving around furniture and ****, and now I'm terrified to even move from this spot, and there was an open magazine by the closet with this *****es face on it sneering at me, so I tore it up.

What is up with this ********?!

I'm not in an episode! Why am I suddenly having auditory hallucinations when I've never really had them before?

Is this just some twisted bipolar thing?

Does anyone else experience this ****?!
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  #2  
Old Jun 30, 2015, 09:36 PM
Anonymous37930
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Yeah I do. That's spooky as hell though.
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  #3  
Old Jun 30, 2015, 09:38 PM
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Seriously, is our apartment haunted all of a sudden?!
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The darkest of nights is followed by the brightest of days. 😊 - anonymous

The night belongs to you. 🌙- sleep token

"What if I can't get up and stand tall,
What if the diamond days are all gone, and
Who will I be when the Empire falls?
Wake up alone and I'll be forgotten." 😢 - sleep token
Hugs from:
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  #4  
Old Jun 30, 2015, 09:39 PM
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~Christina ~Christina is offline
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I have hallucinations, auditory and visual even when I am not in an episode at times. I just do lots of self grounding. Really sucks at times... Can you do self checks and use Logic to show yourself its not real?
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  #5  
Old Jun 30, 2015, 09:46 PM
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Yeah. I know it's not real, but I just get overwhelmed with terror.

At least I'm not the only one who experiences stuff like this, not that I want anyone to experience it of course.
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The darkest of nights is followed by the brightest of days. 😊 - anonymous

The night belongs to you. 🌙- sleep token

"What if I can't get up and stand tall,
What if the diamond days are all gone, and
Who will I be when the Empire falls?
Wake up alone and I'll be forgotten." 😢 - sleep token
  #6  
Old Jun 30, 2015, 09:47 PM
CopperStar CopperStar is offline
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Schizoaffective can include psychosis in the absence of a bipolar mood episode.

There are also other things that can activate mild psychosis, even just a severe anxiety attack with sleep deprivation, or something along those lines.

I definitely get the symptom of perceiving that faces in pictures, magazines, etc are looking at me during a paranoia episode, and I do get paranoid psychosis bouts.

Usually all I can do is pace and talk, to try to wind it down. Keep moving, keep talking to myself, keep explaining things to myself. Basically try to 'take charge' for the frightened parts of my mind and try to be a like a parent or a leader, be brave and try to stay focused and logical.

Don't be embarrassed or feel too silly to confront things. Reality testing might possibly be very helpful. Search the apartment, look in the closets, check everything, confirm for yourself that there is no one there, trust your instincts, trust yourself when you determine that it is just sounds that are not real, and so on.

Don't be afraid to call someone if it gets really bad. Talking can help.

Sorry you're experiencing this, I know those episodes suck something serious.
Thanks for this!
raspberrytorte
  #7  
Old Jun 30, 2015, 09:50 PM
Anonymous37930
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It might just be a harmless ghost.
  #8  
Old Jun 30, 2015, 09:56 PM
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Keep posting here !
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  #9  
Old Jun 30, 2015, 10:06 PM
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Luckily my husband is coming home soon.

Usually when this stuff happens I kind of sit in a corner and hug my knees to my chest.

I turned on all the lights. I checked everywhere. Nothing lurking, but it just feels like there's something staring at me. I'm outside right now having a smoke. It feels better being outside. I don't think I'm going back inside until my husband gets home.

Harmless ghost. Lol. Are you making fun of me?
__________________
The darkest of nights is followed by the brightest of days. 😊 - anonymous

The night belongs to you. 🌙- sleep token

"What if I can't get up and stand tall,
What if the diamond days are all gone, and
Who will I be when the Empire falls?
Wake up alone and I'll be forgotten." 😢 - sleep token
Hugs from:
~Christina
  #10  
Old Jun 30, 2015, 10:10 PM
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I feel like I'm ****ing losing my mind.
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The darkest of nights is followed by the brightest of days. 😊 - anonymous

The night belongs to you. 🌙- sleep token

"What if I can't get up and stand tall,
What if the diamond days are all gone, and
Who will I be when the Empire falls?
Wake up alone and I'll be forgotten." 😢 - sleep token
Hugs from:
HALLIEBETH87, LettinG0, Secretum
  #11  
Old Jun 30, 2015, 10:11 PM
Anonymous37930
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I'm sorry! I totally wasn't. I'm just a believer in the ghost world.
  #12  
Old Jun 30, 2015, 10:12 PM
Anonymous37930
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It's okay!!! I didn't mean to make it worse
  #13  
Old Jun 30, 2015, 10:16 PM
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raspberrytorte raspberrytorte is offline
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Don't worry. You didn't.
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The darkest of nights is followed by the brightest of days. 😊 - anonymous

The night belongs to you. 🌙- sleep token

"What if I can't get up and stand tall,
What if the diamond days are all gone, and
Who will I be when the Empire falls?
Wake up alone and I'll be forgotten." 😢 - sleep token
  #14  
Old Jun 30, 2015, 10:19 PM
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I don't believe in ghosts. But I do believe in negative entities.
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The darkest of nights is followed by the brightest of days. 😊 - anonymous

The night belongs to you. 🌙- sleep token

"What if I can't get up and stand tall,
What if the diamond days are all gone, and
Who will I be when the Empire falls?
Wake up alone and I'll be forgotten." 😢 - sleep token
Thanks for this!
Capriciousness
  #15  
Old Jun 30, 2015, 10:35 PM
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Can you wrap up in a blanket or something ? yeah its summer ,But it helps me to wrap up in a real light hoodie when I am questioning what I am seeing or hearing.. Something very soothing about it.
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Thanks for this!
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  #16  
Old Jun 30, 2015, 10:57 PM
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It is possible to have hallucinations and not lose your mind completely. I know several people (including myself) who have chronic hallucinations but rarely progress to having really severe, noticeable, dangerous psychosis.

How has your sleep been? You may just be tired...

I think your goal for now should be getting your anxiety under control. People who have serious psychotic breaks usually build up to them gradually. You're not going to lose your mind all in one night. Worse comes to worse, you continue having hallucinations, you call your pdoc tomorrow, he ups your AP, and you'll be fine.

If you have a PRN for anxiety, I'd take it now.
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Thanks for this!
raspberrytorte
  #17  
Old Jun 30, 2015, 10:58 PM
Row Jimmy Row Jimmy is offline
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I occasionally hear my name when no one says anything. I also see things out of the corner of my eye dashing by. Sometimes, I swat at it and people ask me what I'm doing. I just tell them I'm working on my karate moves.
Thanks for this!
raspberrytorte
  #18  
Old Jul 01, 2015, 01:17 AM
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What a frightening experience. Is your hubby home yet? Feeling any better? I have auditory hallucinations on occasion, even outside of episodes but usually with anxiety/panic. They can really freak me out. As Christina said, do all you can to stay grounded in reality. You are safe.
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  #19  
Old Jul 01, 2015, 11:17 AM
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raspberrytorte raspberrytorte is offline
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Thanks everyone. I feel better today. When my husband got home we talked about it, and then I took my seroquel and went to bed early (and since it was unseasonably cold last night I was able to snuggle under the covers!).
__________________
The darkest of nights is followed by the brightest of days. 😊 - anonymous

The night belongs to you. 🌙- sleep token

"What if I can't get up and stand tall,
What if the diamond days are all gone, and
Who will I be when the Empire falls?
Wake up alone and I'll be forgotten." 😢 - sleep token
Thanks for this!
~Christina
  #20  
Old Jul 01, 2015, 11:31 AM
CopperStar CopperStar is offline
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Glad it has stopped. Do you find that it is worse at night and indoors? I noticed you said it feels better to be outside and I'm the same way when I have paranoid psychosis issues. For whatever reason nature just doesn't seem that scary even when I'm trippin balls. It just seems like a dream or magical or something. Indoors is usually terrifying though.
  #21  
Old Jul 01, 2015, 12:50 PM
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It does usually happen in doors, and at night when I'm alone, but sometimes it happens in the afternoon when I'm alone at work, so I have to go outside to not completely freak out. Sometimes I take three breaks instead of two, just because of it (I'm only allotted two, but luckily, since I'm alone, no one has noticed yet).

Thankfully, my husband will be home at night the rest of the week.
__________________
The darkest of nights is followed by the brightest of days. 😊 - anonymous

The night belongs to you. 🌙- sleep token

"What if I can't get up and stand tall,
What if the diamond days are all gone, and
Who will I be when the Empire falls?
Wake up alone and I'll be forgotten." 😢 - sleep token
  #22  
Old Jul 01, 2015, 12:57 PM
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~Christina ~Christina is offline
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I'm glad your feeling better I hate when that happens and I have trouble reminding myself that shyt ain't real !
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Thanks for this!
raspberrytorte
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