[Treyfrancis21]

How do you guys answer this question? I realize it needs to be a different response for close friends, family, and acquaintances. Some deserve to know more than others. What I'm wondering is how you all respond in this situation.

I had a fairly good friend ask me the other day and my initial response was brushing it off and saying I'm okay. He pressed me, so I laid out the shittiness of my current depressive state.

My brain is broken, but I guess what I'm wondering is how do you guys decide when to tell people the truth about how you're feeling, and when to just lay down smoke screens. Just a curiosity I suppose. Besides, why not post on here and try to distract myself from the depths of melancholy.

[Pastel Kitten]

I'm glad you asked this because it's been on my mind a lot lately. For a long time, I was accustomed to saying "I'm okay" to most people who asked how I was doing, if I was currently in a depressive state. Nowadays though, I'm usually more honest with how I feel if the person is close to me or is someone I know I can trust. Most other people get the "I'm okay" response, though. It's just not something I can explain to them. The worst is when they ask "how have you been lately?" I can't just say "well, the past week or so was great but now I feel terrible!" I cycle through my moods quickly (1-3 weeks for each). They'd then ask "why, what happened?" and I can't just say "oh, just my brain messing up again." I almost always just end up saying I've been "alright," as sort of a combination of hypomania and depression. Then I don't need to explain I've been both way up there and way down.

[CopperStar]

I rarely tell anyone the truth, I always regret it when I do. I think that's probably to do with my BPD issues, though. Like telling someone my truth provokes that deeper, intense need in me to be validated and cared for, and when it doesn't happen, I feel absolutely devastated. If I never tell anyone, then I never have to feel that way.

[BlackSheep79]

I just say ok. I hate being analyzed by others so I put on that fake smile. I did it today as a matter of fact and just left work for the day because I couldn't fake it anymore.

[sui generis]

I just say okay or alright. If it's a close friend I might explain depending on how I'm feeling but I'll still start the with okay or alright. I'd feel weird just being like "I feel like a piece of crap today, lemme tell you about it" haha

[Treyfrancis21]

I took off early from work too. Luckily I have a good boss who knows I have issues and works to help me when I need to cut out.

[wiretwister]

if it was someone who could positively effect my condition I would be honest with them .... people who are just courious or just ask out of courtesy get the "I'm ok line" ...

[Treyfrancis21]

I like that approach Wiretwister. Makes sense that I shouldn't keep from sharing my mental state with those who can give me support or help in some way. Also stands to reason that everyone else deserves a standard reply.

My wife says I build up a wall around me and my problems and that I don't like to share them with anyone. I think it comes from my not wanting to burden others, but also like Copperstar said, my BPD issues could be keeping me distant to avoid the let down of not getting support in return and dealing with the rejection.

[Unrigged64072835]

I guess that would depend on how much they already know about me. With the people who know I'm bipolar I can be a little more honest. But for the most part I say I'm fine.

[Standup2me]

Originally Posted by BlackSheep79

I just say ok. I hate being analyzed by others so I put on that fake smile. I did it today as a matter of fact and just left work for the day because I couldn't fake it anymore.

I totally relate to this. Fake it until you make it

[aupele]

I have been very good at faking it for a while. Nowadays, my answer is "I'm alive." Some people say, "Praise God.", some look at me funny. That's how I feel just about everyday. I have to be grateful to be alive (and not ip or in jail).

I just say "Still Crazy" with a smile and leave it at that.

[gina_re]

Like everyone else, it depends who asks. Some people I feel more comfotable discussing certain issues if I need to. Other wise a simple I'm OK is what you're gonna get. If you don't need to know, you won't know.

[tamarama]

I only have one person who really wants to know when they ask this question. With them I answer honestly (as briefly as possible). With everyone else I say 'okay' and leave it at that.

[BastetsMuse]

Originally Posted by Treyfrancis21

How do you guys answer this question?

Most people don't really want to know the details, so if it's a stranger or someone I don't know well, I say "I'm fine or "I'm okay." If it's a friend who might want details, I will answer honestly but briefly, as in "Shaky today," or "Could be better." This leaves the person asking the opportunity to ask for more details if he/she wants to. Basically, I fight not to volunteer details unless I am certain the person wants them -- and I am never certain of that. Never.

[scatterbrained04]

I'm terrible with this question. I answer it on autopilot:

"I'm good, how are you?"
"I'm ok, how are you?"
"I'm tired."
"I don't feel well."

Yeah pointless question with me LOL