[Row Jimmy]

After a nine month run with just taking Depakote, my p-doc added Lithium to my diet a week ago and I feel great. I relapsed and had a tough December, walking out on my family and forcing my parents to leave my new home (which they saw for the first time on that very day). It sucked. My dad was real worried about me and he's 79 so it wasn't fair to him.

But the Lithium seems to control my propensity to be angry, impulsive, and paranoid. Now I take 10 pills a day......load 'em up! Thankfully, I'm tolerating it all pretty well so far.

Along with the Lithium, I finally got an official diagnosis of BP II last Wednesday. I knew before that I had an issue but my p-doc wasn't sure on what level I landed. Now, I feel more liberated than before.

Acceptance = direction, peace of mind. I am an adult. I'm 50. And I'm bipolar. For sure, one thing that has helped me is the complete acceptance of the diagnosis. Everything we read is sort of scary....it's a lifelong illness, we can relapse, we can move to BP I, we need to make all sorts of changes, etc.

But as I've come around to accepting it more than before, I found I could be completely honest with my family about who I am. Now, I can go to them and say "the doctor says" instead of "the doctor thinks". They asked me all sorts of cool questions and I found that information is power. I could educate them about who I am and what to expect. In the end, I'm just comfortable with me being me. So far, so good. One day at a time.

[Ocean Swimmer]

Very uplifting post. I'm glad you can accept bipolar.

[jacky8807]

Glad to hear you are doing well and feeling positive in your journey!!! Pretty awesome your family asks questions and trys too!

[gayleggg]

I'm so glad that you doing well. You are so right about taking it one day at a time.

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[Granger41]

Sounds good! :-) For the time I make the same experience. I am newly diagnosed with Bipolar II and I am glad that I know the "enemy" cause then it does not seem so scary any longer. I understand much better why I have done or felt such confusing things in the past. It is not easy to diagnose Bipolar because every person is different! I am glad that I will start with medication next week and that I will get the right treatment and support.

[Row Jimmy]

Granger, good luck.....recognition and acceptance are good first steps. Now we move forward and try to stay ahead of something that isn't curable but we can manage it well.

[Unrigged64072835]

I'm glad to hear of your acceptance, and your family's support as well.

Row Jimmy, isnt it wonderful to realize there is a name for what it is that ails you? You don't have to feel like there is something wrong with you anymore. Now you have a condition that you can treat it for. I am so happy for you, that your family is supportive and understanding. Blessings and all the best

[Row Jimmy]

Omega, I think it is most helpful (at least for me) to have a clinician *officially* diagnose me with something so people can stop saying things like "there's nothing wrong with you". It gives me a sense of peace.

[ComfortablyNumb5]

I'm happy to hear you're doing well on your meds and have a supportive family on top of it! Some of us are not that lucky. It's good that you are aware of the possibilities of relapse and the life long battle. Since we're being honest with the downfalls please be aware that throughout your experience you may find that you need to change meds and cocktails in the future. Just never give up and try to stay positive! Keep all your appointments and be honest with your mental health team. There's many times when I didn't speak up out of fear or pure laziness and ended up in the deep end again. And please be sure to keep up with your blood tests with your lithium and drink plenty of water! While lithium is a great stabilizer and often a first approach, I got very sick on it and a fellow BP friend of mine had to get dialysis because of toxicity. But there's other meds out there! Good luck and stay positive!

[Row Jimmy]

RX, thanks.......yeah I've been reading a lot about that sort of stuff. I have a very good friend of mine who suffers from a PD and had all sorts of substance abuse problems. He told me to be very careful about letting my guard down.....kind of like people saying "see, there was nothing wrong with you after all, you were misdiagnosed". There are a few people in my family that still don't believe there's anything wrong with me and I just need to "toughen up". Thankfully, my mom finally came around after I throttled her a month ago and she left my home in tears. Ironically, I inherited my mental illness from her and she refuses to get treatment for her own issues.

I'm trying hard to keep up with the water. That's been a tough one but I've been OK so far on the lithium. No side effects as far I can tell other than being thirsty. I had my first blood test about two hours ago!