I knew I was in serious trouble. I saw my T every day plus my Pdoc once per week

I attempted to circumvent going into mental hospital.

I was so far gone I don't remember anything of the Pdoc or Therapy sessions.

Or maybe it's the current result of the excessive ECT. And super heavy doses of psych meds.

I can not recall any treatments with the exception of being back at home with a nurse coming to visit every other day.

I had this incredibly horrid fear of losing control of my bladder whenever I had to go in a car.

I used to carry an adult diaper in the car. I was on the same meds I'm on now but also had ECT twice per month.

I already told my husband I'm never going to have ECT again. My current Pdoc is recommending monthly treatments. That's one reason I'm in Costa Rica. I have enough meds for 90 more days.

I'm going to need a new Pdoc in May that will agree to suspend the ECT. And who knows about the meds?

I never want ECT again .
I never want ip again. Is this possible???