[leejt1986]

Recently I've become close with someone I've known for a little over 3 years. She has her own struggle with mental illness. We've tried to be each other's support but it hasn't been working out. When I have my manic episodes I freak out and start thinking she is going to abandon me because we are getting too close. This past weekend we fought because she says talking about my mental illness stresses her out and makes her panic. She said she can't be my "emotional journal" because she panics and doesn't know how to help me. She has been having a friend confront me because she stressed out too much The thing that bothers me is that she says I'm not being a supportive friend when she wont open up. How am I supposed to be supportive if she won't open up? We're at the point where we can't talk to each other without arguing.

Does anyone have any advice to what I should do?

[Ocean Swimmer]

Maybe, if you want to keep her as your friend, you could do more than focus on talking. Go out. Have a picnic. Make a pact to table the mi issues for awhile. Just an idea.

[pirilin]

Nothing wrong with being friends, On the contrary.
I have a very good friend with schizophrenia, And we get along really well.
But we don't count on each other for support.

[leejt1986]

I think that was my mistake, she was willing to talk to me, but I shouldn't have relied on her

I like the idea of being able to talk/vent to each other - but remember she isn't your therapist, she is a friend. I have a friend that also has bipolar and an ED and we talk privately about it and share but we aren't a crutch for each other. I think that things will work out for you and your friend. She may feel overwhelmed right now but things will calm down. xo

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[Trippin2.0]

Doesn't look like its healthy for this friendship to include MH support.


Why not keep the friendship going but agree to take MI off the table...


I don't mean pretend nothing is wrong, and everything is peachy all the time. But rather, no in depth discussion, like you would have with a T. Just say whether you're in a good or bad space, without elaborating.


That way you two can shift the focus of your friendship, hang out, go shopping, have coffee, see a movie, light hearted things to get the two of you back on the same page, and your friendship back on track.


Maybe in future she will be better equipped to deal and share, maybe not, but at this rate, its best to draw a strict MH boundary in order to save the friendship.


My bf and I actually did this for a while, and it helped us immensely.