[SpasticBliss]

I posted a thread the other day Stimulant-based Treatment of Bipolar Disorder. It's amazing what this perceived risky method is doing for my life. Here's an amazing article on the topic, "Stimulants for adult bipolar disorder?"

I also posted about work problems. I'm always paranoid I'll get blamed for something I didn't do, due to the common knowledge in the office that I suffer from Bipolar Disorder and Generalized Anxiety Disorder.

After 14 years it happened for only the second time, I got blamed for a mistake that was not part of my job responsibility. I was yelled at by two supervisors and basically called an idiot. I am generally very meek and timid and for some reason, the situation wasn't making me nervous at all. I just calmly and firmly defended myself.

Jokes on them, I'm actually very strong. Especially when I'm backed into a corner. I'm no longer meek and passive and scared. It made them mad at first, to see they could no longer blame me for some of their mistakes, but I'm a Taurus, I don't back down. Now they've given up. They seem very confused and very nice.

Now, I sit back and watch life work in the funny way it does. They sure are making a lot of mistakes lately. Right in front of me. Pretty big mistakes. I get copied on emails pointing out things they've forgotten to do. I mean, I wish them all the best, but... it's just... Hmmmm.

[SpasticBliss]

I should also point out, my psychiatrist said I need to work on that last part and define who I am. The part that sounds like I might get pleasure out of their mistakes.

I totally empathize when they make a mistake. After a life of mistakes, when I see someone make a mistake, it hurts me inside. I've made so many mistakes and even the smallest ones can hurt and, at best, be incredibly embarrassing. But at that same time I find the irony fascinating. When they mess something up or delay something important, I think, "Dammit, that sucks, but you're human and we all make mistakes... just like me. And you saw my mistakes, now I see yours."

Is that bad of me? To even find the irony interesting or even a little humorous? I don't want them to make mistakes, I don't judge them as professionals how they operate to get their work done. I want to be firm and professional with them.

My therapist has documented the whole process and said it's real and to get out. But in the meantime, I just don't need any bad karma going on right now, so I need to know how you feel about this twist at work and if it's bad that I would get any sort of pleasure in the irony not the situation itself?