I'm really frustrated. I keep f***ing up at work because I can't concentrate.

People tell me things, but then I forget them... so when I go to ask for their help later, they say, "I already told you" or "I gave that you earlier". I just can't f***ing remember because my memory sucks.

I've also missed some meetings because my calendar doesn't have all the meeting invitations in it. Apparently people have been using weird calendars that are not Google Calendar, and I'm supposed to know that I need to import their calendar into Google calendar. Why not use Google Calendar if it's tied to your company email? The main calendar we're supposed to use is Google Calendar, which is why I use it. No one tells me these things, but apparently everyone else knows? Maybe I read about it and forgot it. Your guess is as good as mine.

I feel like telling them about my MIs, but I don't know if it's even worth it. The stigma may make the situation worse.

I'm going to make a better effort at work, though. My problems aren't 100% due to MIs. Some of them are my fault

[Th3reandback]

Originally Posted by bluebicycle

I'm really frustrated. I keep f***ing up at work because I can't concentrate.

People tell me things, but then I forget them... so when I go to ask for their help later, they say, "I already told you" or "I gave that you earlier". I just can't f***ing remember because my memory sucks.

I've also missed some meetings because my calendar doesn't have all the meeting invitations in it. Apparently people have been using weird calendars that are not Google Calendar, and I'm supposed to know that I need to import their calendar into Google calendar. Why not use Google Calendar if it's tied to your company email? The main calendar we're supposed to use is Google Calendar, which is why I use it. No one tells me these things, but apparently everyone else knows? Maybe I read about it and forgot it. Your guess is as good as mine.

I feel like telling them about my MIs, but I don't know if it's even worth it. The stigma may make the situation worse.

I'm going to make a better effort at work, though. My problems aren't 100% due to MIs. Some of them are my fault

I'm 21. Never have been able to hold a job more than a month or two. Sometimes only a week. I have self employed myself since the age of 15 and just couldn't get used to the idea of working for someone else. Recently dropped out of college to follow my intuition and work for myself. I could not be happier. I am free. I'd encourage anyone who is bipolar to explore their passions and hobbies as a means of making a living.

I think in your case it would give you control, and not as much pressure to keep up with other people's standards or expectations. Take care of yourself first!

I have a hard time with calendars and dates and stuff. And remembering things and the general expectations from others. My brain felt all bendy just from reading the list of things you do.... With meetings and people. I can see why work would be annoying.

[pirilin]

That's what I don't work anymore. And no time to play poker.

[hopeless2015]

Hugs, I'm struggling with work too, I can't stay focused. Sometimes I have to just get through 15 minutes at a time just to get through the day. Sorry your struggling right now!!

Sent from my SAMSUNG-SM-G930A using Tapatalk

[Gabyunbound]

Originally Posted by bluebicycle

I'm really frustrated. I keep f***ing up at work because I can't concentrate.

People tell me things, but then I forget them... so when I go to ask for their help later, they say, "I already told you" or "I gave that you earlier". I just can't f***ing remember because my memory sucks.

I've also missed some meetings because my calendar doesn't have all the meeting invitations in it. Apparently people have been using weird calendars that are not Google Calendar, and I'm supposed to know that I need to import their calendar into Google calendar. Why not use Google Calendar if it's tied to your company email? The main calendar we're supposed to use is Google Calendar, which is why I use it. No one tells me these things, but apparently everyone else knows? Maybe I read about it and forgot it. Your guess is as good as mine.

I feel like telling them about my MIs, but I don't know if it's even worth it. The stigma may make the situation worse.

I'm going to make a better effort at work, though. My problems aren't 100% due to MIs. Some of them are my fault

I have the SAME problem at work, sometimes I think they think I'm an idiot. My memory is S**T, I forget how to do things people have already explained to me and then I'm so embarrassed...

[raspberrytorte]

I have focusing issues too. I'm an airhead. I've always been one. I lose everything, get distracted and forget what I'm doing and do something else and twenty minutes later my daughter asks for her milk and it's sitting on the counter and I just forgot to give it to her. I'm just all over the place.

You have ADHD, yes? Have you been prescribed something for it? Maybe that would help.

I have an Adderall XR prescription that I haven't picked up yet. I've been messing with my meds lately though and have managed to unintentionally cause a depression.

I was going to try my prescription next week.

But yeah, I know I need to do something about the concentration. Part of the concentration problem is the depression, which is my fault.

[raspberrytorte]

Why do you think the depression is your fault?

I messed with my meds.

Firstly, I had to get off Latuda because it caused my cholesterol to skyrocket. Then I reduced my Lamictal dosage from 300mg down to 200mg. I'm also taking a statin which apparently affects the way my psych meds are metabolized.

All this happened 2 days ago.

edit: typo... 2 days ago, not 3

[raspberrytorte]

Are they replacing the latuda with anything?

Maybe going back up on lamictal will help. I only went down 50mg with mine once and after a week I was depressed and weird feeling and went back up and felt better.

Don't know yet. I have my next pdoc appointment on Tuesday.

I don't want any APs that cause drowsiness or weight gain. Usually the ones that cause weight gain cause like 60 lbs weight gain. If it were 5-10 lbs, then I'd be fine... but not 60 lbs.

I'm sure going up on Lamictal will help, but it'll take a while. It'll take like 4 weeks (if I want to avoid SJS).

[Nammu]

I have that problem...I work with 3-5 year olds, names are so hard for me and....oh my gosh, it's horrible when I can't remember their name. Whatever it is that causes this, yeah it makes you feel like an idiot....but we're not. It's just short term memory that sucks

[Gabyunbound]

My pdoc, who specializes in BP, told me that people with BP tend to have memory problems.

[raspberrytorte]

Originally Posted by bluebicycle

Don't know yet. I have my next pdoc appointment on Tuesday.

I don't want any APs that cause drowsiness or weight gain. Usually the ones that cause weight gain cause like 60 lbs weight gain. If it were 5-10 lbs, then I'd be fine... but not 60 lbs.

I'm sure going up on Lamictal will help, but it'll take a while. It'll take like 4 weeks (if I want to avoid SJS).

I understand about the AP thing. I hate drowsiness and weight gain. I didn't gain weight on geodon. I actually lost weight. It made me drowsy though and gave me heart problems and sucked. But maybe it would work for you. When I was on seroquel I gained fifteen pounds. Better than sixty. But it made me tired, grumpy, and blunted my personality, and I looked horrible and bloated on it. Haldol didn't make me gain weight and it didn't make me drowsy, but that's not an atypical, and it gave me bad akathesia (or however you spell it).

I don't know man. **** APs. Seriously. I hate them all!

But I hope you find something that works.

Hugs!

[Manic Trance]

I have always had a difficult time in groups of any kind. I am too intense and I annoy people, and get under people's skin, and after a while I am just paranoid around everyone all the time. I feel unappreciated and unseen, and I end up wanting to quit everything. Miraculously I don't, but it compromises my experience and I worry about it. It is hard being bipolar at work cuz the hypomanic edge leads to good ideas, but the rest of the illness people can do without.
Dunno what to do...

Originally Posted by raspberrytorte

I understand about the AP thing. I hate drowsiness and weight gain. I didn't gain weight on geodon. I actually lost weight. It made me drowsy though and gave me heart problems and sucked. But maybe it would work for you. When I was on seroquel I gained fifteen pounds. Better than sixty. But it made me tired, grumpy, and blunted my personality, and I looked horrible and bloated on it. Haldol didn't make me gain weight and it didn't make me drowsy, but that's not an atypical, and it gave me bad akathesia (or however you spell it).

I don't know man. **** APs. Seriously. I hate them all!

But I hope you find something that works.

Hugs!

Doesn't Geodon cause hair loss in some people too? I'd rather be fat than lose all my hair.

I dunno... I feel like most APs have horrible side effects, so I don't know if I want another AP. Latuda is the one AP with minimal side effects, but I can't take it anymore unless I up my Lipitor dosage, but then... Lipitor affects the way drugs are metabolized in the liver, which means most of my meds will be less effective with a higher Lipitor dose. And with a less effective Latuda, I'll have to up my Latuda dose... but a higher Latuda dosage might be "strong enough" to trump the effects of Lipitor.

I might ask my pdoc about going AP-free.