[Gabyunbound]

Has anyone experienced any psychotic symptoms (i.e. hallucinations, paranoia) during a depression phase?

Yeah. I had people "talking" to me and I "heard" someone recording me with a video camera.

There was one time I was sleeping and then a voice said to me, "Wake up! Wake up!" It got my attention, but then I ignored it... Right after that, the voice said, "What are you doing? WAKE UP."

That was weird

My delusional thinking begins in mania as far as I can tell. It has followed me into depression. My meds help with delusional thinking. My delusional stuff has to do with being stalked by evil organizations who are trying to either force me to toughen up and join them, or they will torment me. I get so confused but always know I don't want to be evil and don't want to join the stalkers because I hate them and what they do.

[Th3reandback]

Originally Posted by ElsaMars

My delusional thinking begins in mania as far as I can tell. It has followed me into depression. My meds help with delusional thinking. My delusional stuff has to do with being stalked by evil organizations who are trying to either force me to toughen up and join them, or they will torment me. I get so confused but always know I don't want to be evil and don't want to join the stalkers because I hate them and what they do.

Wow...that's exactly what I experienced.

In my heart no matter how delusional I was I knew I was "good" and not evil and had to fight for God not the devil or anything else. But that lead me to be aggressive at points where people were treating me very poorly (guards) as I thought I was supposed to fight back for the sake of good.

I've never gotten violent. I'm a passive person and believe in passive resolution. But my voice gets loud and commanding and I've been mistreated by a guard who mistook it for agression. I'm sorry you go through that too. It always morphs into something slightly different and all the signs tell me it's true this time. Everyone's facial expressions, tone, body language becomes hostile and evil sounding. Very sinister. It's very scary but I go someplace alone and don't talk unless I have to. It helps. I just get stuck in my head and time passes.

[Th3reandback]

Originally Posted by ElsaMars

I've never gotten violent. I'm a passive person and believe in passive resolution. But my voice gets loud and commanding and I've been mistreated by a guard who mistook it for agression. I'm sorry you go through that too. It always morphs into something slightly different and all the signs tell me it's true this time. Everyone's facial expressions, tone, body language becomes hostile and evil sounding. Very sinister. It's very scary but I go someplace alone and don't talk unless I have to. It helps. I just get stuck in my head and time passes.

I wasn't necessarily violent, I never tried to hurt anybody else. But I certainly fought being restrained. The facial expressions were the same for me as well. I can't believe someone else has gone through that. Mine lasted for 3 weeks unfortunately. Though, I think the stress and trauma of being in jail really made the psychosis 100x worse than it should have been.

I got better as soon as I got home away from the hospital. Not 100% for at least a month. Even on meds it was so bad for so long. My family has always been my safe people, but my husband and mother both ended up with those weird smirky evil expressions for awhile. That was really weird. That is actually what helped me stay a bit grounded and feel I was not right. I still didn't want to look at them too much. My sons stayed safe and I never felt they were in on it. I felt scared for them and thought the evil was going to hurt them to get to me.

Since you relate to what I said I will tell you another part that happened with my paranoia. When I first started reading BP forums, I thought they were there to make fun of me and how I behave and think sometimes. I thought people who knew me joined an organization to set up these forums to make fun of me. The truth was, I was just relating to so much and my mind had a hard time processing how many other people suffer with the same stuff. At least we have each other right? (((Hugs)))

[Atypical_Disaster]

My depressive episodes always have psychotic features. I don't know why that is except the universe hates me.

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[scatterbrained04]

Yes, I only experience it when depressed

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[Blaire]

I know the evil smirk you're talking about. I had that during my worst mania when I crashed into a mixed episode on the way down. I stopped going to the store because for some reason that's where I could see everyone looking at me with that smirk. I remember that look, and it still creeps me out to think about it.

[BipolaRNurse]

When I had the depressive episode that put me in the hospital, I saw black and grey cats running back and forth under the linen supply cart in the ER. It was the first time I'd ever experienced any psychotic symptoms with depression; it only happened during mania before. Haven't had any of that since, thank God.

[passionfruit3]

I had it after my first suicide attempt it was when I first started to hear the voices .they told me after i woke up unscathed from taking ibuprofen that I was a failure and that theyd help me get it right . cause the consuquences for not getting it right is that my family and friends would suffer and eventually be destroyed by the evil inside of me so for the longest of time since fourteen ive been trying to end my life

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