[earthangel1]

I have held full time jobs, mostly in manufacturing. I didn't mind them that much. But after being worn out from depression, I would quit. When I had unmedicated bipolar depression in high school, I dropped out of school (big mistake) and worked at a grocery store for a year. So when my family calls me lazy, I salute a big **** you. I also worked at homeless shelters both in Toronto and Kansas City, sometimes putting in 60 hours a week. But that was before medications. Right now I feel fine, have energy, but just don't want to work. Younkers is hiring where I live and my mom said if I get a part time job she'll match what I make. The problem is I just don't want to work. Those jobs at the homeless shelter were 2 years ago but it's like I'm still worn out from them. I put so much time and love into people there. I would drive a big van to the zoo and spend my days babysitting grown men, which I loved doing, but it was hard because some of them were unmedicated schizophrenic and bipolar and one time on a trip to the world war 1 memorial one man, Jacob, started screaming expletives at me because the voices in his head told him we were supposed to go the other way. I loved my job and loved the people and yes I'm rambling. But that time of unmedicated depression hit me hard. And I just don't want to work.

[Daonnachd]

Depression certainly takes a toll on us in ways others cannot understand. From that failure to comprehend comes criticism and judgement whittling away at our self-worth.

All the best to you as you weather this.

Have you considered applying for SSDI? If you've had trouble sustaining employment you may be disabled.

[LadyShadow]

Yes SSDI may be the answer. I have thought about going back to work part-time because I can't handle the stress of a full-time job. Society puts so much pressure on us to work so damn hard, no wonder people are breaking down. I worked my butt off for years with undiagnosed and unmedicated bipolar and it was the hardest time in my life.

I was drinking almost every day, and crying my eyes out every night. I was in abusive relationships and wasn't taking care of myself. At least now things make more sense.