For example:

Lamictal got rid of my aggression, which is awesome because I used to be very violent and angry. It was so bad that I've put holes through doors, physically and verbally attacked my parents, and destroy my belongings, like my phone, my laptop, etc.. I've also harassed other people and verbally attacked them.

On the downside, my depressions have gotten more severe, even though my meds have reduced the duration of my depressive episodes. Nowadays, I ALWAYS get suicidal ideation no matter what, and I almost always buy "supplies". (Before, I would only get suicidal ideation about half the time, and I would never go out to buy supplies.) I've had more attempts in the past year than I've had between the ages of 17 and 23.

[lacerta]

Originally Posted by bluebicycle

For example:

Lamictal got rid of my aggression, which is awesome because I used to be very violent and angry. It was so bad that I've put holes through doors, physically and verbally attacked my parents, and destroy my belongings, like my phone, my laptop, etc.. I've also harassed other people and verbally attacked them.

On the downside, my depressions have gotten more severe, even though my meds have reduced the duration of my depressive episodes. Nowadays, I ALWAYS get suicidal ideation no matter what, and I almost always buy "supplies". (Before, I would only get suicidal ideation about half the time, and I would never go out to buy supplies.) I've had more attempts in the past year than I've had between the ages of 17 and 23.

It does not sound like the right coctail of meds for you. Can you ask for change?

I did not see med improvements on depressivness. APs helped with anxiety. Sleep pills help me to get into mania. Bad sides - I've gain a lot of weight withing 3 years and I'm no prediabetic.

Originally Posted by lacerta

It does not sound like the right coctail of meds for you. Can you ask for change?

I did not see med improvements on depressivness. APs helped with anxiety. Sleep pills help me to get into mania. Bad sides - I've gain a lot of weight withing 3 years and I'm no prediabetic.

Thanks for your concern

My pdoc and I are still working on finding the right cocktail for me, but I think we're getting close to finding a cocktail that works pretty well.

I've only started taking meds since September 2015, so I haven't had a lot of time to try out different meds.

But anyways, sorry to hear about the depression and weight gain. I can imagine that's no fun. Are you currently on meds which cause weight gain? Can you opt for something that doesn't have weight gain as a side effect, or maybe take something like Metformin?

[lacerta]

Originally Posted by bluebicycle

Thanks for your concern

My pdoc and I are still working on finding the right cocktail for me, but I think we're getting close to finding a cocktail that works pretty well.

I've only started taking meds since September 2015, so I haven't had a lot of time to try out different meds.

But anyways, sorry to hear about the depression and weight gain. I can imagine that's no fun. Are you currently on meds which cause weight gain? Can you opt for something that doesn't have weight gain as a side effect, or maybe take something like Metformin?

Take the time you need to find the med combo. My first year was ***, terrible. It was hard to believe I will ever stabilise. Now it's a lot better.
Thanks for asking - yeah, I got meds changed - depakote to lamotrix, ditched APs, got Metformin added. Now I'm dropping weight slowly. I wish all of that was done way earlier before it got too bad. Though at that time being stable was my priority, becoming fat like hell was just a side effect. Now I feel so sorry for myself and for pdoc not seeing how awful it gets and suggesting to change. I needed obgyn and endocrinologist to suggest med change.

[Unrigged64072835]

My current BP meds have kept em out of depression and mania, so that's good.

My meds, though, have caused me to gain a lot of weight, aggravated my cholesterol and blood sugar issues, and have given me prolonged QT rhythm in my heart. At this point I'm just monitoring things so they don't get out of hand, and I'm taking extra meds to mitigate some of the side effects.

[Christopher1990]

they've helped me sleep.

[Victoria'smom]

Ap took away my ED voice, made me less paranoid , less agitated, no longer get homicidal thoughts and who knows what else. However my depression always brings si thoughts now.

[gina_re]

You all can get mad at me and this fine because I'm probably about to ghost again anyway. But what is with all these does your bipolar do this that and the other questions? Yes we all have bipolar disorder and all have different experiences. Why must we question every single thing about it? I thought this was a support forum, not a manual for bipolar disorder.

[pirilin]

I'm waitin'.

Originally Posted by gina_re

You all can get mad at me and this fine because I'm probably about to ghost again anyway. But what is with all these does your bipolar do this that and the other questions? Yes we all have bipolar disorder and all have different experiences. Why must we question every single thing about it? I thought this was a support forum, not a manual for bipolar disorder.

no, i'm not mad. i won't get mad.

i don't mean to make this whole forum a manual for BP, so i'm sorry for that.

i don't want to ruin anyone's experience; not my intention. i was mostly trying to create conversation starters, but you're right... this is a support forum and i'm probably annoying everyone and ruining everyone's experience

[venusss]

Originally Posted by bluebicycle

no, i'm not mad. i won't get mad.

i don't mean to make this whole forum a manual for BP, so i'm sorry for that.

i don't want to ruin anyone's experience; not my intention. i was mostly trying to create conversation starters, but you're right... this is a support forum and i'm probably annoying everyone and ruining everyone's experience

Nah, keep doing this, these threads are interesting and make one think. It's interesting to read experience of others and one may consider things that didn't occur to them before.

I don't always reply, but I read most of your threads.

[gina_re]

Originally Posted by bluebicycle

no, i'm not mad. i won't get mad.

i don't mean to make this whole forum a manual for BP, so i'm sorry for that.

i don't want to ruin anyone's experience; not my intention. i was mostly trying to create conversation starters, but you're right... this is a support forum and i'm probably annoying everyone and ruining everyone's experience

No need to be dramatic. So I'll let this be what it is. Everyone enjoy and maybe I'll try again in the future.

Originally Posted by gina_re

No need to be dramatic. So I'll let this be what it is. Everyone enjoy and maybe I'll try again in the future.

no, i honestly don't mean to be dramatic. it's a genuine apology and nothing is meant to be dramatized

i'm sorry if i'm the reason you're leaving, but good luck with everything

[raspberrytorte]

I'm feeling confusion, gina.

You blocked blue. Why are you reading her threads?

[xRavenx]

Lamictal has helped nipped things in the bud to the point where it prevented symptoms from turning into a full-blown episode. I still do get episodes sometimes, but they were more frequent before and generally more intense. I also believe it contributed to me being able to cut down a lot on drinking. So it's a good stabilizer for me overall. Seroquel helps a lot with my sleep, which helps control the mania. The downside is that sometimes my mind is not as sharp since it makes me sleepy and a bit foggy from time to time. Not the best thing when I'm at work, although I manage. Same with Klonopin.

Personally, I like these threads. They do get you thinking, and the forum gives us the opportunity to chat about these things with others who can relate and provides a safe haven to be able to do that. It also helps me gain insight into how BP affects me to be able to identify some of these things. Keep the threads coming, bluebicycle

[Unrigged64072835]

I like these threads as well. I can participate more than usual. Keep them coming, Blue.

[pirilin]

Blue for Prez.

[OctobersBlackRose]

I believe they are helping, my Ability keeps me from hearing voices (at Least turns down the volume of them), Lessing the paranoia, and delusions, and supposed to be good for the irritability and agitation.

My Lamictal helps keep me less aggressive, and has an antidepressant effect, idk if it helps with the mania or not, but I do feel more.evened out when I take it, well take both meds actually.

Even though they're both for more.on the depressive side of the BP moods, I do notice they keep me out of manic/hypomanic episodes.

My only issues is that I'm in a depressive episode (possibly an agitated depression) since late April, early May so 3-4 months. Coupled with grief from.my Grandpas passing, making thing worse. And the meds aren't really helping too much right now, they're just making things tolerable. My psychiatrist and I are working on tweaking my meds, and I see her August 8th, so I'll discuss it with her then, she already knows some of my depressive symptoms, but not all of them yet, I just hope she doesn't chalk it all out as just tried since this depression has lasted about 4months...

But yeah I think the meds are helping to some extent.

[OctobersBlackRose]

I also like.these threads Blue, they make me think about my owm BP and how it affects me. Keep these threads coming.

[Holdingbacktyrs]

Nothing wrong with this kind of conversation starter. Not annoying at all!

I think Gina you are not being very nice today. If you don't like the question, don't bother to read the post. Geez!

[raspberrytorte]

Low blow, gina. Low blow.

[MusicLover82]

I like your threads, too, Blue. I don't always respond because I'm busy and my time here is limited, but I think your conversation starters are great.

How have my meds helped me? They keep me functioning and keeping a job and maintaining good friendships. Without my meds, I don't think I could do either.

How have my meds hurt me? Stupid side effects. Really weird ones that freak me out and make me feel like I'm having a stroke sometimes. But I've figured all that out now and they've gone away. Oh, and yeah, there's the over 100 lbs that I gained after initially starting meds. But I've lost a lot of that since and a lot of the weight was my fault for letting myself go at one point.