Since lithium: irritible, constantly finding fault, some depression

**************maybe a trigger***************I hate holidays. Nothing is open. I need to call the clinic I'm supposedly transferring to and get an appointment with my previous pdoc, before he was transferred away from my clinic. I feel 90% out of control. Since lithium started about 6 weeks ago I am irritable, constantly finding fault, some depression. I suddenly feel very alone, too My b/f left this morning to visit his family. He wanted me to go but I misunderstood, thinking he wanted me there for a week, and I wanted to go only 3 days. By the time we figured that out,the price for my ticket had more than doubled, so I didn't go. Which is really fine because I hate traveling anyway, I printed out a list of options to avoid/fight off "distress intolerance." That's me, all right -- I do not tolerate distress, and am feeling attacked by the world around me. I wrote elsewhere here on the subject of "Cognitive Dissonance," and how I experience that as culture shock, trying to figure out reality in 2016. I don't understand what reality is these days. I am not equipped to accept the unclear language people in the cyber world use. And today I experienced it in the large airport where I saw my b/f off on the plane. Besides the intolerable security screening, I was going to go home on public transit. I could see the transit from the windows of the gate waiting area. So after said Goodbye/BonVoyage to my b/f I walked a long, log way trying o find a door to get out there. The hallway came to an end -- no door. The directions I received from the airport customer phone were incomprehensible. I finally limited her to ONE THING - the first thing I had to do. I ended up asking about 5 different people, going up and down escalators, and finally someone told me that nobody ever should have told me to come upstairs at all. This is my life!!!!!! I'm so screwed up because of all this non-sense. I keep on distracting myself, as one is instructed to do to get out of this distress intolerance. But the minute stop doing the direction, it alll comes back in a rush. Hello anyone who reads this, and thanks for reading it.

Wow, that sounds incredibly stressful. I don't have any awesome advice, I hope you feel better. Thank you for venting, sometimes especially just doing that helps. Please take care of yourself.

((((( FLOWERBELLS )))))

Peace, Comfort, Joy


WC

Thank you gina, and Wild Coyote, you are both very sweet. Thanks for your good wishes. Well, at least tomorrow will be a good day for me. I see my therp early about Distress Tolerance; then Yoga; then I am going to a meetup group I've started. This is the first meeting of the MeetUp. I hope some people come. It has five "members" including me, but nobody but me has RSVPd.

6 wks might be a bit early yet regarding the lithium. There's hope yet.

Wow, what a nightmare at the airport. Pat yourself on the back for getting through it.

Thanks, justafriend, you are a friend indeed! The thing is, such an airport experience would not have been hard on anyone else! There were mobs of people walking around without a care in the world. Thanks for the tip about lithium. When I see my old/new pdoc, I guess I won't demand a change. The pdoc I switched off of has rx/d 25 mg of lamictal, to raise to 50 mg in a week or two (I forget which time period). I haven't picked up the rx because I want to talk to my new/old pdoc first. I just hope I can get an appt with him this week. The one I switched off said he wanted to see me on Sept 23 because the Li would have kicked in by then. But I cancelled that one b/c I'm chancing pdocs.