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#1
Sep 09, 2016, 01:05 AM
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Hi everyone, yesterday I had a bad fight with my girlfriend. She started the fight by constantly jabbing my hotspots. But then I took over and wrote her
a seething letter filled with really mean things. I went to far and I'm wonder how I should act around her. What I do when I want to soften her, show I'm sorry. I'm a man so I'm clueless. Any ideas? |
 Anonymous37846, vjdragonfly, Wild Coyote, xRavenx
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#2
Sep 09, 2016, 06:16 AM
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Apologize to her and mean it
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| Anonymous37846, Wild Coyote
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 Wild Coyote
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#3
Sep 09, 2016, 07:27 AM
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Quote:
<this> It's about the only chance you have.
__________________
Meds: Latuda, Lamictal XR, Vyvanse, Seroquel, Klonopin Supplements: Monster Energy replacement.  Also DLPA, tyrosine, glutamine, and tryptophan
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#4
Sep 10, 2016, 04:52 PM
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Like stated, first and foremost, a heart felt apology. Second off, try to never do it again. Nothing worse then to forgive someone and they turn around and do it to you again.
__________________
Be who you are and say what you feel because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind. ~ Dr. Seuss |
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#5
Sep 10, 2016, 05:30 PM
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Thanks to all. I'm working on improving myself. Also, I'm going to start a new thread with a more accurate description of my problem.
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| xRavenx
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#6
Sep 10, 2016, 07:57 PM
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It's good that you are recognizing the need to take responsibility. Most people need to be shown through actions rather than just words that an apology is sincere....so do not panic if it takes time before you start seeing results, but I promise you that patience with the process can go a long way and benefit you and your relationship significantly. Expressing your feelings and apologizing that you have gone too far is a start. Writing an apology too can be a meaningful gesture.....getting a blank card to write a sweet message on, maybe taking her to dinner or making dinner if you want. Also, simple statements like, "If I could take it back and act differently, I would have." Or maybe tell her what you would have done differently if a conflict were to arise between the two of you since nearly every couple has arguments from time to time.
I am uncertain how long it takes for her to cool off, but it is normal if for a little while things seem strained for a while. In most situations, partners move on to accept this and things get back to normal with a little bit of time. If not, maybe a few couples' therapy sessions might be helpful, or she can sit in a session with you if you go to therapy. |
| bizi
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#7
Sep 10, 2016, 08:18 PM
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Thank you so much for your input.
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| bizi, xRavenx
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#8
Sep 11, 2016, 12:10 AM
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Like I said in your other thread, should you two really stay in the abusive relationship? I to have a temper and I know what to say to hurt people. I can get nasty. It's like a loss of control. But I would be exhausted and turned off if me and my SO were constantly fighting. Btw you may want to ask the audience in the "relationships and communications" sub forum too.
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| Reply |
This is an old thread. You probably should not post your reply to it, as the original poster is unlikely to see it.|
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