[jtassar93]

So it turns out that my sister is going to be staying with one of her friends for awhile. There she'll have access to moral support and rides to and from pdoc and therapist appointments. I don't know what to do without her... she's my rock. She helps with all my bipolar problems since she knows how I feel. I have no one to tell me what voices and hallucinations are real or not now... I don't know how long she'll be gone. And I have no friends like that to go to. The suicidal thoughts are growing and I don't know what to do. I don't have a plan or anything like that so it's just mild for now.

[JustJace2u]

Sending lots of hugs your way.

(((Hugs))). You've got us and we will try and help as much as possible. I wish you had someplace safe, with rides and support to go to. Perhaps you can discuss this with your doctor? ((Hugs))

[jtassar93]

Originally Posted by ElsaMars

(((Hugs))). You've got us and we will try and help as much as possible. I wish you had someplace safe, with rides and support to go to. Perhaps you can discuss this with your doctor? ((Hugs))

Thanks. I wish I had somewhere to go too. I really wish my sister hadn't left but she did what was best for her for the time being. I can discuss it with my doctor. Perhaps we can work out to where my appointments are on my moms days off. That way we don't have to keep rescheduling. And maybe my apps will be closer together. My step dad refuses to take me.

[Victoria'smom]

I really think you need to look into the housing authority and get Medicaid so you can get rides to your appointments. It sucks being on assistance but at least your medical needs would be taken care of.

I second mm's suggestion. Try and get on Medicaid and see if you can get rides to appts. I wish you felt comfortable telling your mom what's going on. Hugs...

[jtassar93]

Thanks guys. I'll look into Medicaid on the kindle but more extensively once I get my computer. My mom is even trying to get my step dad to get me a phone for emergencies and what not. I could also use it to look things up when I'm away from home. The rides would be nice but I don't think I could move out. My sister is gone for now but she won't be forever. I really rely on her for many things.

[jtassar93]

What exactly is Medicaid? Is it free? Sorry I don't know how these things work lol.

[Victoria'smom]

Medicaid is free for low income but I believe you're still under your parents insurance so you'd have to find out if you qualify.

[jtassar93]

Originally Posted by Miguel'smom

Medicaid is free for low income but I believe you're still under your parents insurance so you'd have to find out if you qualify.

Thanks! Yes I am still under my parents insurance. We make some, but not a lot. I wonder if we qualify. What should I do if I don't? Are there other programs available?

[Victoria'smom]

There are other programs like housing, food ect but you have to be on your own for many of them. Your health is most important right now. If you can get medicaid you'll be able to get to your appointments. SSI may be an option if you're unable to work but that's usually a last resort thing.

SSI is not necessarily a last resort. It's protection and independence which some people require to get better. I don't know your whole situation but from the things I am hearing, you need it. I would get a free consult with an attorney to discuss it. They offer phone appointments which will be helpful in your situation.

[jtassar93]

Originally Posted by Miguel'smom

There are other programs like housing, food ect but you have to be on your own for many of them. Your health is most important right now. If you can get medicaid you'll be able to get to your appointments. SSI may be an option if you're unable to work but that's usually a last resort thing.

I'm definitely not on my own and don't plan to be for awhile. Hopefully I can get Medicaid. It would be a big help. I might try SSI. I'm unable to work myself so maybe.

[jtassar93]

Originally Posted by ElsaMars

SSI is not necessarily a last resort. It's protection and independence which some people require to get better. I don't know your whole situation but from the things I am hearing, you need it. I would get a free consult with an attorney to discuss it. They offer phone appointments which will be helpful in your situation.

Oh really? That's interesting. Could my mom do the discussion with the attorney?

Originally Posted by jtassar93

Oh really? That's interesting. Could my mom do the discussion with the attorney?

That I don't know unfortunately. Look up lawyers who specialize in SSI. You will tell them your issues and they will tell you your likelihood of success. Come to think of it, I might be wrong about the free part. it might not be free at most places but if you find someone hungry enough for cases, they might provide you with some information on the process. Your mom could probably figure out how to apply for you. You can do it online for SSDI and maybe SSI too. I think In your situation you should discuss it with your doctor and get someone to help you. I can't promise you would be approved but with what you've said here I can't imagine why not. (((Hugs)))

[jtassar93]

Originally Posted by ElsaMars

That I don't know unfortunately. Look up lawyers who specialize in SSI. You will tell them your issues and they will tell you your likelihood of success. Come to think of it, I might be wrong about the free part. it might not be free at most places but if you find someone hungry enough for cases, they might provide you with some information on the process. Your mom could probably figure out how to apply for you. You can do it online for SSDI and maybe SSI too. I think In your situation you should discuss it with your doctor and get someone to help you. I can't promise you would be approved but with what you've said here I can't imagine why not. (((Hugs)))

Oh alright. I'll have my mom look up lawyers. I'll have her talk and if they don't let her I guess I will. As scary as that sounds, I think I can do it. If it's not free I hope it isn't too expensive or my step dad won't go for it. That's also why I'm afraid of going to the hospital. I'm scared he'll find out and take me out of there. I'll ask my doctor about it. What if I get on it and a few months later I get a job or go to school? I'm planning on trying to go to online school this spring. Will that affect it?

Originally Posted by jtassar93

Oh alright. I'll have my mom look up lawyers. I'll have her talk and if they don't let her I guess I will. As scary as that sounds, I think I can do it. If it's not free I hope it isn't too expensive or my step dad won't go for it. That's also why I'm afraid of going to the hospital. I'm scared he'll find out and take me out of there. I'll ask my doctor about it. What if I get on it and a few months later I get a job or go to school? I'm planning on trying to go to online school this spring. Will that affect it?

The job will affect it but they will just discontinue it if you no longer qualify I believe. I don't know about school. A lawyer should be able to answer these questions for you. I have no advise about the step dad. You are a legal adult in the eyes of the law and I don't think he could remove you against your will. ((Hugs)))

[jtassar93]

Originally Posted by ElsaMars

The job will affect it but they will just discontinue it if you no longer qualify I believe. I don't know about school. A lawyer should be able to answer these questions for you. I have no advise about the step dad. You are a legal adult in the eyes of the law and I don't think he could remove you against your will. ((Hugs)))

Ah I see. I don't see myself having a job anytime soon anyways. I'll make sure to ask about the school thing. I hope that's true about my step dad. I just hope he doesn't kick me out later if I stay in the hospital against his will.

Originally Posted by jtassar93

Ah I see. I don't see myself having a job anytime soon anyways. I'll make sure to ask about the school thing. I hope that's true about my step dad. I just hope he doesn't kick me out later if I stay in the hospital against his will.

That is so sad you must worry about this. So very, very sad. (((Hugs)))

[jtassar93]

Originally Posted by ElsaMars

That is so sad you must worry about this. So very, very sad. (((Hugs)))

Unfortunately. He feels like im old enough to make it on my own now. Since he feeds,clothes,and keeps a roof over my head. He draws the line at paying for my sister and I's meds. He might keep his cool if my mom talks him down. Hopefully I won't have that to worry about while in th hospital (If my docs say I need it)

You definately need to discuss SSI with your doctor. You need to ask them their honest opinion. Make sure you tell them everything you've talked about here and your living environment and how much importance your current care-givers are giving to your mental illness. Print your posts out and bring them in. Don't leave anything you've talked about here out. I think your current situation is a disaster (I'm sorry to be so blunt)

[jtassar93]

Originally Posted by ElsaMars

You definately need to discuss SSI with your doctor. You need to ask them their honest opinion. Make sure you tell them everything you've talked about here and your living environment and how much importance your current care-givers are giving to your mental illness. Print your posts out and bring them in. Don't leave anything you've talked about here out. I think your current situation is a disaster (I'm sorry to be so blunt)

Be blunt! I don't mind at all. I will definitely talk to my doctor about it. I'll have to bring in my moms kindle with all my posts since we don't have a printer .. I know, excuse after excuse lol. I'll either ask this visit or the next one. Since I have A LOT to discuss this time.

Originally Posted by jtassar93

Be blunt! I don't mind at all. I will definitely talk to my doctor about it. I'll have to bring in my moms kindle with all my posts since we don't have a printer .. I know, excuse after excuse lol. I'll either ask this visit or the next one. Since I have A LOT to discuss this time.

I'm glad you don't mind me saying that. I worried you would think I was putting down your family. I put no blame on anyone and think your family is doing what they think is best. They obviously do not recognize the seriousness of your situation for whatever reason. You are not in an enviroment conducive to your wellness. You need professional guidance and you're not getting the care you need to make progress I fear.

[jtassar93]

Originally Posted by ElsaMars

I'm glad you don't mind me saying that. I worried you would think I was putting down your family. I put no blame on anyone and think your family is doing what they think is best. They obviously do not recognize the seriousness of your situation for whatever reason. You are not in an enviroment conducive to your wellness. You need professional guidance and you're not getting the care you need to make progress I fear.

Oh yeah, it's alright. My family doesn't know the extent of my illness, not sure if they'd care. They might just go in denial lol. My mom takes me to appointments and my step dad pays for my pills. I think that's as far as they'll go. My mom won't even sit with me during my sessions. I've gotten used to it though. I'm now comfortable with both my T and my pdoc. Well as comfortable asking I can be, I still don't talk much and bring in notes. But at least I don't have a panic attack every time I go in there. I do need professional help and am trying really hard to get it. That's one of the main reasons my sister left.

Originally Posted by jtassar93

Oh yeah, it's alright. My family doesn't know the extent of my illness, not sure if they'd care. They might just go in denial lol. My mom takes me to appointments and my step dad pays for my pills. I think that's as far as they'll go. My mom won't even sit with me during my sessions. I've gotten used to it though. I'm now comfortable with both my T and my pdoc. Well as comfortable asking I can be, I still don't talk much and bring in notes. But at least I don't have a panic attack every time I go in there. I do need professional help and am trying really hard to get it. That's one of the main reasons my sister left.

I usually need to be escorted to all appointments. I don't really drive much and have had a phobia of being in cars since childhood....it gets very severe. I go into my appointments alone though. Except medical appointments where I need an extra set of ears or when I'm very unwell and paranoid I need my husband in the room

Sorry you deal with that anxiety too. It really stinks. I hope you can be open with your parents someday and they will be supportive (((hugs)))