[JustJace2u]

So, my new therapist wants me to work on being kind to myself. How the heck do I do that when I'm so used to making everyone else happy and not worrying about myself? My 'homework' is that for every act of kindness I show to someone else I'm supposed to give myself 2 acts of kindness. I know I need to work on myself, but man oh man is this gonna be a challenge.

[Yours_Truly]

You can do it. I'll be rooting for you.

I have to admit, it does sound hard.

[JustJace2u]

Originally Posted by Yours_Truly

You can do it. I'll be rooting for you.

I have to admit, it does sound hard.

I don't know what I'll do.

[Unrigged64072835]

That does sound tough. But it's doable.

[Yours_Truly]

Maybe first figure out exactly what some of the acts of kindness will be, for instance, complimenting yourself after you have been kind to someone else, "Wow, that was really great of me to be so kind." or treating yourself to a special treat like ice cream or chocolate.

Also, I wouldn't worry too much about always coming up with 2 every time. Your T just wants to make sure you really try.

Give me a $100 bill and give yourself two $100 bills. 1 act for me, 2 acts for you

No, but seriously... I'll think of a more serious reply

My offer still stands though

You need to connect with yourself and figure out what you want. If you are used to getting your needs met by helping others, you disconnect from self and do not even know what you want or what makes you happy when it doesn't involve helping another.

For me I like bubble baths, bath bombs, Epsom salts with nice fragrance, candles....pampering myself. Maybe a pedicure or a nice meal. A good book or playing with my dogs. I have lots of little things I can do for me.

The question is, what do YOU like? (((Hugs)))

[Nammu]

An act of kindness could be to buy some really nice lotion and use it when being kind to yourself, give yourself a foot massage. Take the time to listen to your favorite music, read your favorite book or magazine. Taking a quiet time just for you when you can unplug from life's interruptions. Box a box of expensive chocolates and treat yourself to one a day. Preparing a meal that you like and using candles just because. Smile at yourself in a mirror. Give yourself a hug.

[JustJace2u]

Originally Posted by bluebicycle

Give me a $100 bill and give yourself two $100 bills. 1 act for me, 2 acts for you

No, but seriously... I'll think of a more serious reply

My offer still stands though

ROFLMAO!!! You crack me up

[JustJace2u]

Originally Posted by ElsaMars

You need to connect with yourself and figure out what you want. If you are used to getting your needs met by helping others, you disconnect from self and do not even know what you want or what makes you happy when it doesn't involve helping another.

For me I like bubble baths, bath bombs, Epsom salts with nice fragrance, candles....pampering myself. Maybe a pedicure or a nice meal. A good book or playing with my dogs. I have lots of little things I can do for me.

The question is, what do YOU like? (((Hugs)))

We discussed this and I just can't come up with anything. As I told my t, I spend so much time worrying about everyone else that I don't think about myself.

Start trying things and see what you like or connect with. Explore new horizons.....are you make or female?

[JustJace2u]

Originally Posted by ElsaMars

Start trying things and see what you like or connect with. Explore new horizons.....are you make or female?

I'm a female

[Wild Coyote]

Some types of acts of kindness to oneself:

- Exercise
- Healthy eating
- Relaxing bath
- Massage
- Contact a friend you have been missing or enjoy
- Treat yourself to your favorite meal
- Manicure/Pedicure, haircut/style/color
- Candles and relaxing atmosphere
- Purchase a warm scarf, new hat, new earrings, warm socks, thermal underwear, special PJs, gloves/mittens, special piece of clothing/jewelry, other
- Treat yourself to a book, a movie or to a museum, maybe new music
- Treat yourself to a new scent of aromatherapy
- Massage your tired feet with peppermint, lavender or arnica lotion
- Attend a comedy club or a play
- Go to your favorite restaurant with a friend(s)
- Enjoy a new wine, a new sangria recipe, a new or favorite cocktail or a microbrew
- Get comfy with a bowl of hot popcorn and a movie at home
- Take up a new hobby : photography, jewelry-making, pottery/ceramics, graphic arts, writing poems, journaling, painting, set up an aquarium, others.
- Yoga and/or meditation
- Listen to you favorite music
- Enjoy a gas or a wood fire if you have a fireplace
- Spend time with a pet (if you have a pet)

Just a few possibilities.


Wild Coyote

[JustJace2u]

Originally Posted by Wild Coyote

Some types of acts of kindness to oneself:

- Exercise
- Healthy eating
- Relaxing bath
- Massage
- Contact a friend you have been missing or enjoy
- Treat yourself to your favorite meal
- Manicure/Pedicure, haircut/style/color
- Candles and relaxing atmosphere
- Purchase a warm scarf, new hat, new earrings, warm socks, thermal underwear, special PJs, gloves/mittens, special piece of clothing/jewelry, other
- Treat yourself to a book, a movie or to a museum, maybe new music
- Treat yourself to a new scent of aromatherapy
- Massage your tired feet with peppermint, lavender or arnica lotion
- Attend a comedy club or a play
- Go to your favorite restaurant with a friend(s)
- Enjoy a new wine, a new sangria recipe, a new or favorite cocktail or a microbrew
- Get comfy with a bowl of hot popcorn and a movie at home
- Take up a new hobby : photography, jewelry-making, pottery/ceramics, graphic arts, writing poems, journaling, painting, set up an aquarium, others.
- Yoga and/or meditation
- Listen to you favorite music
- Enjoy a gas or a wood fire if you have a fireplace
- Spend time with a pet (if you have a pet)

Just a few possibilities.


Wild Coyote

All of these sound wonderful. I guess I never thought of these as 'acts of kindness' because they are mostly things I would do anyway.